Change Your Image
Greybear33
Reviews
The Terminators (2009)
Yet another crappy Asylum film
Unbelievably BAD.... Horrible, Excruciating, worse than a kidney stone!!! Well... unbelievable unless you have been exposed to The Asylum's films or Jose Prendes writing before!! Since The Asylum has made a couple of watchable films, I thought I would give this one a shot since it came on my cable and I wasn't spending any money to rent it. Then I saw that it was written by Jose Prendes, responsible for such piles of Dog POO as Corpses are Forever and The Monster Man. Again... Avoid at all COSTS!!! What can I say about the movie that other unfortunate viewers have already stated... Okay... a society that has space flight, massive high tech space station and the ability to produce mass quantities of human looking androids?????? Yet Earth cities look boringly familiar, Ahhhh... lower set costs, they can only produce ONE? model of android, Ahhh... cheaper cast, pathetic dialog, Jose Prendes at his usual drek, low end basic special effects and wounds...
This movie is worse than a waste of time, it's painful to watch even for more than 20 minutes and I'm sorry to say I watched longer than that so I could honestly speak towards the Horrible quality of this film.
Run away.. Spend your time better by watching a blank TV screen or even better read a book, or as a previous review stated get a root canal.
Oh... and ending your review by saying (I don't work for them) really doesn't fool us.
GAK!!!
Forest of the Dead (2007)
Possibly the worst movie I have ever seen
It is incredible to me that there are people out there that will actually produce and distribute a movie as bad as this. Apparently they will let just anyone with a home movie camera put together a piece of crap like this and call it a movie. The film quality actually a little better than Jose Prendes "Monster Man" but that's not saying much. The dialog was actually worse and I didn't think that was possible. Amazingly the acting was in a world of it's own. A whole new level of BAD. These people couldn't act if it would save their lives. The Rebel without a clue, the two gay French Canadians (whose accents were worse than crap but better than their acting), the girls...... well they were female but their interaction with each other and the guys was beyond faking it. The two worst were the idiot in the fake afro and the nerd that ran away crying with his hands flapping in the air. Run screaming away, Don't waste your time or money on this one. I want my hour plus BACK.
Darkest Hour (2005)
Carefull....Watching this could make you sick from how crappy it is...
Dialogue: Actors couldn't even say lines this bad with a straight face. Acting: Well what can you say... I think the acting was the same quality you would find from picking up unemployed strangers on the side of the road and giving them their lines 5 minutes before filming.
Film quality: Handy cam quality, fuzzy, out of focus, as bad or worse than that seen in Monster Man.
Painted host for the "Slasher flick" weekend: Sorry but your every attempt to be ominous or scary would have made me laugh had I been in the group.
Overall: Don't waste your time... not worth the slot it would take from your video rental.
Don't get me wrong, I love Indie Horror and hats off to these folks for trying but there is LOTS of room for improvement.
The Monster Man (2001)
Absolutely terrible
Worse even than Corpses are forever. How people like Tom Savini and the great Miss Quigley were pulled into this specimen I will only wonder. I can think of no situation or circumstance that I would suggest this to anyone.
Not Funny. No special effects. I have seen better dialog in the quiet times of Castaway. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to find the most humor in: The aliens costumes - jogging suits and rain coats. film quality - grainy at the very best, eye straining most of the time. I am sure that it is meant to be funny but they only thing you find humorous is that Mr Prendes has made more than one attempt at film-making. Run away.