Dante, everyone's favourite American immigrant trying to sneak into Spain has been captured! Along with his wife Oola he must try to evade the evil Rottweiler through Spain for an hour and a half. Only, Oola is never in the movie because shes raped and murdered as soon as they are discovered... oh well THAT is what the plot outline should have looked like on the back of the box. Instead it was rambling about some futuristic dog plated with metal that got loose in a prison and went on an unstoppable rampage.
Anyway, as our hero Dante is evading the prison dog, "Rot" he somehow finds himself naked and running through the woods, often turning towards the screen for no apparent to bombard you with his rugged looks. I was surprised at how long he managed to last naked, and what's more as soon as he found some clothes, they were immediately torn off and I was forced to watch one of the only scenes I've ever seen where a man is raped.
As for the dog, on the box he appears to be some kind of Terminator like robot on the cover, when in reality he's just a dog that got his mouth smashed in with a pipe, prompting him to get metallic teeth. Well, turns out the dog looks normal aside from his teeth on the outside. But on the inside, (As we see in roughly 3 hallucinations by Dante) His entire skeleton is made of extremely well polished metal (Don't ask me how he knows this, he just does). Because at the end of the movie we get to see the dog's skeleton fighting him. Now, I know this is a bit of a spoiler but It's just too amazingly pointless that I couldn't share it. At the climactic battle, the dog has its skin melted off and it's skeleton goes to fight Dante in a gigantic ring of fire. So basically, we have a metal dog skeleton fighting a character most of us probably want to lose anyway. As for who wins, well you will just have to watch the movie won't you?
It's a horrible movie no doubt about that, but it managed to keep me laughing most of the time. A feat that most bad movies have not done (Catman and Robovampire, I'm looking at you). It's pretty hard not to laugh at some parts, so I would spare it the 1/10 and give it a 2 instead.
Anyway, as our hero Dante is evading the prison dog, "Rot" he somehow finds himself naked and running through the woods, often turning towards the screen for no apparent to bombard you with his rugged looks. I was surprised at how long he managed to last naked, and what's more as soon as he found some clothes, they were immediately torn off and I was forced to watch one of the only scenes I've ever seen where a man is raped.
As for the dog, on the box he appears to be some kind of Terminator like robot on the cover, when in reality he's just a dog that got his mouth smashed in with a pipe, prompting him to get metallic teeth. Well, turns out the dog looks normal aside from his teeth on the outside. But on the inside, (As we see in roughly 3 hallucinations by Dante) His entire skeleton is made of extremely well polished metal (Don't ask me how he knows this, he just does). Because at the end of the movie we get to see the dog's skeleton fighting him. Now, I know this is a bit of a spoiler but It's just too amazingly pointless that I couldn't share it. At the climactic battle, the dog has its skin melted off and it's skeleton goes to fight Dante in a gigantic ring of fire. So basically, we have a metal dog skeleton fighting a character most of us probably want to lose anyway. As for who wins, well you will just have to watch the movie won't you?
It's a horrible movie no doubt about that, but it managed to keep me laughing most of the time. A feat that most bad movies have not done (Catman and Robovampire, I'm looking at you). It's pretty hard not to laugh at some parts, so I would spare it the 1/10 and give it a 2 instead.