Ok, I think I figured out why this movie irked me. It's not because it's romantic--Casablanca's one of my favorite films, and so are a slew of other romance movies. It's not because it's cheesy, since I like a lot of those movies too. And it's not because it has a boring plot, because it's really not boring at all.
It's because this movie is utterly unfair towards guys. There's two major reasons for this: firstly, Bill Pullman's character is inhuman. Secondly, if the genders of the two main characters were switched (i.e., if Meg Ryan played Tom Hanks' role and vice versa), Tom Hanks (the character played by Ryan) would be perceived as a total jerk. I can't really explain these two things without mentioning spoilers, so if you haven't seen the movie, you should probably skip the rest of this commentary.
As for Pullman's character: yes, if I had a fiancee in the same situation as Meg Ryan and she wanted to dump me for someone more suitable for her, I'd say "ok." But that's not to say I'd be extremely depressed and p***ed off at how much work I put into this relationship just to have "mr. perfect" walk by and lose everything. I would also be at least a little bit disappointed that my fiancee didn't care enough about my own feelings to stay with me. Pullman's character is expecting to have kids with this woman, and he seems perfectly fine--no, downright enthusiastic--with letting her go marry someone else. I don't know any guy who would be nearly as consenting about this whole thing as Pullman's character. Additionaly, this all seems to imply (for me at least) that a heterosexual relationship has nothing to do with the guy's happiness and everything to do with the girl's: that the man is the provider of services, and the woman is the customer who has every right to leave if she's dissatisfied.
How is this the case? Well, imagine switching the genders of the two main characters. Say it was Tom Hanks who was already with a woman he was going to marry, but decided to leave her (or ask her if he could leave her) when he heard this woman (Meg Ryan) on a radio talk show who sounded absolutely perfect for him. Wouldn't Hanks be perceived as a total jerk who dumped his fiancee for someone else? Wouldn't he be seen as an insensitive person who cared more about his own feelings and happiness than his fiancee's? In the actual movie, however, it's Meg Ryan who dumps her fiancee, and since she acts cute and innocent when she does it, she's not perceived as a jerk.
So, basically, that's my chief complaint about this film. Other than that, it's very funny, and I like the acting. Another thing I didn't like about it, though, is that it's the kind of movie where you're made to only care about the two main characters and nobody else.
But ultimately I think that my main complaint about this movie is really a complaint about American dating culture. It was really hard for me to figure out why I didn't like this movie, and I think that this movie really reveals how disadvantaged the stereotype of men is in dating culture. That's not to say that women aren't disadvantaged--the whole feminist movement is the embodiment of this fact--but all I'm trying to say is that men are also disadvantaged in different ways, and in my opinion dating culture needs to change for the equality of both sexes.
It's because this movie is utterly unfair towards guys. There's two major reasons for this: firstly, Bill Pullman's character is inhuman. Secondly, if the genders of the two main characters were switched (i.e., if Meg Ryan played Tom Hanks' role and vice versa), Tom Hanks (the character played by Ryan) would be perceived as a total jerk. I can't really explain these two things without mentioning spoilers, so if you haven't seen the movie, you should probably skip the rest of this commentary.
As for Pullman's character: yes, if I had a fiancee in the same situation as Meg Ryan and she wanted to dump me for someone more suitable for her, I'd say "ok." But that's not to say I'd be extremely depressed and p***ed off at how much work I put into this relationship just to have "mr. perfect" walk by and lose everything. I would also be at least a little bit disappointed that my fiancee didn't care enough about my own feelings to stay with me. Pullman's character is expecting to have kids with this woman, and he seems perfectly fine--no, downright enthusiastic--with letting her go marry someone else. I don't know any guy who would be nearly as consenting about this whole thing as Pullman's character. Additionaly, this all seems to imply (for me at least) that a heterosexual relationship has nothing to do with the guy's happiness and everything to do with the girl's: that the man is the provider of services, and the woman is the customer who has every right to leave if she's dissatisfied.
How is this the case? Well, imagine switching the genders of the two main characters. Say it was Tom Hanks who was already with a woman he was going to marry, but decided to leave her (or ask her if he could leave her) when he heard this woman (Meg Ryan) on a radio talk show who sounded absolutely perfect for him. Wouldn't Hanks be perceived as a total jerk who dumped his fiancee for someone else? Wouldn't he be seen as an insensitive person who cared more about his own feelings and happiness than his fiancee's? In the actual movie, however, it's Meg Ryan who dumps her fiancee, and since she acts cute and innocent when she does it, she's not perceived as a jerk.
So, basically, that's my chief complaint about this film. Other than that, it's very funny, and I like the acting. Another thing I didn't like about it, though, is that it's the kind of movie where you're made to only care about the two main characters and nobody else.
But ultimately I think that my main complaint about this movie is really a complaint about American dating culture. It was really hard for me to figure out why I didn't like this movie, and I think that this movie really reveals how disadvantaged the stereotype of men is in dating culture. That's not to say that women aren't disadvantaged--the whole feminist movement is the embodiment of this fact--but all I'm trying to say is that men are also disadvantaged in different ways, and in my opinion dating culture needs to change for the equality of both sexes.