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Monkey Man (2024)
4/10
Glitter dressed men
24 April 2024
Movie was all over the place it was like watching someone play GTA and doing pointless side quests.

No characters got you attatched to them in the slightest.

The trailer was the best part of this movie as it showed all the best bits.

Imagine fighting a load of guys and a bunch of glitter wearing transgendas come to your aid to help you fight I actually failed to understand what was going on with the main character. Can he fight? Oh yes he can but not until transgendas taught him to hit a bag of rice to a beat of a drum (strange) some scenes are way to long and lacked much needed editing.

All in sll it's ok but don't expect to much from the movie you have not already seen in the trailer.
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Road House (2024)
2/10
Oh dear
22 March 2024
Roadhouse with swayze (rip) was a good movie to watch not over the top and no stupid fight scenes.

This one however is absolutely diabolical, the fight scenes are absolutely awful and just plain unrealistic.

Jake does kind of a good job but that's probably because he is the actor we actually know and seen his other movies.

Connor on the other hand, all I can say is no, don't quit your day job for acting as he was awful and it was very cringe worthy.

The story kind of was similar to the original but way off the pace.

Jake plays a terminator, i was waiting for Arnold to beam down to stop him.

This is just a fight movie with very poor fight scenes oh and a killer Croc you kind of see once.

This movie didn't even come within touching distance of the original, it's another reason why Hollywood should just let classics be classics and come up with something new.

A Friday night movie with your partner is a maybe but please don't expect to go "wow".

Ordinary movie with some bad acting, bad script, bad story and terrible fight scenes.
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Silent Night (2023)
6/10
It's very quiet
20 December 2023
Right here we go.

This overall is not a bad movie, the action is good when it happens towards the end.

The big issue is that NOBODY speaks which is completely weird. Whoever cane up with the idea of absolutely no one to talk really needs to think about that choice and never do it again.

The good guy can't talk I get that bug the wife doesn't talk the cops don't talk and the bad guys don't talk, but they all have no reason not to talk. There is just times you wait for some speech from someone but it never happens.

Due to know one talking it makes it a very hard to watch and is rather boring. It's like watching all sports on your tv with no crowd noise or commentary and if you ever tried that it makes the sport very boring indeed.

All in all I gave it a 6 star as the action was good. Not so sure why woo took out his doves and replaced it with some strange looking CGI love bird though.

But all an all if this had a script with actual voices I'm sure the movie would of been much better to watch and would of recieved better reviews.
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1/10
Absolute bore fest
29 October 2023
This movie is absolutely boring to the core it makes nicholas cage movie willy's wonderland look like a complete master piece (which it isn't) this movie consists of bad acting, flash back dreams, and some fluffy robots.. But for first hour or so not much actually really happens, you will struggle to actually want to watch the entire movie after being so bored already.

Why is it a 15 (uk) no one really knows, a little blood here little blood there is about it.

This title and any other they make will go down to the pit with all the other badly done video games to movies.

It seems lately anything blumhouse touch turns to sludge rather than gold..

Fans of the game will think this is a great movie for the fact is they like the animatronic figures alone but are forgetting about what makes a good movie.
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3/10
MEETS HIS EQUAL??
4 October 2023
Equalizer 3 well....

This movie is a complete bore fest of a film. It is nothing like the other 2 at all.

Most of the movie consists of watching denzel on the phone, drinking tea or walking around.

Gone are the times you remember from the first movie with him checking his watch for how long it takes him to kill the bad guys. The reason for this is because you don't really see him kill any bad guys (a handful).

Denzel character never felt in danger so i dont know why the trailer made it out like he met his equal as i dont recall him getting injured whilst In his new found happy place.

So many people at the start of the movie have guns (adults) but yet doesn't get shot until a small child takes aims and fires and nearly kills denzel.

All in all set in a nice back drop but honestly if you don't speak Italian or can't read the subtitles then you won't have a clue what's going on as majority of movie is in Italian.

Conclusion = boring movie, lazy script, boring bad guys, nothing really ever happens unless you enjoy tea.

Was it a good send off? NO NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST.
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Retribution (I) (2023)
5/10
LITTLE BIT OF CHEESE
19 September 2023
The movie in all is not really that bad. The acting was a little cheesy at times and the script was a bit cringe in places. Not enough story behind the characters either.

Its entertaining but nothing special but this movie has the worst ending I have seen for a long time it's just plain awful ending a movie like this if should be a criminal offence.

No movie should end with out a conclusion it's just pure lazy film making.

Liam Neeson is getting old now but saying that I think he has always been old, bit of a boring character in this movie but never really seems to act, every movie of his he feels like the same character in every movie. But that ending what on earth.
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Barbarian (2022)
2/10
What is a barbarian?
12 November 2022
The answer to the title will never been known.

The first act was creepy and suspenseful but then it was cut short in one foul swoop and from the moment justin long appeared the movie went down hill quickly. I actually thought it jumped to a different movie.

A door closes but no one knows why or how.

I am still wondering why its 18 rated aswell.

Is it scary definitely NOT.

So many things in this movie were unexplained, leaving the story, oh sorry wait what story?

A creepy ghost feeling starts the movie off but then strange things happen with out knowing why.

Why would a house be in perfect condition amongst a run down mess of a place? This is just one of many questions unanswered.
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3/10
For family
4 August 2021
What a load of over exaggerated action poop.

Need I say more when I say "yes, 2 men went to space in a car" How can fast and furious go from car racing to this rubbish.
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Bad Movie For Life
1 April 2020
This movie is boring, predictable, bad story, bad characters bad acting. It's brings shame to the past 2 bad boy movies, this third installment didn't need to happen at all. It kind of brought Will Smiths "gemini man" into the story. Martin Lawrence should not have even been in this movie as he did nothing but act like a footballers wife. His character was stale and any thing he brought to this third movie was nothing a pregnant women could not of brought to if. Don't waste your time on this movie watch the first 2 movies and stop at that.
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5/10
The finale
11 February 2020
The first 2 were epic the 3rd not do good this 4th installment had the story and emotions spot on, the thing it lacked compared to the first 2 were the fight scenes, the fight scenes seemed all to much wire worked for me. The acting was OK from the Chinese but the acting from Americans was just awful. Scott did OK as he himself is a very impressive martial artist but lacks the acting skills apart from boyka. All in all this movie is worth a watch due to emotions and story telling but anything else not do good. Donnie yen is a beast beat down 8 men at a club for harrasing his girlfriend and put all 8 in hospital in actual life. No actor could of pulled off ip man other than Donnie yen.
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6 Underground (2019)
5/10
Slo motion baby
15 December 2019
An average action film, way to much slo mo and full of mistakes, Here's one example in the opening scene while escape in a car the driver (dave Franco) has a cap on then it vanishes then it appears then vanishes again several times. Worth a watch if your not interested in stories of characters as this film has no story and lack of character story.
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Sniper Corpse (2019)
1/10
You want a review?
26 November 2019
Not on this movie I won't it's not worth my time saying it was bad or good just look at the 1 star says it all
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6/10
Rambo?? Not really
24 November 2019
This was not a bad movie as critics say, It's a good watch a little bit to much copy cat of other movies though. 2 things that annoyed me was It's called rambo but really had no relation to any other rambo films at all in the slightest.it was more "taken" than anything else The other annoying bit us way to much Mexican speaking language which kind of ruins it for me. But saying that it's worth a watch just to see how mad sly can get.
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Ready or Not (I) (2019)
5/10
Ready or not?
23 November 2019
To be fair I was ready but then I was not. I found this movie boring and very long winded, I say this because the hunting and killing started really early in the film and just continued to be the same throughout. Not much story line as the game started to early for me. Nice simple movie with a few silly parts but worth a watch when it's discounted.
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1/10
What goes in bins?
20 November 2019
Rubbish, waste, rotten food,dirty nappies, and this movie
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Danger Close (2019)
9/10
This is sparta
10 November 2019
Amazing film, grit and determination from the aussies was insane. Watch it, enjoy it, remember it.
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Good Boys (2019)
4/10
Good film???
30 October 2019
No not really, I found it boring and unfunny. It was more if a "Let's get some 12yr olds and see how many times we can get them to say the word. Way to much swearing and sex references considering it was about kids around 12yrs old. Didn't enjoy it one bit, a few laughing parts which are basically in the trailer but apart from that it's a go to sleep movie.
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1/10
Blind sharks!!!
27 October 2019
Warning: Spoilers
Blind sharks give me a break if they evolved like this they would of been dead years ago due to no food supply as I only see 2 fish down in the tomb. 2 girls get bit in the rib cage and survive get real that's just so far fetched. This movie is so far fetched it breaks all knowledge of sharks and turns it into a sharknado movie. To far fetched for me by far, and just stupid and silly.
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2/10
Ufc or acting?? Neither...
26 October 2019
I tell you what cm punks acting is as good as his ufc career useless, this movie is just bad and plain and not at all as gory as people make out. Don't watch this rubbish it's well rubbish. No story telling no character build up and no remorse in cheating on a pregnant wife is just plain stupid. This is not even worth a watch with spare time to kill.
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3/10
The art of unfunny
14 October 2019
Was I missing something as this movie was very unfunny very boring and very stupid and very hard to watch due to how boring and slow it was
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3 from Hell (2019)
2/10
Garbage
13 October 2019
This movie is basically the same as "the devils rejects" with a different ending. This movie is pure garbage. Nothing else to say.
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Stuber (2019)
6/10
STUpid or STUpendous
4 October 2019
This was not that bad if a movie really, it had its entertaining moments it had its funny moments. A very big downfall though that in this movie batista can not see correctly always tripping over things etc but then in some scenes he shoots people in the head, picks up small items and can fight people all with out having a problem with his eyes but in other scenes he struggles to fight struggles to pick up items and struggles to shoot. The guy stu is not as comical as the guy driving the taxi in deadpool but he does have his moments. So all in all its worth a watch its not terrible at all.
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Midsommar (2019)
3/10
Flower power
24 September 2019
I must tell the truth I hated this movie it was boring, slow and I have no idea what was going on. Bland story telling, bland characters lack of telling us what was going on. I found it yawn worthy, artistic yes but as for anything else no. No horror genre here at all just the same predictable stuff we see in every movie, plus calling it a horror is like calling The Raid a kids film. Some will like this others will most certainly not. Way to much flower power going on here.i hate every film like this just as I did hereditary, vvitch, the visit,mother, amongst others. Enjoyable movie?? No not really.
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2/10
I'm furious
21 September 2019
This was just boredom to the extreme, Way to much futuristic uses near to the point of terminator or even close to x-men. Hobbs and Shaws characters from the fast and furious movies were just taken away, they both were totally different than they were portrayed in the fast and the furious. Way to much wise cracks infact nearly every line in the movie was a wise crack towards someone. Considering they are both portrayed as bad asses they are very comical and laid back to the point you forget one was a bad guy and the other a tough cop. I only watched half and won't watch the last half as I was bored from the begining. No wonder the fast and furious cast were how to say furious about this movie even being made
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Child's Play (2019)
1/10
Ruined
11 September 2019
Congratulations you just ruined a classic with a pointless remake. 1: the doll is really really stupid looking. 2:women gets a doll for free which would likely cost over a thousand to buy considering it's advanced AI 3: programmed to be bad is just poor really poor and lazy 4:the doll is way to advanced for a kids toy. 5:last scene is just bad very bad 6:a women gets tied up and taped mouth by a doll? Give me a break. 7:this movie is just anorher attempt to reboot a classic and failed miserably.
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