Beach House (1977)
Antonioni Meets the Farrelly Brothers - Or Something Like That!
25 April 2002
Warning: Spoilers
CAN YOU HAVE SPOILERS IN A FILM WITH NO PLOT?

Round and round the camera goes, and where it stops... Casotto opens with a spectacular 360-degree panning shot around a deserted beach on the outskirts of Rome. At last, the camera comes to rest on a vacant beach hut where all the action will take place. At once dazzling and irrelevant, this shot sets the tone for most (nay, perhaps all) of the film that follows.

Among the holiday crowds who come to brawl and bicker on the sun-kissed sands, we have - in no special order - a man with two penises, an all-girls swimming team who strip in unison, a couple trying to have sex with third-degree sunburn, a big dog eating a small dog for lunch. The two main 'plots' (and I use this term loosely) have the wife and the mistress of a dead man trying to seduce a broker for his insurance money, and two wily old folks on the look-out for a stud to deflower their nymphet grand-daughter, played by Jodie Foster. (She's already pregnant, you see, so some poor sucker has to take the rap!) When our interest flags, director Sergio Citti treats us to a mock-Surreal dream sequence with Catherine Deneuve as a white-robed, ethereal goddess. (No argument there.) Oh, and Ninetto Davoli wanders in and out drilling peepholes in the wall - just in case anything more lurid is happening next door!

What more can I say? I laughed obligingly all the way through. I was properly impressed by Tonino delli Colli's lustrous camerawork, which overlays the rampant vulgarity with an incongruous glaze of 'class'. Years after seeing Taxi Driver, I was dumbstruck all over again at how sexually knowing Jodie Foster could be at the age of 13. (What a pity Kubrick had to film Lolita before SHE was around to do it justice!) Yet I still don't have a clue as to why Casotto was made, or what sort of twisted mind could have dreamed it up in the first place! It functions, if at all, as a tonier European warm-up for those gross-out American comedies that stormed the world 20 years later.

Antonioni meets the Farrelly Brothers, anyone? Don't all rush at once.
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