Review of Tan Lines

Tan Lines (II) (2005)
2/10
Gay boys in a yobbo surfing culture struggle to find themselves
6 February 2008
As somebody who has criticized many badly made American gay movies, I must blushingly admit that Australia has now joined the ranks of the incompetent in his field.

The premise of Tan Lines is good, if familiar, and the two boy lovers, played by Jack Baxter and Daniel O'Leary, are effective. In fact, Baxter is perfectly cast as the lovely, attractive teenager and is a reasonable actor. O'Leary is almost as good as the troubled older boy, Cass. Their love scenes are the best things in the film. In fact, without Jack Baxter the film would be a complete waste of time. You really do want him to get his man. Apart from a few good jokes, the rest is appalling. The acting rarely rises above that of a third rate amateur theatrical group.

The director Ed, continually misjudges the film's pace, relying on long shots of the surf when he should have left most of it on the cutting room floor and lifted the pace of the film. He mis-casts the brothers Cass and Dan, so that the ineptly acted younger brother Dan is 16 and looks about 23, whilst his older gay brother Cass looks about 20.

The opening shot, that of Jack Baxter asleep with his headphones on, goes on and on and on. Why? Surely it can't be so that we can have the joyous experience of listening to the crappy rock music that boys of his type seem addicted to? There are some interesting and quirky moments which in a better film would have been effective. The fact that the boy sleeps with his abandoned mother, clearly in very difficult circumstances, emphasizes the shallow life that many in the film lead. (In a nice touch we never see her, only her sleeping body buried under bedclothes.) The loony aunt of the boy's putative girlfriend (easily the most dreadful piece of acting I can recall) lives a large house almost empty of furniture. What goes on there is bizarre, and again, could have been delicious in a better film.

Sadly, Tan Lines is just a badly made, badly scripted, badly acted and overlong film. I can almost guarantee that apart from Christian Willis as the teacher, none of the cast is professional and boy does it show. The last thing this film is is a gem, or anything else of substance.
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