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Reviews
Het bombardement (2012)
This might be one of the worst movies ever
So many plot holes and such boring dialogues it is hard to watch the whole movie. I had to watch as my girlfriend decided she wanted to see a Dutch movie, but it was cringe-worthy at best. Watched it in Dutch with English subtitles, but it would probably have been better to watch it dubbed in a different language. The main character is supposed to come from Utrecht and living in Rotterdam, but doesn't have an Utrecht nor a Rotterdam accent. In fact, most of the actors don't have a Rotterdam accent which would be okay-ish if the supposedly German characters weren't speaking with the worst German accents ever. German grammar is murdered in the worst way and none of the alleged Germans have believable German accents. Eva, his main love interest, is supposed to be a German girl who grew up in Rotterdam, but somehow struggles speaking German and speaks Dutch with an Amsterdam accent. I have to say though that apart from the horrible accents the plot and the acting by the actors would make Dutch people ashamed to be Dutch. Though the story of the German bombardment of Rotterdam could have been a good story, it is being told in such a way that would might develop some sympathy for the Germans. The only good thing about the movie is that it is not very long and in 1,5 hours one can watch something good again.
Blood of the Vikings (2001)
One of the best documentaries you'll ever see
This BBC documentary is one of the best documentaries you'll ever see. It is very well researched, very well narrated and they are not afraid to explore some controversial theories. There are 6 episodes, but I'm sure they could have made 60 episodes if they would have had the budget. The documentary focuses on vikings in Britain and Ireland and details the story from the first written records on viking raids until the end of the viking age. A must see for anyone who is interested in the subject but wants facts and not sensationalist revisionist history. If you're used to History Channel documentaries you will probably miss all the fighting scenes with people dressed up as vikings, but are not very true to history. It goes into great detail and explains the history very clearly using facts as the basis. Everything is well referenced and researched but it is in no way boring or less entertaining.
Sahara (2005)
Entertaining but nothing else
I guess if you like nonsense films like Indiana Jones you'll love this, but if you have any notion at all of archaeology, West Africa, geography or ecology it is pretty much an insult to your intelligence. That actually makes it good. It is funny and it is fun how wrong this movie is in every single way. If I would have watched it in the cinema I would have demanded my money back but when you have a bit of time to spare and noting else to do it is definitely watchable as an action-comedy. Don't take it too seriously, don't try to discover a meaningful plot, don't rationalise any of the stunts. Sailing a plane through the dessert and stunts that contradict all laws of physics known to men.....that is what you'll get to see and the lighting is pleasant. Cinematographically it is a well made movie and I suspect the horrible plot was intended to be this bad for comedy's sake. See it as a spoof on Indiana Jones and you'll like it. Take it too seriously and you'll loath it.
Cyborg 2: Glass Shadow (1993)
avoid at all costs
Avoid at all costs - had to put it off halfway through. Bad acting, worse dialogues, lousy story and some of the worst lighting ever witnessed in a movie. The story is as weak as the first one, but the sequel isn't even watchable as horribly bad B-movie. Not even Angelina Jolie in tight outfits makes it any better and the acting by Angelina is just painful to watch. It looks like it was filmed in a storehouse over the weekend and edited by a 7 year old. I gave it 2 out of 10 and that was only because I think it will have a certain cult following, but it is just not for me. Allegedly even Angelina Jolie didn't like it and got sick after watching it. I feel your pain, Angelina, I felt the same and I didn't even watch the whole movie.