Review of The Item

The Item (1999)
10/10
Wildly imaginative tale about who really IS the deadliest creature...
4 December 2001
Something was tugging at mind mind to buy this when I saw this director's cut on DVD in the store. I just had this sneaking suspicion that there was a little joke being played on the unsuspecting consumer to buy a creature-on-the-loose horror flick. Yes, there is irony in the central focal point of the cover art: The eye. The summary on the back mentions "What they discover is that they have unleashed a deadly creature -- and none of them are getting out alive." Sweet irony, and you'll find out why when the film is over... I watched this and was so overjoyed at finding this true gem!

Instead of a monster on the loose cliche we are treated to an over-the-top live action comic book style thrill ride. Four felons basically have to watch over a box with a creature in it until the next morning for a "client" to pick it up and pay them. Not to worry, this doesn't involve people wandering off and getting killed off from a bloodthirsty monster. Rather, we are treated to a rather classy time of soul searching and imagination. The "monkey" as the characters call it in the film finds the holes in their lives and helps them confront and vent their emotions. That alone takes this film to a completely higher level of experience and quite frankly I have NEVER seen anything like this before -- in this style at least! It would be as if you took Eraserhead and threw in lots of guns that never run out of bullets. All the violence against the group is done by each other and definitely takes directions you wouldn't expect. As for that ending? Even director/star Dan Clark admits he leaves it up to you.

This film has it ALL: Perfect title, amazing visuals, comic book style violence a la John Woo with superficial amounts of blood, sharp dialogue, and what other film gives you (in order) a boy-boy kiss, a boy-girl kiss, a girl-girl kiss, and a girl-worm kiss! The controversial love scene at the end is actually quite restrained and and not as shocking as it appears to be when you consider the context of the moment.

Frankly, I'm astounded that so many films like...oh, say Charlie's Angels or countless others get wide release and heavy promotion and just can be forgotten so easily, but genuinely TRUE finds like The Item have to find their recognition through word of mouth and discovery on the store shelf (like I found it). Trust me, once you experience this film you will not easily forget it. Thank you Dan Clark, The Item truly is "dark outsider cinema" and WOW what a trip it was!
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