Review of Nukie

Nukie (1987)
1/10
if only you were epileptic
17 January 2006
Warning: Spoilers
If, by grace of God, you were epileptic, Nukie might just trigger a seizure. This would hopefully prevent you from watching the rest of this film. There are certainly enough idiotic lens-flare light effects and crap. I saw "Nukie" as a child; my father had rented it and has since been convicted by the Hague.

From here on out, I'm not sure I can string together intelligible sentences to describe this film. It consists primarily of a disgusting little alien rushing around the desert, while his brother shrieks NUUUUUKEEEEEE approximately fourteen thousand times. Some kid gets bitten by a snake (cue stock "snake" footage). Nothing makes sense in this film. The snakebite at least limits the number of characters. These people spend their days rushing around shouting things like, "He's an alien made of PURE ENERGY!" Said alien just happens to look a bit like Grandpa, if you turned him inside-out. I can't stop crying. Even if you love campy movies, this one will break you.
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