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The Descent
The Descent (2005)
1/10
Do not rent - Dire
19 November 2005
Warning: Spoilers
This movie is simply dire. It's predictable, clichéd, tripe.

The casting is weak (at least two feigned British accents); and the plot has so many holes it borders on the ridiculous.

The director treats us to a glaringly-obvious and wholly unoriginal scene-setting at the outset... which is rehashed throughout as "flash back". If this is intended to highlight a common emotional bond between (some) of the characters, it fails drastically. The subterranean creatures fail to scare in the *least*. He employs predictable scare tactics ad nauseum: sudden cuts to violent flights of noisy birds and bats.

Do not rent. This is directorial detritus.
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Histoire de Pen
Histoire de Pen (2002)
1/10
Terrible
21 October 2005
Released under "Banged Up" (Cert 18) in the Irish/UK markets.

Avoid this made-for-TV tripe at all costs.

Not only does this "movie" suffer from an absence of plot and a liberal peppering of flash-backs throughout (yawn...); the disc production is wholly sub-standard:

A) This movie is *dubbed* into English (not subtitled). B) Colour conversion from NTSC->PAL is awful. (Unless the original was also bathed in a crimson hue?) C) The disc is labelled as "Aspect: Full screen". Unless your TV is capable of manually resizing its picture, this movie plays out-of-aspect. Changing your player settings to 4:3 (PS/LB) are not sufficient to repair the over-stretched (tall) picture.

My DVD store were kind enough to refund my euro4.75. Hopefully others will be as sympathetic!

As for the English-language release title ("Banged Up"); this is surely a pun too far?
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