Reviews

This is what an old school zombie show looks like and its great. Even the music tooks me back to the 80's Return of the living dead movies, the guts and gore is totally George Romero Tom Savini style. And it craps all over the new age zombie trash. And as with the old zombie movies you don't need to get big budget actors because the whole point of a retro zombie show is to be B grade but entertaining. George Romero never made an A grade movie in his life and that's what makes his movies great. Stop thinking about the Walking Dead and let yourself go back to what a zombie show used to be, scary and fun.

I thought the last movie was ridiculous but the Fate of the Furious is a complete insult to the intelligence of anyone smarter than a chimpanzee. From the very first car race the director proves he has no sense of reality or physics, and yes I do realize that this is a movie and action movies do push the boundaries of reality but please lets make it a little bit believable. And whats with all the angry faces whenever someone is behind the wheel of a car. In this movie we see our hero's driving their cars on ice at high speed without the slightest hint of any sliding, not to mention being able to come to a dead stop without so much as a slip of a tire. And we see Vin Diesels car out run a heat seeking missile. But the biggest load of dog do do is when our hero's position their cars around Vin Diesel to protect him from a massive explosion. Seriously. If your a chimp you're going to enjoy this movie but if you're a semi intelligent life form give it a miss.

First of all this has nothing to do with the story of Van Helsing and in fact this show does a great disservice to the very name. Set in 2019 the vampires act and look more like zombies, the main characters aren't inspiring and the script is just plain awful. The whole thing stumbles along at a very slow pace and even the action parts are slow and predictable. As for Van Helsing well he's a woman who's been laying on, what appears to be an operating table, for quite a long time in a laboratory of sorts. Van Helsing is guarded by a lone soldier who feeds the once doctor, now vampire, with his own blood via an iv line. Sounds ridiculous? well it is. The Syfy channel is quite good at bringing out crap TV series and with this one they don't disappoint.

I found myself feeling very disappointed when the final credits for this movie began to roll. Disappointed that I had wasted my time watching this movie to the end. If I had stopped at the start of the final battle then maybe I would have walked away with some sort of admiration for what the director had produced. But i didn't! The ridiculous colored tracer bullets being fired by every weapon used throughout the film wasn't nearly as outrageous as the final battle. OMG. If only the German soldiers had been this dumb in the real world wars, running in front of gun fire like ducks in a shooting gallery and being blocked by some strange force field which seemed to prevent them from getting behind the immobilized tank The Fury. I don't know how some films get such high ratings on this website but this film is not worth higher than a 5, because only half the movie is watchable.