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katehirs
Reviews
Theo Von: No Offense (2016)
In Love
I'm addicted to Theo's podcast and loved this special. I listened to the special before the podcasts and I didn't really believe the stories, but after hearing his podcasts I know most of it is true.
I sooo want to find more specials from him but I've only ever found this and the 30 Lb Bag of Hamsters.
You're the gender neutral hairstyle hitter!! Gang gang!!!
Peppermint (2018)
The worst movie of all time
Wow. "Peppermint" was so bad that I was in too much disbelief to even leave the movie theater. Did a 5th grader write this?
Two different characters said: "You're going to get dead."
All the Hispanics were drug-smuggling murderous gang members who were counting their blood money and praying to Santa Muerte in a downtown Piñata store.
Suffering from various gun and knife wounds from mowing down hundreds of brown dudes in retaliation for killing your daughter on her birthday in slow motion? No problem. A brief rest, your ghastly daughter's encouragement, a staple gun and duct tape - and you're as good as new.
After the defense lawyer tried to pay her off and the judge let the killers go and got her tased in the court room, she trained for 5 years ninja-style, learned cage fighting, and educated herself on American military grade weapons, then robbed the store that sold the said military grade weapons, and stored them in her van that she didn't even lock. Why didn't she lock the van? Because she had single-handedly scrubbed that neighborhood of crime so well that she didn't HAVE to keep the weapons behind locked doors. The sexy high-heeled FBI agent was able to just open the van door and see it chock full of weapons.
The movie is named "Peppermint" because that was the flavor of the ice cream her daughter was eating when she was murdered. The husband had chocolate, but never mind. The title for the movie never came up again before or after this.
The sassiest insult from our female lead character to the final boss is "You hit like a girl." The movie also attempted instilling some family values and comic relief when the main character mocked another rival mom for having gotten divorced, held a gun to her face, and she soiled herself.
I could go on and on and on.
I can't even.