(WARNING: THE FOLLOWING OPINIONATED REVIEW BY A SMALL TOWN MOVIE FANATIC CONTAINS EXPLICIT SPOILERS) * The plot outline can be read elsewhere, and you can also find it from other user comments, so I'll just jump into some of my ideas. Tim Roth has great moments as the blood-thirsty renegade Fabre. His dialogue with young D'Artagnan during the movie's opening scene are especially entertaining. And who could forget his conversations with Cardinal Richelieu? (I'm about to butcher some quotes here, so Musketeer fans, prepare yourselves) CR: "Without killing anyone, I want you to embarrass them." F: "What if I - must kill someone?" Then the Cardinal says rather apathetically: "Well, if you must, you must." Then later in the film the Cardinal becomes angry with Fabre's exploits and Fabre says "Are you going to damn me to hell? I'm certain that's where I'm going, perhaps we can finish our conversation there?" Chilling. Francesca's threat to her incest-driven uncle about cutting off his *gonads*, and then feeding them to the pigs made woman all over the world cheer in unison, I'm sure. Steven Spiers as Porthos also gives a good performance. The physics seen in the more outlandish action sequences pulls me away from the movie, realizing it's only a movie. But in the end, it IS telling the fantastic tale of the valiant Musketeers, so see it, enjoy it, take it back before the store closes... "ONE FOR ALL! AND ALL FOR FUN!"
Review of The Musketeer
