This was written while watching the world premier of "Ghouls".
The opening scene shows disciples performing some kind of satanic hokey-pokey beneath poor animations of flying ghosties. I smell disappointment.
Fight hateful clouds with firearms! The guns prove to be more effective when the spirits morph into Halloween costumes.
A cursed Romanian village! Here we meet the creepy brother Vladimir. Of all the Romanian names to choose from, they picked Vlad.
So far, I believe the work horse is this film's most intelligent character. We get to a tavern. Vlad's pals seem menacing. Could these be our jolly dancers from the beginning? Their cigarette smoke offers a plausible explanation as to the appearance of the "ghouls".
I can't wait to see what's in the evil trunk under the bed. But the funeral awaits! For you musicians out there, just mute this whole part.
Nothing like being spoon-fed a ridiculously boring and overdone plot line. The gore is unrealistic and hokey, but at least it's something to spice things up. Jen runs; I can't wait for her to trip over the body.
Yup: the never-before-seen monster-on-man-eating-his-flesh scene. Who among us doesn't enjoy a bloody femur now and then? Such a smart young lady to scream and draw attention to herself! Fortunately, we've got Ghoul-Hunter to save the day. Okay, so Jen isn't that brilliant: "Is this some kind of tourist prank?" She then follows the stranger down into a crypt. She just saw a man get eaten by a monster, but her biggest worry is the presence of spiders.
Good thing we have Thomas here to explain everything to us. Otherwise, we'd never get it. However, if this movie goes according to the regular Sci-Fi Original plan, he will fall in love with Jen and find a way to spare her.
I now wonder how the cloud-form-ghouls can make screechy sounds without vocal cords.
The girl races back to the inn, suddenly able to navigate the unfamiliar Romanian village. Shockingly, she is locked inside her room (with the evil trunk) by the old innkeeper. She could probably toss the nightstand through the window and escape rather than fruitlessly pound on the door, but we've already seen a few examples of her lack of ingenuity.
Liz confronts Stephan with a gun and news of a cult. No imminent demise here. I am perplexed as to why he would kill her rather than feed her to the ghouls, being the hungry bunch that they are. Error: Stephan should have blood spatter on his shirt.
After Thomas fails to save Jen from the evil brothers, I'm happy to see that Liz's corpse wasn't wasted after all. There are probably ghouls starving in Africa...
I'm quite sure that a grenade exploding under a horse would kill it. This is truly a sci-fi film when the equine (apparently named "Willy") isn't even spooked by the explosion, yet it launched the two brothers off the wagon.
Our next stop is at a church where the Last of the Druids readily informs the priest of their desire to hide out from armed Romanians and ghouls. Hopefully he's not in league with the sort of evil that has enveloped the rest of the village Thomas the Brilliant knows Jen is the vessel. But instead of killing her, he teaches her how to load his gun (and not metaphorically yet!) For having just met a couple hours earlier, love is in the air. The only question now is if he will save her before or after she's possessed by the Ghoul Queen.
A Romanian sits mounted on a horse that bears a striking resemblance to Willy, but at least now Thomas has a ride... until, of course, he is attacked by a ghoul. Knocked to the ground, Thomas mysteriously remains uneaten. Unconscious, his dead mentor advises: "You must be victorious." DUH! Meanwhile, Jen is recaptured. Daddy tried to console her with words about destiny, but Jen is not moved. To my surprise, she isn't as upset as I thought she'd be at the prospect of being possessed by an ancient ghoul queen.
A distraction! The timeless ceremony will have to be put on hold, which gives Thomas the perfect opportunity to free Jen. During one of the most dazzling fight scenes ever, Jen screams a lot which you'd think would bring back the mob. A quick stab to a ghoul, and they're free only to be recaptured.
Jen agrees to go with her father to save the one she has loved for so long (less than a day). The ghouls are quite vocal as they flutter above, and the ceremony begins.
I'm surprised to see that things got this far, but Mommy makes an appearance that gives us hope... assuming that's for a world free from flesh-eating ghosties. I hope Jen's first act as Ghoul Queen is to slay her cruel father, but she doesn't. Oh well...
After the commercial break however, we find Jen is indeed a woman scorned; she rips out Daddy's heart. That'll learn him! Thomas cannot bring himself to fulfill his life's purpose and kill Jen because she is, after all, his dear love (after just a day).
"Dammit" is all he can bear to utter as she falls on him, mostly dead. But Thomas has the power to heal (just not his own wounds). Jen awakens, and thus comes the great ending: they walk together in the woods at night.
We'll never know what was in the evil trunk. Nor will we ever know where the ghouls flew off to or what law officials will do once the myriad of half-eaten corpses are discovered in the village. However, there's an opening for "Ghouls II" since Jen and Thomas will undoubtedly spawn little half-druids.
The opening scene shows disciples performing some kind of satanic hokey-pokey beneath poor animations of flying ghosties. I smell disappointment.
Fight hateful clouds with firearms! The guns prove to be more effective when the spirits morph into Halloween costumes.
A cursed Romanian village! Here we meet the creepy brother Vladimir. Of all the Romanian names to choose from, they picked Vlad.
So far, I believe the work horse is this film's most intelligent character. We get to a tavern. Vlad's pals seem menacing. Could these be our jolly dancers from the beginning? Their cigarette smoke offers a plausible explanation as to the appearance of the "ghouls".
I can't wait to see what's in the evil trunk under the bed. But the funeral awaits! For you musicians out there, just mute this whole part.
Nothing like being spoon-fed a ridiculously boring and overdone plot line. The gore is unrealistic and hokey, but at least it's something to spice things up. Jen runs; I can't wait for her to trip over the body.
Yup: the never-before-seen monster-on-man-eating-his-flesh scene. Who among us doesn't enjoy a bloody femur now and then? Such a smart young lady to scream and draw attention to herself! Fortunately, we've got Ghoul-Hunter to save the day. Okay, so Jen isn't that brilliant: "Is this some kind of tourist prank?" She then follows the stranger down into a crypt. She just saw a man get eaten by a monster, but her biggest worry is the presence of spiders.
Good thing we have Thomas here to explain everything to us. Otherwise, we'd never get it. However, if this movie goes according to the regular Sci-Fi Original plan, he will fall in love with Jen and find a way to spare her.
I now wonder how the cloud-form-ghouls can make screechy sounds without vocal cords.
The girl races back to the inn, suddenly able to navigate the unfamiliar Romanian village. Shockingly, she is locked inside her room (with the evil trunk) by the old innkeeper. She could probably toss the nightstand through the window and escape rather than fruitlessly pound on the door, but we've already seen a few examples of her lack of ingenuity.
Liz confronts Stephan with a gun and news of a cult. No imminent demise here. I am perplexed as to why he would kill her rather than feed her to the ghouls, being the hungry bunch that they are. Error: Stephan should have blood spatter on his shirt.
After Thomas fails to save Jen from the evil brothers, I'm happy to see that Liz's corpse wasn't wasted after all. There are probably ghouls starving in Africa...
I'm quite sure that a grenade exploding under a horse would kill it. This is truly a sci-fi film when the equine (apparently named "Willy") isn't even spooked by the explosion, yet it launched the two brothers off the wagon.
Our next stop is at a church where the Last of the Druids readily informs the priest of their desire to hide out from armed Romanians and ghouls. Hopefully he's not in league with the sort of evil that has enveloped the rest of the village Thomas the Brilliant knows Jen is the vessel. But instead of killing her, he teaches her how to load his gun (and not metaphorically yet!) For having just met a couple hours earlier, love is in the air. The only question now is if he will save her before or after she's possessed by the Ghoul Queen.
A Romanian sits mounted on a horse that bears a striking resemblance to Willy, but at least now Thomas has a ride... until, of course, he is attacked by a ghoul. Knocked to the ground, Thomas mysteriously remains uneaten. Unconscious, his dead mentor advises: "You must be victorious." DUH! Meanwhile, Jen is recaptured. Daddy tried to console her with words about destiny, but Jen is not moved. To my surprise, she isn't as upset as I thought she'd be at the prospect of being possessed by an ancient ghoul queen.
A distraction! The timeless ceremony will have to be put on hold, which gives Thomas the perfect opportunity to free Jen. During one of the most dazzling fight scenes ever, Jen screams a lot which you'd think would bring back the mob. A quick stab to a ghoul, and they're free only to be recaptured.
Jen agrees to go with her father to save the one she has loved for so long (less than a day). The ghouls are quite vocal as they flutter above, and the ceremony begins.
I'm surprised to see that things got this far, but Mommy makes an appearance that gives us hope... assuming that's for a world free from flesh-eating ghosties. I hope Jen's first act as Ghoul Queen is to slay her cruel father, but she doesn't. Oh well...
After the commercial break however, we find Jen is indeed a woman scorned; she rips out Daddy's heart. That'll learn him! Thomas cannot bring himself to fulfill his life's purpose and kill Jen because she is, after all, his dear love (after just a day).
"Dammit" is all he can bear to utter as she falls on him, mostly dead. But Thomas has the power to heal (just not his own wounds). Jen awakens, and thus comes the great ending: they walk together in the woods at night.
We'll never know what was in the evil trunk. Nor will we ever know where the ghouls flew off to or what law officials will do once the myriad of half-eaten corpses are discovered in the village. However, there's an opening for "Ghouls II" since Jen and Thomas will undoubtedly spawn little half-druids.