TimeNTide's Reviews

All Talking... All Singing... All Dancing (1971)

Less Than Memorable Promo for a Forgotten Feature that may be Worth a Watch

7 January 2009

This short is a behind the scenes, making of promo for the musical feature film "The Boy Friend" (1971). I saw it on TCM in the US where it plays occasionally.

This short was a bit educational for me for two reasons. First, even though I grew up in the 70's, I don't remember even hearing about the film "The Boy Friend". I assumed it was probably forgotten because it was lousy, but it actually has a very good IMDb user rating, so I'll have to check it out if I ever get the chance. Second, although I grew up hearing about the skinny 60's fashion model icon named Twiggy, I never knew that she became an actress, much less one that sang and danced.

As the title implies, there's lots of talking and singing and dancing in this short. Frankly, nothing that the narrator, director, production designer or Twiggy says is terribly interesting or memorable. There's lots of behind the scenes footage of dance and song rehearsals, along with clips from the feature film which is a musical set in the 1920's. Those parts are somewhat enjoyable if you like musicals.

Overall... nothing memorable in this short, but it did put me on the trail of a feature film that may be worth checking out.

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Through My Thick Glasses (2004)

Delightful Short Film, Well Written Story and Fun Claymation

6 January 2009

I can't believe that I'm the first to comment on this excellent short film. I seen this on the Sundance Channel in the US on numerous occasions and it's always entertaining and worthy of a rewatch, especially since it only takes up 12.5 minutes of your time, less if you skip the credits.

While an elderly Norwegian man bundles up his granddaughter before sending her out into the snow, he relates the tale of his repeated attempts as a youth to join the resistance against the Nazis in WWII. Although he spins his tale in an impassive fashion, it touches a wide variety of emotions... always entertaining and interesting, often hilarious and sometimes painfully sad. It's very well written.

The animation style (mostly claymation) is delightful and clever, so this is a must see for claymation fans. My favorite elements are the huge metal "wheel" that represents the Nazi war machine and the encounter with the fish on the kitchen table.

Definitely worth a watch... and another... and another...

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Dimmer (2005)

Engaging Short Film Showing a View of the Handicapped that We Never See

6 January 2009

I've seen this short on the Sundance Channel in the US a few times. At first look, it wasn't very entertaining or memorable. The second time I saw it I realized that I had missed the point and gained a lot of respect for this film.

The US media only likes to tackle the subject of handicapped people when they are being shown as victims who need to be protected or as heroic characters who overcome and achieve while displaying admirable qualities. In this film the director gives us a new take... we see a slice of life of several blind and sight impaired teenage boys who are neither victims or heroes, they are simply aimless youth like so many others in America. There are indeed some interesting and educational bits concerned with blindness, like Mike describing how he finds his driveway by recognizing the cracks and seams in the sidewalk, and Mike teaching his pal Joey to listen for echoes when tapping the walking cane.

However, most of the film is showing us that these blind guys lead the same shiftless lives as so many other "normal" teenagers do. They hang out, curse, talk smack, ride bikes, break things in abandoned buildings, work boring menial jobs, talk about rappers, fist fights and the opposite sex, and dream of travel to exotic locations without ever doing anything to work toward that goal. And like most teenage cliques, they hang out together because they don't fit in well with others. And we are shown that their emotions are no different than ours. When Mike is dumped by his seeing girlfriend over the phone, he goes through the same emotional range that the typical guy would... anger, sadness, bitterness, sour grapes ("She was ugly anyway.") and moving on ("Hey, bitches!").

The point: the fact that someone has a handicap doesn't automatically turn them into a wonderful person with admirable qualities striving to overcome their limitations, which is what the media typically wants us to believe.

Engaging and admirable short film once you understand it.

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A Hollywood Christmas (1996 Video)

Decent Retrospective on Christmas Films, Very Good Introduction for Newcomers

19 December 2008

When I recorded this off Starz in December 2008, I thought it was one of their new retrospective on film specials. But the 1.33:1 ratio and a younger looking Jane Seymour quickly clued me into the fact that I was watching something from years ago.

A fairly good retrospective on Christmas films and cartoons that has its upsides. And it covers a lot more films than is currently shown on the movie connections page.

Upsides:

1. If you are part of a younger generation or are not familiar with some of the classic Christmas films (e.g. "It's a Wonderful Life", "Miracle on 34th Street") for other reasons, this doc is a nice introduction to those. And this includes a number of very good films which have a Christmas theme, but you wouldn't know that from their title (e.g. "Meet John Doe", "The Bishop's Wife").

2. A few of the clips are from films that your are not likely to see anywhere else (e.g. the 1898 short film "Santa Claus"), unless you really go hunting for them.

3. Host/narrator Jane Seymour does a pretty good job of staying out of the way and letting the lengthy film clips do most of the talking. And some of the tidbits that she does offer are interesting (e.g. all-time classic "It's a Wonderful Life" was a huge box office disappointment at the time).

4. It does a nice job of pointing out which now classic Christmas songs debuted in film (e.g. the song "White Christmas" came from the film "Holiday Inn").

Downsides:

1. Some of the contemporary Christmas films discussed are (way) less than classic (e.g. "Santa Claus: The Movie", "Jingle All the Way").

2. Although it mentions that the success of TV Christmas specials has really curtailed the making of theatrically released Christmas films, it doesn't really cover those (as the title implies, I guess). That's too bad since many of the TV Christmas specials are as classic as some of the great films.

3. This information is this doc is rather wide, but not very deep. So, it's a good introduction to Christmas films for newcomers, but doesn't have much to offer to someone who's seen most or all of the classic Christmas films, unless they just want to enjoy the clips.

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Gifted and Challenged: The Making of 'Shortbus' (2007 Video)

Somewhat Interesting Look at the Unusual Process Used to Create a Unique Film

13 December 2008

This behind the scenes documentary for the feature film "Shortbus" (2006) is somewhat atypical. Like most "making of" documentary shorts, it uses interviews with the director and cast, behind the scenes footage and short clips from the feature film. However, this short is more of a review and explanation of the unique development process of this unusual feature film, and since it was produced and released after the feature film, we know that it's not merely a promotional tool intended to convince viewers to buy tickets to the feature film.

Most films get their production started with getting a script approved. For the film "Shortbus", director John Cameron Mitchell simply started with the idea that he wanted to use real sex in a film that had a positive message. This concept drove the development stage of the film in an unusual direction, first finding acceptable non-porn actors who were willing to have sex on screen, and then using numerous improv workshops with those actors to develop the characters and script. Mitchell states that he was creating the process in addition to the script and the film.

The actors were initially selected from hundreds of homemade audition videos sent in for a "sex film project". Then, the 40 actors selected for callbacks were introduced to each other, watched their audition tapes together, filled out a questionnaire about what they were willing to do and with whom, and underwent a week of improv. The nine primary cast members and "sextras" were chosen and underwent STD tests, and then the focus shifted to using improv workshops to develop the story for the film.

Some of the film's obstacles and issues are also discussed, among which were the CBC's objection to the casting of Canadian radio personality Sook-Yin Lee, having two key cast members drop out of the project, trying to find condoms that are "invisible", and the occasional "premature" accident.

There's a section that discusses the heavy emotional message of the film while showing a number of clips from the feature film. And then it all wraps up with the film premiering at the 2006 Cannes Film Festival. This last section is by far the weakest of the short. Other than the intertitles providing the facts, the few minutes about Cannes was mostly footage of cast and crew horsing around in their hotel rooms.

Overall... very interesting in parts, less so in other parts, a few heavy thoughts and a number of good laughs. Definitely needed some editing to tighten things up, especially the Cannes section.

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The Great American Pie Company (1935)

Mildly Amusing but Forgettable Charles 'Chic' Sale Comedy Short

21 November 2008

I saw this on TCM in the USA.

Chic plays a poor man who sells the pies his wife bakes for ten cent apiece. Although tired, hungry and in no mood for conflict, his wife sends him out to sell pies and to confront their one competitor about business. Chic reads a self-help pamphlet and decides to talk his competitor into a merger. The two "businessmen" sit down to discuss the merger, and from that point forward, the short is basically two running jokes. One... although the two men are merely vendors who peddle their pies out of a toy wagon and handbasket, they discuss their business as if it were a huge corporation poised to monopolize the industry by buying farms, mills and railroads. And two... Chic finds ways to eat his competitors pies without paying for them.

The comedy is virtually all verbal, and after the opening scene, it becomes a two man play as the two men sit under a tree and discuss business. I don't know when the first belch on screen occurred, but this short has a couple of belches thrown in as jokes at the end.

Chic is in good form, but this short is only mildly amusing...

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The Amazing Miss Cummings: An Actress at Work and Play (1977)

Film Promo which Focuses on the Precocious Child Actress

4 November 2008

I saw this short on TCM where it is occasionally played, usually in conjunction with the feature film it promotes, "The Goodbye Girl" (1977).

It's a behind the scenes promotional short that focuses entirely on the 9 year old, precocious child actress Quinn Cummings. The major cast and crew members lavish praise on Quinn for knowing the script extremely well, being easy to work with, being bright and being a natural talent. For education, Quinn is shown attending the same MGM lot school where Mary McDonald taught the famous child stars of yesteryear, like Elizabeth Taylor and Mickey Rooney. For recess, Quinn is shown being allowed to roam around unused studio lots and to play with the gadgets on those sets. Two clips of scenes from the feature film which spotlight Quinn are shown.

This short is mildly entertaining, maybe because I'm such a fan of the wonderful feature film, but it does border on being an embarrassing lovefest for Quinn. Sadly, although the precocious Quinn was absolutely wonderful in the feature film, she didn't really capture that magic again and was out of acting by her mid twenties. A cruel fate suffered by many child actors.

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Sinful Obsession (1999)

Good and Bad... Definitely a Showcase for Nikki Fritz

21 October 2008

Warning: Spoilers

This review is based on viewing the unrated 92 minute Japanese DVD (English with Japanese subtitles). IMDb currently indicates that this film is rated R (USA) for a 90 minute version, which I have trouble believing. I think there was a much shorter R rated version released initially, but judging from the other user comments, they probably also saw a longer unrated (or USA:TV-MA rated) version. The longer versions are definitely full-on softcore, not the R rated teaser stuff.

There's lots to like and dislike in this softcore flick. After viewing lots of MRG Entertainment's recent flicks which are often nothing but a handful of people sitting around a house spewing dialogue written merely to introduce inserted sex scenes, it was refreshing to go back and see one of their older flicks which actually made an attempt at being more like a real movie. This flick starts with a real song instead of the canned, reused instrumental music, and there are outdoor shots, location shots, shots inside moving cars, scenes with extras, and other things we don't see from MRG much anymore.

Plot: The basic plot (bored, unfulfilled housewife turns to working in a brothel) and the happy ending (lover becomes stalker, wife saved by husband/friend and realizes true love) have been done plenty of times before. However, the journey between the setup and climax is an unusual ride. The main character Zanthe (played by Nikki Fritz) displays symptoms of schizophrenia and other mental disorders. There are numerous instances where a whole scene or parts of a scene turn out to be a dream, a fantasy, or a full blown hallucination of Zanthe... complete with the "Gotcha!" transition. At one point in the film she appropriately says, "I gotta get a hold of myself!".

Writing: Again... kudos for attempt a real plot. Yet, there is some really bad and inconsistent writing here which had me rolling my eyes on several occasions. First, both the customers and employees of the brothel did things which would immediately get them kicked out of the place in real life (e.g. customer insisting on knowing the real full name of one of the girls). Second, there were numerous occasions where a character spoke dialogue which was completely inconsistent with things which had happened in previous scenes. Example: one guy states that "money is no object", which is evidenced by the fact that he visits a high class brothel every day, yet in a later scene he's spewing dialogue about getting dropped because he's poor. And one character seriously says, "Trust me, I'm a lawyer".

Acting: Overall, very good for a softcore flick. Nikki Fritz is very good as the unbalanced lead, and Burke Morgan is flat out excellent. Only Julia Kruis (who's always a weak actress) turns in a inconsistent performance. Everett Rodd is effectively very creepy in his role, and since I've never seen him before I don't know if he's great at playing creepy, or if his awkward delivery of lines just worked out to make it seem that way.

Sex scenes: There's around a dozen simulated sex scenes of varying lengths and quality, but most of them are good or at least average. Per usual, there's a little girl/girl, solo, threesome and voyeurism thrown in for variety. It's definitely a showcase for Nikki Fritz, who's in most of the scenes. I've always liked Nikki, both as an actress and a softcore performer, except for the overstretched, low quality fake tits. The other three girls get to participate in a couple of scenes each. Julia Kruis and Raquel Devine are both lovely and have better quality fakes. And rarely used softcore actress Dana Robbins is unbelievably cute, and natural. On the Japanese DVD, there is some light blurring of crotch shots, but it's otherwise full blown softcore.

Overall... this one has it's good and bad, but worth a watch... and a must see for Nikki Fritz fans.

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Iota (2004)

Beautifully Made and Haunting Short Film... Definitely Worth Checking Out

20 October 2008

I've seen this short on the Sundance Channel (USA) several times, and it's always a pleasure to watch again.

I don't want to say too much about the plot since I don't want to spoil anything for those who haven't seen it yet. The heart of the story is about the loving relationship between a single father and his twin daughters. However... there is another very interesting element to the story which is supernatural, though never quite slipping into horror or sci-fi, if taken literally. Or... if taken figuratively... but that's part of the beauty here... much is left to the imagination or one's interpretation.

The cinematography is gorgeous, the mostly non-verbal acting performances are wonderful, the story is interesting, sweet and yet haunting, and the quiet beautiful music sets the perfect mood.

Definitely check this short film out if you get the chance.

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This Is a Living? (1953)

Lazy and Uncreative Pete Smith Specialty... Just Stock Footage of Acrobats

19 October 2008

I saw this short on TCM.

It starts with stock footage shots of regular people punching time clocks and working in normal jobs while narrator Pete Smith reminds us that most people have normal, routine, unexciting jobs in offices, shops, and factories with scheduled hours. He then states that some people have very unusual ways of earning their living, and that he has "combed" the land and years for examples. This is a very interesting premise... unfortunately...

What Pete really meant to say was that he really only combed MGM's stock footage of circuses, carnivals and state fairs for the examples. We are shown footage of gymnastic acrobats, horseback acrobats, high wire artists, pole swayers, flying trapeze artists, a horse diver, and a diving stuntman. In fact, the only example that doesn't fall in the narrow category of aerial or gymnastic acrobat is the married couple who perform trick shots with horseshoes. While it's true that most people have routine jobs, the world has a very wide variety of people who make a living in very unusual and very different ways, but this short only shows us examples from one narrow group.

If you just want to see aerial and gymnastic acrobats, then you'll enjoy this short. However, in terms of fulfilling it's interesting premise, this short is very lazy and uncreative and inadequate, and it's most likely 100% stock footage shots. And none of Pete Smith's attempts at humor in this one are memorable.

I wonder if some poor kid saw this short in the 50's and said "Gee... my only two options in life are working a boring 9 to 5 job... or joining the circus".

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Dublin in Brass (1935)

Mildly Entertaining Yet Forgettable Musical Comedy Short

12 October 2008

I caught this musical comedy short on TCM.

A singing Irishman graduates from a cheesy Police School in Ireland and heads to New York City in order to join the NYPD, leaving his fiancée behind. He arrives on St. Patrick's Day, watches the parade, gets into some trouble, gets a couple of big surprises, and yet still finds a happy ending in an unexpected way. The plot is actually fairly thin for a two-reeler because the meat of the short is the singing and dancing numbers.

Morton Downey sings several songs, including two duets with Andrea Marsh and a fantasy production with leggy dancing girls on scooters. In between stock footage shots of the actual St. Patrick's Day parade we get some tap dancing policemen, dancing Irish ladies, and a rather amusing slapstick comedy routine from the little known Vaudeville group Smith, Rogers & Eddie. Most of the comedy in the non-musical sections is good natured fun poked at Irish Policeman stereotypes.

Personally, I'm not a fan of crooners, so I didn't care for the songs, but I thought the dancing and comedy segments were enjoyable. One's enjoyment of this short probably depends a lot on whether or not one likes old musicals in general and crooning in particular.

From the "I Didn't Know That" department... Morton Downey is the father of the late 80's trash TV talk show host Morton Downey Jr., and there's a good facial resemblance.

Overall... mildly entertaining yet forgettable...

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Goofy Movies Number Ten (1934)

Mildly Amusing Spoof of the 20's Movie Going Experience

4 October 2008

I've seen this silly short pop up on TCM a couple of times between feature films.

Pete Smith's "Goofy Movies" comedy shorts were one reel (10 minute) shorts designed to be short spoofs of the movie going experience of the day, which included getting music, a newsreel, added attractions and other things along with the feature film. In these shorts you got all those things in 10 minutes along with the humorous narration of Pete Smith. Usually, the "feature" film was a "silent" film with comedic narration added.

Oddly, in this tenth entry in the series of "whole show on one reel" shorts, the narrator is NOT Pete Smith, although he does try to mimic Pete's style. In this entry, the audience is treated to a do-it-yourself overture, a newsreel featuring various early experimental aircraft which never get off the ground, an added attraction about a bear in a fish tank, and a feature silent telling the life story of an ill-fated woman who can't catch a break in life, all accompanied by the narrator's corny jokes.

If you typically like the Pete Smith style of narration comedy seen in his numerous short films, you'll probably like this short OK. If you find his stuff corny and dated, you might want to skip this one. It's not terrible, but it's mildly amusing at best.

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Swingers Sex Party (2007 TV Movie)

Little Wraparound Story Introducing Lots of Good Quality Sex Scenes

27 September 2008

Yet another softcore flick from MRG using a little wraparound story with five people sitting around a house swapping erotic tales as a way to introduce lots of inserted sex scenes with uncredited actors and actresses. However, this is definitely one of the better ones due to the quality of the sex scenes.

Plot: Click on the plot summary link for a description. There's not really anything else to it as the plot is merely a device to introduce lots of sex scenes. It's rather short, and it's fairly easy to sit through due to relatively exciting topics like threesomes, voyeurism, etc.

Acting: Christine Nguyena and Frank Mercuri are fine in this light drama. Katrina Isis and Jack Ketchmark are below average as always. And hardcore actress (and newcomer to softcore) Kelli Brooks is kinda lousy.

Sex Scenes: The wraparound story contains three simulated sex scenes (not including a very brief bathtub solo by Kelli Brooks) using the credited actors, and these are very average. The real meat of this flick is the 15 inserted simulated sex scenes using uncredited actors. While many of the wraparound softcore flicks steal their sex scenes from old below average softcore shows (e.g. "Kama Sutra", "Bedtime Stories"), this flick uses newer (if not brand new) sex scenes that I don't recognize from a previous source. These sex scenes are consistently good or better, varied and creative, quite long, and are often more risqué than usual for softcore. I'd guess that the sex scenes in this flick take up more than 75% of the screen time.

Women: None of the three girls in the wraparound story really float my boat, but the inserted scenes were a Who's Who of 2000's softcore, including many of my favorites. I spotted TJ Hart, Monique Alexander, Angela Davies, Beverly Lynne, Nicole Sheridan, Chloe, Wendy Rice, Sryen, Brooke Hunter, and Summer Fields along with others I didn't know.

Overall... short and forgettable wraparound story that introduces lots and lots of rather good simulated sex scenes.

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Patch (2005)

Excellent, Beautiful, Haunting, Poetic but Downbeat Short Film

11 September 2008

I've watched this short film on the Sundance Channel several times now, and it gets better every time. I was initially surprised by the average IMDb rating, but after a little thought I can see reasons why this excellent short film doesn't have a better rating.

#1 - Those who see the cover art and the last name of the writer/director (Romero) and expect a horror short are certainly going to be disappointed. There's lots of haunting stuff, but it's mostly the "life is painful" type of haunting, not the "that ghost in the middle of the road is gonna kill me" kind. #2 - The filmmaker doesn't spoonfeed the story to us. He gives us all the pieces, and we have to put them together to see the whole picture. I was a little baffled at some things on my first viewing, and I didn't wholly understand the story until my third viewing. Thus, more than one viewing is recommended. The impatient, the simple-minded, and those who only see the film once are often not going to understand the story. #3 - The messages in this short film are accurate, but depressing. Those who like the philosophy of "everything happens for a reason" and "everything will work out for the best" will surely be turned off by the wise but downbeat messages here.

Much of this short is about the living dealing with the death of others, and many different angles are explored in a short time... struggling with losing a beloved spouse, even 10 years later; feeling guilty about not being close to a parent who has just died, and not reconciling before that death; feeling guilty about causing an accidental death, and for not ever having taken responsibility; and having the grief of another's death you suffered in childhood brought back up. There's also a rather bleak discussion about the fact that life doesn't turn out like we plan (as least for most of us), and death is the ultimate resolution for many issues.

My favorite thing in the film is the two main characters talking about the sense of smell in relation to memories. The woman who has just lost her mother doesn't like the fact that she can still smell her mother in the clothes because it dredges up painful memories. On the other hand, the old man who lost his beloved wife 10 years ago is deeply saddened by the fact that he can no longer smell his wife in their house or bedding or clothing after that much time has passed.

Excellent short film... haunting and poetic, both the dialogue and the music, beautiful cinematography, intelligent and well acted story.

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Sexual Heat (2007 TV Movie)

Set Your Wayback Machine to 1999... and Watch Some Sex Scenes from the TV Show "The Pleasure Zone"

10 September 2008

Yet another wraparound story softcore film with five characters sitting around a house swapping erotic tales as a way to introduce archive footage sex scenes. Oddly, MRG Entertainment is well known for using generic forgettable titles which have no connection to the softcore films; yet, this time they actually managed to work the title of the film into the dialogue as the characters actually discuss a "sexual heat" scale. Kudos for that.

Plot: Five people at a birthday gathering debate which types of relationships (one night stand, early dating, long term dating, marriage, affairs, etc.) have the hottest sex. The dialogue is mostly written to introduce the sex clips, and is rather boring. It gets a little interesting later because it is slowly revealed that Grace is an old flame of Andy's, which leads to lots of cattiness and sniping between Grace, Andy, and Andy's new girlfriend Sasha.

Acting: Sophia Lynn is pretty good as the spiteful ex-girlfriend, deftly dishing out the verbal jabs. The other four take turns stumbling over their lines, with three below average newcomers and poor Dino Bravo, who's always been a weak actor and never seems to improve.

Women: I didn't find any of the three actresses in the wraparound story very appealing. Staci Thorn has big fakes which is a turnoff, Katrina Isis is just not terribly attractive, and I'm not sure about Sophia Lynn... maybe it was her catty character that was the turnoff. I'll have to watch her in other films to decide. On the other hand, the ladies in the archive footage sex scenes were a treat... as a trip down memory lane with lots of the old favorites (Kim Dawson, Tess Broussard, Tamara Landry, Brandy Davis, etc.) from that era.

Sex Scenes: The three new simulated sex scenes in the wraparound story were kinda average or a bit better. The 18 inserted sex scenes appear to all be well chosen clips from the 1999 TV show "The Pleasure Zone", and are surprisingly good for clips from that era. There's a few stinkers, but most of them are average to good. Of course, my opinion of the women affects my attitude about the sex scenes.

Overall... kinda average, but worth a watch if you were a fan of "The Pleasure Zone".

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Disposal (2004)

Hilarious Darkly Comic Short Film with some Gorgeous Cinematography

23 August 2008

I've watched this short film on IFC several times, and it's quickly become one of my all time favorite short films.

The short starts with a well dressed city couple dragging a sleeping bag through the woods, and even though it quickly becomes obvious that the bag contains a dead body, they are discussing the husband's upcoming business trip. However, once the conversation turns back to their little problem, the mean-spirited bickering reveals an obviously neurotic couple with serious pre-existing issues. In stark contrast, there's two other people in the woods, a kind and wise middle-aged man and his inept teenage son, who's struggling with his gun safety and marksmanship during their turkey hunting trip. There's a flashback to reveal how the city couple got into their unusual predicament, and there's some long transition shots of the beautiful woods accompanied by eerie music which leads us to believe that these two pairs may be on an unfortunate collision course.

I find the scenes between the bickering city couple absolutely hilarious. The well written barbs are very mean-spirited, but very easy to laugh at because both of them are so darn unlikeable. Classic case of a couple who are their own living hell, even before the highly unusual problem they now face.

The filmmakers made a very wise decision to shoot this short film while the leaves were in full autumn color. It makes the photography of this short film amazingly colorful and gorgeous. And they took the effort to add some aerial and time elapse photography as well. None of these beautiful shots would have looked anywhere nearly as good if all the leaves had been green.

The darkly comic ending is genius... perfectly fitting the short film's theme.

Go out of your way to see this one.

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White Bitch Down (2002)

Moderatly Amusing and Darkly Comic Short Film

23 August 2008

I've seen this short film on IFC a couple of times, and I apparently enjoyed it more than most people judging by it's IMDb rating. It's not a great short, but it's enjoyable, and I can think of a lot of worse ways to blow ten minutes.

The short starts with three different middle-class people doing seemingly mundane tasks. Then we learn that these people were sent on their missions by a middle-class mother who is the confident and capable leader of this unlikely foursome. The tasks turn out to be much more unusual than expected, and they are carried out, sometimes ineptly, sometimes competently, and often humorously. Finally, the short flashes back to reveal the surprising occupation of this group and the unexpected incident which caused them to be in this predicament.

The spot that one character chooses to dump the handgun is both absolutely hilarious and ingenious. And the guy attempting to dispose of the body will get a couple of big laughs too.

If you like dark comedy, I'd suggest giving this short film a try.

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Underground (2003)

AWESOME Short Film... Try to See It BEFORE You Hear Too Much About It

23 August 2008

BUT IT'S OK TO READ THIS... NO SPOILERS HERE...

I can't believe I'm the first to comment on this terrific little short film. I've seen it on IFC a couple of times, and it has quickly become one of my favorite short films of all time.

The film starts with a white woman riding the subway system in a major city. She slowly begins to suspect that two men (one black and one middle eastern looking) are stalking her, and this fear grows as they keep appearing on the same subway cars as her. She attempts to lose them in the subway system and... hey... I said I'm not telling.

This short has virtually no dialogue by the main characters, but you won't be bored. The atmosphere is tense and keeps building, assisted by some appropriately moody music. The cinematography is also excellent, which is quite an accomplishment considering that most of it was shot in an underground subway system. Yet, the best of this wonderful short is the ending which has an important message for our modern world.

Awesome short film... both the ride and the destination (yes, those are puns).

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Voyeur's Delight (2005 TV Movie)

Boring Wraparound Story Introducing Below Average Older Sex Clips

22 August 2008

Yet another softcore film from MRG Entertainment where a few characters sit around talking as a way to introduce sex scenes which are clips from older softcore shows. This time the wraparound story idea is actually fairly clever. Four people working on a romance film debate which loves scenes should be included in the final cut of the film. Unfortunately, the diaglogue is just too darn boring with lots of talk about "what inspires passion".

The acting is uninspired. Although three of the four cast members are veterans who usually do a pretty good job, the performances seemed phoned in here as they took turns stumbling over their lines. Newcomer Brett Ryan is a painfully bad actor, and the poor guy didn't get a sex scene either.

The three simulated sex scenes in the wraparound story are good solid scenes, and I always enjoy Syren and Michelle Lay. The numerous inserted sex scenes using uncredited actors in archive footage range from poor to good, but most of them are in the fair to average range. Judging from the look and feel and actresses of those scenes, I'd guess the clips are from softcore TV shows from around 2000. The ladies are lovely, but there's not a lot of variety in the sexual activities.

Overall... boring wraparound story and below average archive sex clips make for a softcore film which is easy to skip.

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Bikini Pirates (2006 Video)

Not Funny... but Very Good Sex Scenes and Rebecca Love Rocks as Morganna the Pirate Queen

21 August 2008

Yet another, but unfortunately one of the worst of Fred Olen Ray's (aka Nicholas Medina) "Bikini" series of softcore films that stay in constant rotation on Cinemax. If you seen any of the previous films (e.g. "Bikini Round-Up", "Bikini Chain Gang"), you know what to expect. A silly but moderately amusing comic spoof of some movie genre, a cast made up from Fred's band of regulars who've found a niche, and six good solid simulated sex scenes. As always, it's a big budget (for softcore porn) film that actually has a plot, action, sets, costumes, special effects (albeit cheesy), outdoor scenes, all new footage, etc. as opposed to all those softcore films which are nothing but several actors sitting around a house talking and having sex, sometimes with archive footage slipped in.

This time out the gang is spoofing Pirate, treasure hunt and séance movies, and the real problem is that the comic writing is just not very funny. Oh, there's a handful of really funny lines, but most of the jokes fall flat, and most of the scenes that don't include the two pirates are unfunny and even boring. It might have worked better if they all had been transported back to the time of the pirates instead of the pirates showing up in the present. But they would have needed a ship (and an even bigger budget).

There's no problem with the acting. The cast is all veterans (except for Cassie Young who doesn't really have any lines), and it's not the delivery, it's the jokes that are off this time.

On the upside, Rebecca Love is awesome as Morganna the Pirate Queen. I just loved her in the pirate dress, the red hair, the dark red lipstick and speaking with the silly pirate accent. She can make me walk the plank anytime. I still hoping that Rebecca start getting bigger roles in Fred's flicks as I'm a bit tired of Nicole and Beverly.

As for the simulated sex scenes, the "Bikini" flicks always do a pretty good job, but this time the sex scenes are even better than normal, especially if you like girl on girl action or an occasional drop of hot wax on your nipples. The scenes are also quite long, which is a plus.

Overall... just not funny enough to watch, but fast forward to the sex scenes and any scene with Morganna the Pirate Queen.

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History Brought to Life (1950)

Obvious Information and Atrocious Print Quality

21 August 2008

This short film plays occasionally on TCM, and it's one of the twelve short films produced by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences (AMPAS) between 1948 and 1951 whose purpose was to promote the film industry in general. Each film discusses one particular role in film production, and this short focuses on the studio research department and their role in helping to create authentic looking and historically accurate films, especially period films.

Like the other short films of this series that I've seen, it really doesn't have anything to say that wasn't already obvious to any reasonably intelligent movie fan. Most of the film is host and narrator Cecil B. DeMille talking over film clips. He discusses how "history can be brought to life" on screen... yeah... we know that. And he discusses how the studio research department performs a lot of research to ensure that the costumes, props, sets, historical data, etc. used for a film are as accurate as possible. That's somewhat well known, and it's also not entirely accurate as we all also know that filmmakers are quite willing to dispense with accuracy in favor of entertainment value.

The worst thing about this short film is the quality of the print shown on TCM. The picture and sound quality are both atrocious, which is hard to understand since the film was made in 1951 AND it was produced by AMPAS. You'd think they'd take better care of their own stuff.

Frankly, I can't think of any reason to recommend this watching this short.

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Midway (2007)

Awesome Haunting Short Film... THIS is Why I Seek Out Short Films

20 August 2008

I've seen this short film on Cinemax a couple of times, and I have to say it's simply an awesome short film. It left more of an impression than most of the two hours films I've watched, and it reminds one that a very powerful story can be told in a short amount of time.

You can click on the plot summary link to get a short plot setup description. I certainly don't want to say any more than that and ruin it for anyone who hasn't seen it yet.

Terrific ensemble acting, beautiful black and white cinematography, intelligent, thoughtful writing, and moody music make for one excellent haunting short film. Even the sound of the wind blowing as the closing credits rolled along got to me.

Definitely seek this short film out...

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Intimate Touch (2001 TV Movie)

Cute Little Wraparound Story introducing Wall to Wall 90's Softcore Sex Clips

20 August 2008

This is another of those wraparound story with archive sex scene footage films made by Twilight Entertainment in the early 00's, along with "Indecent Disclosure" and "Insatiable Coeds" to name a couple others. Unlike the recent rash of films like this from MRG Entertainment, the wraparound story contains no sex scenes despite using a couple of actresses with softcore experience, and the wraparound story segments are always rather brief, sometimes as little as one short sentence between sex scenes. Thus, you essentially get wall to wall 90's softcore sex scenes.

Plot: Pleasant, but thread bare. Click on the plot summary link, there's nothing else to it. However, many of the inserted sex scenes from archive footage include some dialogue from the characters before and/or after the sex, and this film was well written to make the dialogue in the wraparound story match the clips being introduced. Props for that.

Acting: Very good in the wraparound story, although each actress only has to hit one note. The one credited actor in the wraparound story is actually a production assistant who gets a on screen cameo with a couple of brief lines. The acting in the inserted sex clips varies in quality.

Women: The girls in the wraparound story keep their clothes on. In the sex scenes, you get a wide variety of beautiful women.

Sex Scenes: Lots of them, ranging from poor to quite good, but most of them are in the fair to average range. And since these are all clips from 90's softcore, there's not much variety, except getting different actors/actresses. All the scenes are male/female with loud music... no oral or girl on girl or threesomes or moaning and groaning, etc. The only exception is one odd scene where there's no nudity, but the sex is rather rough and you really hear the sounds of rough sex. Also, in keeping with the theme of office sex, all the sex scenes are set in offices or other types of work environments as opposed to the typical bedroom and living room scenes.

Overall... short and sweet wraparound story introducing wall to wall below average 90's softcore sex clips.

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Carnal Cravings (2006 Video)

Good Sex Scenes, Beautiful Women, but Way Too Much Boring Relationship Babble

15 August 2008

Plot: I found the story in this softcore flick to be long and quite boring, mainly because the dialogue is all relationship talk. Even the characters in the story state that they thought they were taking a "sex class", but it turns out to be a relationship therapy workshop with lots of tiresome psychobabble.

Acting: It's an ensemble effort, and the acting ranges from fair to excellent depending upon the actor/actress and scene. I do want to give props to Monique Parent as she really nailed the part of the annoyingly effusive, perpetually perky and often preachy therapist. The scenes with her character are almost painful to sit through, but it's not bad acting, it's an accurate representation of how irritating some of those workshop leaders are in real life.

Women: I love Monique Alexander and Jassie, cute girls with natural bodies. Cytherea is also quite lovely, but she only appears in one scene. Monique Parent is one of my all-time favorites even though she's getting a bit older now. Here she's sporting a new look with a tan and a different shade of straight red hair, both of which I like, but unfortunately she is relegated to just one solo scene in terms of sex scenes. On the downside, Tyler Faith's doesn't appeal to me, especially with the fake tits, and she unfortunately get the biggest share of the sex scenes.

Sex Scenes: There's 11 simulated sex scenes and a few "teaser" scenes, and the overall quality is consistently good, nothing excellent, but nothing below average either. There's one solo scene, one threesome and one "group" scene, and the positions and sounds are nicely realistic. Seems like a lot of sex, but with the scenes averaging around three minutes, there's still way too much time left for the long, talky plot scenes in the 100 minute flick.

The porn actress Cytherea plays Mitch's wife Carly in one scene. Oddly, even though her character is identified, she is credited only as "Lovely Blonde", which is really strange because she appears to be wearing a black wig in that scene.

Overall... good sex scenes and beautiful women, but there's too much tedious relationship talk, especially in those therapy sessions. Women might like it better than me, but the guys may want to keep the fast forward button handy.

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Mother/Country (2003 TV Movie)

Ah... A Grown Child's Fruitless Search for Truth from the Parents... I Know It Well

13 August 2008

Warning: Spoilers

I've seen this short film on the Sundance Channel in the US a couple of times, and it has an intriguing premise.

Tina, a 29 year old Iranian born film director visits her mother and her birth country of Iran for the first time in 23 years. We learn that Tina's mother sent her away to be raised by her father in the West at the age of six, and one of Tina's goals in the film is to get her mother to confess to the reason of why. The first third of the film is a little dull, showing Tina's mother profess her love for her daughter over and over and over, and then showing some mundane stuff like greeting all the relatives she hasn't seen in 23 years, and playing cards with them.

The rest of the film is much more involving, with Tina desperately searching for the truth as her mother remains elusive with her answers while Tina's time in Iran grows short. Tina uses techniques other than direct discussion to try to find an answer, including having her and her mother role play each other, and using two actresses to act out their relationship while they watch and prompt the actresses with things they want to say. Yet, despite all these attempts, Tina's mother never really gives a satisfactory answer, eventually falling back on "Iranian Divorce Law" and "I wanted you to get a better education" arguments. Personally, I suspect that the answer given by Tina's grandmother is probably the closest to the truth, that when Tina's mother was getting remarried she didn't want to spoil the new marriage by bringing a child from the previous marriage.

Personally, this stuff rings true to me. When I was growing up my parents did a lot of things they would not be proud of, and years later they would deny things when they could, and make up false reasons for their actions when they could not deny them. After a couple of decades of putting their past actions out of their minds and lying to themselves about their reasons, I suspect that they probably didn't remember their true reasons. And this is a point that Tina finally makes and even states.

Tina also discusses other issues with her mother like how difficult it was to grow up without her mother, and how difficult it was to be Iranian born and grow up in the UK and USA, especially during a period when the peoples of Iran and the US truly hated and vilified each other. And finally, Tina reveals the other reason for her visit, to tell her mother in person that she is a lesbian.

Overall... a lot of human truth in a low budget short film.

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