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The Zone of Interest (2023)
Loss of Interest
Boring, mediocre acting, no plot. There are many good foreign films out there, Australia has some great great movies and series. However, Poland and England are not known for quality movies. And this is a Polish and British production, so don't expect much from this film. It's worth watching for historical purposes. The daughter that leaves apples for the prisoners, this was true and did in fact happen. Other than that one historical accuracy, this film is outright boring. Absolutely no character development at all. The little kids in the film served no purpose whatsoever, as did the mother. Rudolf Hoss and wife, nothing there. Half decent film school acting but nothing more. No plot, no story, no beginning, no ending. Steven Spielberg said he liked the film, he was just being nice.
I'm not being nice here, i'm being honest. This seemed like a "Covid" film. Filmed during shutdowns most likely, at two locations only, with 2 main actors and one scene with a handful of people. Definitely a "Covid" film. Budget was probably around $10,000.
Let me tell you something folks, if you're gonna make a film, go all out and make a real movie. Not some artsy meandering no name cheap actor film with no backbone.
In this movie, the Hoss's house is literally 20 feet away from the concentration camp, yet barely a sound is heard. One or two distant gunshots, a distant scream here and there. That is by golly gee the quietist, most peaceful concentration camp ever made! Hundereds of thousands of prisoners were tortured and murdered, thousand killed and shot every day. Yet by golly wow, such little sound. Golly gee never knew about the quiet camps. Because there were none. The noise generated from concentration camps was said to be over 150db at any given moment. That means that someone who lived up to 30 miles away could hear the noise with no problem. Living 20 feet away would be absolutely mind crushing 24 hours a day. This movie is inaccurate, no characters, no plot, no purpose, mediocre acting, bad dialogue, and extremely boring.
Nobody cares about the German characters in the movie, nobody. I don't care about them at all, they had no character development, and we never got to know any of the characters. Therefore, we care nothing about them. I mean its hard enough to care about German characters anyway, but in this film there is nothing to care about. Absolutely nothing. I hope someone remakes this film the way it should have been, with better actors, a plot, a purpose and historical accuracy as far as what was really happening in and around the concentration camp.
The River was so peaceful in this movie, although in real life people escaped constantly from the trains and from the camps directly down the area behind the concentration camp. There were armed guards back there, the fences were electric and were constantly electrocuting people, it was chaos. Nothing like what was portrayed in this waste of a film. Zero stars for this tedious garb.
Upload (2020)
Upload Season 3
Upload Season 1 was excellent, season 2 was good, Season 3 was absolutely torturous. In season one we have some really creative writing, great characters, dog therapists, great visual scenes. In season 2 we have nothing new but still a lot of laughs. In Season 3 we have absolutely zero laughs, a bunch of horrible out of place romance, and no character development. No writing either. Why is season 3 so terrible? Because there is absolutely no purpose. Nobody in season 3 has a purpose, it's just a bunch of the same old meandering around doing nothing. Everybody is making duplicates of everybody. When a writer can't think of anything creative what does he do? Creates a clone of the main character or characters to confuse people. Oh, we're paying attention now mr writer, wow , a clone of a clone. Haha, nope, i'm falling asleep. Wow, a goat, a pig, a blue face guy, its just a hodgepodge of gumbo soup all thrown into the dumpster at the end of the night. You know, the smelly dumpster behind the sushi place. Dump this season out and cancel this show.
The Fare (2018)
3 stars is generous
First of all, i never liked Greek mythology back in my school days. Greek mythology is dull and boring, Zeus and Persephone and all the fancy gods. So it is quite fitting that this movie is dull and boring since it's based on Greek mythology and the underworld. Who cares about the underworld, who cares about Greek mythology, I certainly don't. As a matter of fact, I try to avoid it like the plague.
But hey, lets talk about the movie. Acting = film school adequate. This was film school acting, but decent film school acting, thats why I gave it 3 stars, very generous indeed.
I personally am not a fan of film school acting and its not the actors fault for being shallow and boring. They say the lines ok, its just that the actors themselves have no depth of character. They seem like nice people, the kind of people we meet at fancy coffehouses and wine bars, and at acting school.
Not all actors are born with the gift of depth. And not all movies require actors with a lot of depth. But this movie does! When you got two people in a car for an hour and a half yapping the same mumbo jumbo over and over, you better have tons of depth! But these two actors, nope. Decent capable actors, but no depth. Thats what really ruined the movie for me. I didn't care about these people, and I didn't buy into the love story between them.
I did like the mysterious ambience of the desert but the movie didn't explore that at all. Just a couple lightning strikes and what not. Who cares. Boring stuff here. However....
If this movie was edited down to 25 minutes and used as a new Twilight Zone episode, it would have been very good. Twilight Zone never explored Greek Mythology and they really should have sold this as a Twilight Zone episode exploring the underworld. Leave out all the stuff in the daylight, delete the house, flowers, and all those scenes. Thats 20 minutes gone right there. Then, we only need two of the repeating driving scenes and keep the scene where Hades tells Harris to "GO BACK". Keep the scene where Harris doesn't drink the water, and he picks up a nude guy that just died. Then we understand that Harris works for Hades. And we understand that Penny gave Harris the water. Simple, 20-25 minutes max, edit this down folks and I'll change my review to 7 stars, maybe even 8 if you show Hades a little clearer.
TMZ Investigates: The Miracle Children of the Amazon (2023)
Only TMZ can ruin an interesting story
Four children supposedly survived for 40 days in the Amazon jungle. Ok. I can tell this story in 15 minutes. But no, leave it to TMZ to repeat the same lines over and over for 45 minutes. But when I found out what TMZ stands for it all made sense! Too Much Zero. Too Much of nothing, absolutely nothing.
The narrator is absolutely horrible. It doesn't sound like Harvey Levin, and there is no credit available for the narrator of this garbaje. Hey, I wouldn't want to take credit for the horrible narration either. Just give the credit to Koko the chimpanzee.
TMZ threw this together in what, maybe 2 hours at most. No follow ups on anything in this documentary. Where did the kids end up going? Did they have any permanent physical damage from the ordeal? I don't know because Too Much Zero tells me nothing.
TMZ, go home! You're worthless, your daily tv show is worthless too. Just jibber jabber talk and meaningless nonsense the whole time. They sound like they're all on coke the whole time. I'm not accusing them of being drug addicts, but just sayin. Don't sue me fancy pants. Go home TMZ.
Waco: American Apocalypse (2023)
Bad cast for a documentary
Although this documentary was informative, it was extremely boring. The only speakers that had anything interesting to offer were David Thibodeau and John Mclemore. The other Davidian survivors, with the exception of Heather Jones, offered nothing that gives us any insight into the thinking of the cult. Heather Jones gave some additional information on David Koresh, and how he abused her as a child.
The government agents in this documentary do a horrible job of explaining anything. It's like they're purposely trying not to give us any information at all. The worst is Chris Whitcomb. He has the most screentime of all the people in this documentary. He yacks off mumbo jumbo about nothing for 3 episodes. His idiotic account of pointing a rifle at David Koresh in the middle of the night and not pulling the trigger. "Yeah I think about it all the time", he says. Sure buddy. Whatever. Chris Whitcomb comes off as completely into himself. Showing off his fancy tattoos, babbling garbage about nothing that we even care about. What we wanted to hear about was the inside workings of the cult. Actually it would be nice to hear about the inside workings of the FBI and ATF, but every word that comes out of their mouths is complete nonsense.
Bob Ricks, Jim Cavanaugh,Bill Buford, and Gary Noesner, complete waste of time. Keep your day job guys or at your age make sure your pensions are making money because you're the most boring people on the face of the planet. Total boredom from these guys, but at least no tattoos to show off.
David Thibodeau and John Mclemore came off as being honest, informative, and emotionally stable enough to express themselves correctly. The ex FBI agents and tattoo grandpa came off as totally emotionless pieces of marble statue.
Thanks to David Thibodeau and John Mclemore for making this documentary watchable.
To sum things up, DON"T HIRE GOVERNMENT WORKERS FOR DOCUMENTARIES! It never works. They just want to talk about themselves and make everything about them. Hey tattoo grandpa Chris, better take care of that slippery finger, don't wanna get arthritis at your age, then you won't be able to shoot them skeet in yer backyard! And please, I beg you, please find another hobby besides being in documentaries, please.
Too Old to Die Young (2019)
slow, boring, too many subtitles
There are 2 good things about this series, hence, 2 stars. The first is Miles Teller, great acting. The second is the San Fernando Valley, I like all the nostalgia in the Valley, old abandoned malls in Burbank and North Hollywood, all the restaurants, etc. There you go, 2 stars.
Miles Teller was a great character in this series, too bad the writing didn't allow the character to develop enough. He became more of a vigilante and less of a cold blooded killer as the series progressed, but still not enough thoughful writing to provoke any kind of meaningful context of character. All of the other characters were throwaways, junk. Decent acting by all, thats not the problem. The problem is the writing, horrible writing.
Anybody remember the comedy show "Cuckoo"? Andy Samberg plays a character called "Cuckoo", the main character, the only good character on the show, the only reason to watch "Cuckoo". After the first few episodes Samberg left the show, but the show kept going! The show went from 1 million viewers to 1,000 viewers overnight.
The same thing happens on "Too Old to Die Young". Miles Teller gets killed off in episode 8, leaving the last two horrible episodes to meander in toiletland. How stupid are you writers anyway? Definitely Cuckoo.
All of the characters on the show speak fluent English, including the so called Mexican characters. There's really no need for subtitles in this series. Subtitles are reserved for "foreign" films and shows. This is not a foreign show. Is it hip to have half the show in Spanish? Yes, very hip, and we want to be hip. Being hip is more important than writing a good show. We're from L. A., and we are hip. That's what this show says. "Lets be hip", "Lets try to be young again even though we are washed up and old". The producers, directors and writers always want to try to stay hip and young, but in this case they failed, they really are too old to be young.
The correct title for this series should be "Not Too Old to Write Dung"
The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)
boring, slow, depressing, junk, good acting
I give this movie 1 star for the writing and 3 stars for the good acting, so average that out and you get 2 stars. As I have said in my other reviews, there are a lot of movies lately with good acting and horrible writing. This is another example. First of all we have a period piece with good sets, wardrobe, pub, horses, everything, so DO SOMETHING WITH IT ! Whats wrong with you? Those were the most boring pub scenes in the history of film-making! Good acting with nowhere to go. Kerry Condon overacted the whole time, I guess she thought she was still in Hamlet. YOU'RE NOT IN HAMLET ANYMORE, KERRY! Get over yourself.
Ok, so the storyline. Guy cuts fingers off for no reason. Ok, brilliant! Holy horsepie, seriously? Seriously. No, Seriously? No. Yes, that is the storyline. Maybe this is Celtic humor, or Celtic horror, or Celtic history, don't know, don't care, never will. Guy burns down house. Holy fire batman, wowza wowza, fire! Fire! Fire! Geez, this is cowpie.
The sad scene is when Colin's baby mule Jenny ate an artichoke and died, or a finger, sorry, i think Jenny Artichoke was Irish. See, thats funnier than anything in this movie. Was this a black comedy, nope, was this a drama, nope, none, was this an artsy film, nope, no artistic value or merit, was this a bland non-alcoholic Irish coffee? Yes sir! This is bland non-alcoholic Irish coffee! Not worth the money or the time.
Oh, Jenny Artichoke come home to Colin and stop his tears. But wait, hold on, hold on horsey, hold on, this would have been a good 15 minute short film, but not a great one. Edit this beast down to 15 minutes and i'll give it another star.
The Black Phone (2021)
seriously?
The only good think about this movie is that it's set in 1974, and some of the sets look good. They got a whole bunch of junker 70's cars too, which really does look like the 70's. The problem is that nowdays in the 2020's we don't have junker cars anymore, but we do have junker movies, tons of em. If there was a movie junkyard it would be full of this kind of trash. So many junker movies right now, and this idiotic piece of spooge is no exception. Totally ridiculous. Extreme garbage in the highest degree. Waste of my time. Nothing to offer. What else? Not scary at all. KInd of like Scooby Doo with blood. Aimed at middle-schoolers who get a hold of their parents Prime video password. Seriously? Is this even really a movie? Take this and dump it in the movie junkyard along with all these other nonsense good for nothing wastes of time. "The Black Phone" , also the most unoriginal title in the history of film. Is this even film any more? Nope, its not. But, hey yous guys , i gotta go now, I got important stuff to do, I gotta leave one of my junker reviews for another junkyard piece of garbage " Avatar II - The way of the junkyard"
Human Capital (2019)
Ray Donovan whats wrong wit you?
Here we get a sorry weak wimpy version of Ray Donovan's character. I think this movie came out slightly after the last season of Ray Donovan but wait, here's how this film shoulda played out. Ray Donovan (Drew) gives $300,000 to rich guy to invest in hedge funds. Rich guy loses all of Ray's money. Ray beats rich guy with a baseball bat. Rich guy hires thugs to kill Ray's wife and daughter, but they aren't dead, they just end up in the hospital. Then Ray finds out that his daughter Bridget (shannon) has a boyfriend that struck a bicycle rider while boyfriend was driving rich guys car. Ray gets Bridget and boyfriend to conspire as witnesses that it was rich guy that struck and killed to bicycle rider. Rich guy goes to prison and the Donovan's live happily ever after.
But sadly, this movie was weak and had no guts. I don't remember anyone's name in this movie. Netflix gets a lot of these duds. I watched it because of Ray Donovan just like everyone else. This movie wouldn't have seen the light of day if it wasn't for 6 seasons of Ray Donovan. But in all honesty, Liev Schriber's acting in this film was mediocre at best. None of the other actors stood out either, and the plot was too undefined. Scenes are repeated from different starting and ending points which is extremely annoying. Just show the movie from start to finish and stop going back and forth. Note to writer and director: next time concentrate on writing a decent film and directing better actors first. Once you get that down then maybe try to be fancy with the time layout of the film. Or better yet, go back to film school and start from scratch.
The Power of the Dog (2021)
Good acting, self indulgent writing.
This is not a Western so don't get your hopes up. It has some cows and horses and a place that very slightly resembles Montana, but nope, not a Western or even close. Western=nothing for this movie. Did I mentiion that this is not a Western?
Anyway, the writer thinks he/she is smarter than the audience and throws in a twist near the end of the film where skinny boy Peter infects Phil with Anthrax. The circumstances surrounding this murder of sorts isn't well written. Did Peter conspire with his mother to murder Phil? Peters mother gave Phil's hides to the Indians, so we might assume that action created the opportunity for Peter to offer the Anthrax hides to Phil, but we don't know. If we go by the beginning of the film then we can assume that it was only Peter who conspired to murder Phil to protect his mother. But if his mother did not give the hides away, Peter would have no opportunity to offer Phil the Anthrax contaminated hides.
But in all honesty, who cares? I don't care, do you care? Nope. We don't care, we really don't . Because this isn't even a Western. It's marketed as a Western, but its just a short story made into a 2 hour boring no-action mumbo jumbo hodgepodge of gumbo soup.
I enjoyed the acting, which is the case with a lot of poorly written films lately. Actors need work and they don't care if the writing is flawed. And they were probably told that they were going to be in a Western! But nope, sorry good actors, your in a student short film with a big budget, nice locations, and great film equipment, all stretched out into a 2 hour film.
I couldn't careless about any of the characters in this film, no emotional content whatsoever. There was good character development, but that does no good when we don't care about the characters.
I didin't enjoy this film, but I watched it anyway because it was supposed to be a Western, and I like Westerns, however, this isn't a Western. Get along little power doggies and don't come back.
Disobedience (2017)
Good acting, bad writing.
First of all, I gave this movie 5 stars for the good acting. But why gather a great bunch of actors together if you're not going to write the narrative correctly? This movie literally had about 5 or 6 funerals for the same guy. I am aware that in certain traditions there are many days of mourning following a death in the family and especially for a Rabbi. But I don't need to see all of them! You don't need to see all of them! Nobody needs to see all of them! Holy cow folks, it begins with someone dying, then goes to the graveyard, then another funeral, and more mourning at home, and ends at the graveyard. In between is about 30 minutes of a decent movie. That's the first major flaw.
The second major flaw is that Ronit says at the beginning of the film that Esti, Dovid , and herself were always together when they were younger. It is then assumed that Esti and Ronit were in a relationship before Esti and Dovid were married. So what was Dovid doing all this time? If all three were always together there's something wrong there. Dovid already knew that Esti and Ronit were doing something unacceptable by their community. Out of all the women to pick for marriage, he picks the one woman, Esti, that he knew wasn't interested in men and unconforming to their community.
I can't feel sorry for any of the characters in this movie because the flawed writing doesn't allow me to. And when Esti and Ronit were inolved previous to Dovids marriage, why wasn't Dovid dating anyone? Just waiting around to marry the only girl he knew was a lesbian? Makes no sense. Thats the second major flaw.
The third major flaw is making Esti become pregnant during these few days while Ronit was visiting. Talk about timing! Wow, you got it going on girl! Great timing. In the course of 2 days, Esti has enough time to go to 6 funerals for the same man, have sex 2 times with her husband, and go on a sex parade with her lover Ronit. How old are you Esti? You look at least 40, maybe even 45. Ronit, you look a good 42, and Dovid, I would say at least 40. Thats some serious libido for some serious middle aged funeral attendees in this seriously flawed slow paced, boring, but well acted movie.
Me Time (2022)
one-off junk
Mark Wahlberg, why are you in this movie? Use your talents for real movies. We all know by now that this movie is junk, but one question remains. Why are all the actors talking so fast? Its like one of those commercials where they have to squeeze a bunch of lines into 30 seconds. Actually when i took a good listen to a lot of the lines delivered in this film, I came to the conclusion that the editor sped up the voices while keeping the same pitch. This is ridiculous. Speed up the actors lines so you can squeeze more junk into an already junky film. This is the most interesting aspect of this film though. It made me realize that this is a new thing. Speeding up delivered lines to move the film along at a faster pace, especially when it seems incredibly boring. Wow, very interesting. This is the beginning of the new Hollywood, not only are we now using ADR for an entire film or show, we are now altering the original speed at which the lines were delivered. We could slow them down too, but that isn't as useful a technique. I probably would have never noticed it except for the fact that almost every line in this film was delivered at break neck speed. But it wasn't delivered that way, just edited to sound extremely fast. Go watch this junk and you'll see, its ridiculous and a waste.
Hellbender (2021)
Acting school anybody?
Someone put together some nice effects for this movie, especially the acid trippy scenes. That person will go on to do bigger and better things. The actors on the other hand, not at all. "Izzy" had no depth of character whatsoever, and the blond friend wasn't even able to pull off a few simple lines The mom was ok, she did the best she could with what they gave her. No story, no writing and no direction. It even seemed like they were going for a humorous style of horror at times. The only really funny scenes though were the unintentional ones, like the Park Ranger in overalls that didn't fit. I hope I don't see any of these actors again as long as I live.
Westworld (2016)
Season 4 review (so far)
I enjoyed the first 2 seasons of Westworld, the 3rd season was spotty, the 4th season is mumbo jumbo. Who's writing this? Seriously? What are you people thinking? Robots vs Humans, who cares! I don't care. All the new actors mug throughout each entire episode. Tessa Thompson, whats going on with you? Do you need to go back to acting school? You did great in the first season, what happened to your acting chops? You're overacting every single line. Whats wrong with these people? Ed Harris, you're still spot on, but why waste your skills on this show? Its not good anymore. Who's who, what's what, and who cares? Nobody cares! Who's watching season 4 of westworld, nobody! 150,000 viewers now compared to 2 million during season one. Shovels and guns , shovels and guns, shovels and guns. Lots of shovels, lots of guns. Hey, why don't we start a new show called "Shovels and Guns" staring Tessa Thompson as your overacting theatre personality and the first episode will be called "Calebs Tears". Oh Caleb, tears in every scene, can't hold them back poor Caleb. We feel for ya buddy, your daughter is roaming the same 100 square foot piece of land with the same flowers on it now for 5 episodes. Who cares? I don't care Caleb, i really don't. And Bernard. Who used ot be Anthony Hopkins, or did they do the switcheroo? Mauve and pretty girl did the switcheroozie, but did they switch back? Pretty girl seems like the same pretty girl from season 1, no new wrinkles or anything. Mauve is looking, well, quite mauve in the face. Bernard, you need to smile more, your so sad. Caleb, great tears buddy, keep them onions handy. Oh yeah Teddy, you look like you shoulda been on Leave it to Beaver. And Ed Harris, stop wasting your skills on this nonsense. Blah Blah Blah, shovels and guns, shovels and guns. Ouch, a shovel to the face hurts more that a wince and a grin. And rubber white bad guys, what are you? Why are you here on this show? You look like you should be in a 3rd grade school classroom with all the tendons in big letters. What is this? Shovels and guns, boooooo. Go home westworld.