Review of Evicted

Evicted (1999)
1/10
If you said there was a film worse than this, then you'd be making a sad insulting joke
10 February 2006
I rented this so-called film just today from Blockbuster because there's a quote on it reads that it's a cult-classic. I was badly mugged.

Cult-classic?! Yeah, if you happen to be part a cult of drugged low-life zombie-like slackers. The idea for the film seemed OK, and that intent was to make like fireworks. But the film ended up an atomic bomb.

This is the worst film that's it's ever been my displeasure to see, and I'd have to be dead to watch it again. It just looks like the makers of this cheap trash got drugged, got a camcorder, dragged Shannon Elizabeth and filmed a couple of typical stoner-slackers around exposing their pitiful existences, and other idiots they encounter; including the father of the non-crippled slacker who has a more irritating voice than Steve McFadden.

Basically the two main characters have no life; no job and basically no money. All they do is smoke, take drugs, drink beer and milk (of which the label design just have "Beer" and "Milk", which looks like they raised the money for the film by going round picking money up from the ground), go around meeting other slackers, and speak like drugged zombies . Their speechlessly mad landlord evicts them from their apartment, so the two idiots decide to throw a party in the flat on their last night there by trashing it and being really noisy in the intention of annoying the landlord. That's it, really.

I couldn't finish this film because I got so bored and repulsed watching it, so I don't know how it ends, and frankly I couldn't give a bleeding crap. Practically no script which lacks progression, very deadbeat and pretty poor acting (Shannon Elizabeth was OK) and no entertainment. In fact, you'll get more entertainment by twiddling your thumbs over and over. Yes, it's seriously that bad! The people behind this "film" should receive a life ban on making films.

Don't ever consider watching this, even if you really like Shannon Elizabeth (she only appears briefly in a few scenes, anyway). And that brings me to the fact that she is on the front cover, this is obviously very misleading and deceiving, and that they've done it just to lure people into watching this long load of rubbish. Take absolutely no notice of positive reviews or quotes made about this film to save yourself 100 minutes; even though you'll most probably give up on this film before the end, if you ever pluck up the courage to watch it as a frightful joke (and even then I'm concerned for your sanity).

WORST. MOVIE. EVER.
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