Review of Deep Freeze

Deep Freeze (2001)
2/10
Really awful in every way, shape and form
5 November 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Some people are drilling for oil in Antarctica. This has caused the continent to become unstable, and a giant chunk of it is going to fall off. It has also caused the hole in the ozone layer. Okay, first off, this is idiotic. For another thing, none of this even happens in the movie. They don't have any sort of drilling facility, they've got a pool of water. They don't have any workers, just three guys who never do anything but hang out in the cafeteria and the dorm. All we see is people walking around, standing around, and talking. They TELL us all this stuff is happening. There are also giant beetles that are supposedly dangerous. We don't see them until the last five minutes of the movie. It looks like a couple of characters are holding large turtle shells to their chests and pretending to be attacked.

As if that's not enough, the characters are annoying. The lead female goes on an tiresomely clichéd environmentalist rant about how the whole world is pretty much coming to an end because of this drilling facility. The lead male asks her what proof she has, she says none. She just knows that oil is bad. Good lord.

The only, and I mean ONLY thing worthy of note in this pile of crap is that there's a babe early in the movie who strips down to her bra. I guess she's a well-known model in Germany or something. She looks really good.

Overall this movie is just a joke. There's no plot, just people walking around telling us that things are happening, but we never see anything. If you're making a movie involving oil drilling, why build a set of a pool of water instead of an oil drilling rig? You could just have cockroaches crawling out of the hole, and later they grow, because they're prehistoric or something. There's also no blood, even though it's a movie about creatures killing people. The attacks are laughable, the characters either unnoticeable or else tediously clichéd and unlikable. There's absolutely no scares. The climax is...oh jeez. It's just like the rest of the movie: pathetic.
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