6/10
insanely complicated [the movie, not the review]
26 November 2001
From the scrolling yellow text at the start, to made-up names and languages used by the fantastic plastic aliens stuttering and mumbling through their lines, Phantom is a menace to society.

Gifted technical specs outweigh classical training in visual composition. The screen is completely saturated with details, leaving no "white space" to diffuse and compliment structured architecture. You must understand, when a person looks at a "scene" for several seconds [such as during a film], the eyeball naturally finds and gravitates to the most visually important object. Such as Leonardo DaVinci's Last Supper -- we find Jesus and stare at him, even if we're Jewish and would rather choose not to. Unfortunately in Phantom, the screen is decorated with thousands of layers of movement and color, completely disrespecting our chance within the several second allotment to focus on one spotlighted image, and saturate it into our mind.

The beginning not only has chaotic dementia in exploding every possible idea that Lucas could have accumulated in the 22 years of not directing, but dialogue and placement of action is unbelievably hard to attach emotion to. Only when we get to Anakin does some human fork prick the sterilized intergalactic muscle of wars and stars. The machines stop blocking the screen and we get the penetration of the hierarchy within the story line about Obi-Wan and Darth Vadar and such people.

From there on it is quite optimistic, bright and imaginative; a happy candyland. Beautiful places that ARE credible, for at some point you realize that you're watching 100% pure Star Wars, all done by the original creator. Not a remake of Episode IV, but something fresh and new. The spill-over concept about Vadar shouldn't surprise us, since Lucas had originally planned to make 9 movies.

Yet the special effects were more believable in Episode IV. And here we have goofy fluffy slap-stick (that was very hard to stomach). We have Ewan McGregor's haircut (that was even harder to stomach). Mechanized alien puppet faces with big lips that are only as charming as their remote control operators. Venetian cities in flat CG and perfectly choreographed sections of digital birds added to frames that didn't seem full enough. Overall it's a very child friendly affair, with token preschool-esque characters shoved in (to cover all demographics) in the form of everybody's favorite target practice -- Jar Jar Binks, or as my father calls him, that stupid horse.

But despite it all, I like sci-fi and recommend Phantom. It has its uses.
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