As a self-proclaimed connoisseur of bad art, I am always on the lookout for works which fail abysmally, despite the best and courageous efforts of its producers. Never in my life have I found anything as awful/wonderful as 7th Street Theater.
Let's begin with the opening credits. The theme music is the most unabashedly sappy theme music that has ever graced the airwaves. At the same time, however, it gives the viewer the absolutely correct idea of what to expect. Ribbons of light, animated star trails, and a bell tree adorn the actors' names as a montage of short clips from the show depict the heroic actors of the 7th Street Theater. There are two fairly attractive young women who look like their response to anything in the world would be "I'll pray for you": Andi and Kelly. Two men who look like their core belief is similar: Rudy and Jamie. There is the diversity card, Hugh McLean as Gates, and the too-obese-for-television card, Travis. Oh, and then there's Joanna.
The format of every episode is exactly the same. The first segment features one of the characters with some problem. They never come straight out with the problem, however, it must be DRAGGED from them by the rest of the actors in the Theater for ten tedious minutes of television. Rudy is hardly ever a source of conflict, since he thinks every scene that is written is wonderful, and never seems to be clued into anything that is going on around him. Gates is the stock fun-loving character, so the drama almost never comes from him either. Then there's Travis. Very obese, with a horrible haircut, and almost always wearing a plain- color tee that matches his skin tone, he is a cheap and easy source of conflict. He spends 3/4 of every episode whining about something or another, and at least 3/4 of the dialog in every episode consists of the other characters consoling him and trying to get a handle on whatever issue he's having and him refusing to let it go.
By the end of the first ten minutes on-screen, anyone who has attended a nondenominational church (and became disillusioned by its naive, cloying, and generally simplistic view of Scripture and life) can predict the entire outcome of the episode. Any annoying, stupid conflict will be dragged out for 18 minutes, and it will be tied up in the most "Jesus-y" way in the last 4 minutes. Sometimes it even involves the characters refusing to take responsibility for their issues, and God magically supplying the need.
Take "A Postcard from Florida" (#41) as an example. Half the cast moved down to Florida permanently (probably because they needed to be written out of the show), and so Andi must be replaced. Who knows why no one cares about Jamie. Maybe it's because he's been replaced by "the new guy" who is so forgettable I can't even remember his name. Instead of contacting the "talent agencies" for a replacement, they just sit around and hope that God will answer their prayer and someone will magically drop from the sky. Keep in mind, they didn't want to contact the talent agency in the first place because "they wouldn't know that person very well." So the obvious solution is to just hope that some random person drops in their laps. And that's what happens at the end!! Some girl who went to Florida to join the 7th Street Theater "church plant" got the wrong audition date (God knows why she wasn't in direct communication with the theater in the first place) so couldn't be in the theater. She DRIVES UP TO MANHATTAN (who does that, by the way?), sees a show at the original 7th Street Theater, tells them her situation, and she is hired on the spot, with no audition, no resume or c.v., NOTHING. She is providentially supplied by God, so she must be good.
This episode reveals so many things about the show that are problematic. First off, do the producers expect anybody to believe that this theater is thriving in the New York City theater environment? Nothing about the atmosphere is believable. Supposedly these people are full-time, but it is clear after watching 5 minutes of the show that none of the actors portraying these actors have had any training. Every scene in every episode displays an utter lack of acting training and experience; watch the show, I don't feel the need to elaborate. Second, what is this show trying to teach people? After watching "A Postcard from Florida", I should be able to pray to God about something, sit on my a** and do nothing, and he would be obligated to supply my need. I wish the real world worked this way, but it doesn't, and I think that this attitude, which is consistently portrayed and encouraged on 7th Street Theater, is AT BEST unrealistic, and probably closer to the truth, it is utterly heretical.
I give this show a 10 because its failure is so profound. Think about it: It is a show where non-trained actors portray trained, professional actors. Scenes where the characters make judgments about other peoples' acting are hilarious, because you as the viewer have no idea what is going on until the joke is over. It's amazing that this show is still being produced, and even more amazing that the DVD of season one is $39. Think about it, I could pay $49 or so and get a season of South Park or pay $10 less and get a season of 7th Street Theater, which is NOT EVEN CLOSE in production value.
I guess they expect us to think of buying their DVDs as a charity. Or maybe Dave Christiano is really delusional enough to think that this show is worth more than a night out.
Let's begin with the opening credits. The theme music is the most unabashedly sappy theme music that has ever graced the airwaves. At the same time, however, it gives the viewer the absolutely correct idea of what to expect. Ribbons of light, animated star trails, and a bell tree adorn the actors' names as a montage of short clips from the show depict the heroic actors of the 7th Street Theater. There are two fairly attractive young women who look like their response to anything in the world would be "I'll pray for you": Andi and Kelly. Two men who look like their core belief is similar: Rudy and Jamie. There is the diversity card, Hugh McLean as Gates, and the too-obese-for-television card, Travis. Oh, and then there's Joanna.
The format of every episode is exactly the same. The first segment features one of the characters with some problem. They never come straight out with the problem, however, it must be DRAGGED from them by the rest of the actors in the Theater for ten tedious minutes of television. Rudy is hardly ever a source of conflict, since he thinks every scene that is written is wonderful, and never seems to be clued into anything that is going on around him. Gates is the stock fun-loving character, so the drama almost never comes from him either. Then there's Travis. Very obese, with a horrible haircut, and almost always wearing a plain- color tee that matches his skin tone, he is a cheap and easy source of conflict. He spends 3/4 of every episode whining about something or another, and at least 3/4 of the dialog in every episode consists of the other characters consoling him and trying to get a handle on whatever issue he's having and him refusing to let it go.
By the end of the first ten minutes on-screen, anyone who has attended a nondenominational church (and became disillusioned by its naive, cloying, and generally simplistic view of Scripture and life) can predict the entire outcome of the episode. Any annoying, stupid conflict will be dragged out for 18 minutes, and it will be tied up in the most "Jesus-y" way in the last 4 minutes. Sometimes it even involves the characters refusing to take responsibility for their issues, and God magically supplying the need.
Take "A Postcard from Florida" (#41) as an example. Half the cast moved down to Florida permanently (probably because they needed to be written out of the show), and so Andi must be replaced. Who knows why no one cares about Jamie. Maybe it's because he's been replaced by "the new guy" who is so forgettable I can't even remember his name. Instead of contacting the "talent agencies" for a replacement, they just sit around and hope that God will answer their prayer and someone will magically drop from the sky. Keep in mind, they didn't want to contact the talent agency in the first place because "they wouldn't know that person very well." So the obvious solution is to just hope that some random person drops in their laps. And that's what happens at the end!! Some girl who went to Florida to join the 7th Street Theater "church plant" got the wrong audition date (God knows why she wasn't in direct communication with the theater in the first place) so couldn't be in the theater. She DRIVES UP TO MANHATTAN (who does that, by the way?), sees a show at the original 7th Street Theater, tells them her situation, and she is hired on the spot, with no audition, no resume or c.v., NOTHING. She is providentially supplied by God, so she must be good.
This episode reveals so many things about the show that are problematic. First off, do the producers expect anybody to believe that this theater is thriving in the New York City theater environment? Nothing about the atmosphere is believable. Supposedly these people are full-time, but it is clear after watching 5 minutes of the show that none of the actors portraying these actors have had any training. Every scene in every episode displays an utter lack of acting training and experience; watch the show, I don't feel the need to elaborate. Second, what is this show trying to teach people? After watching "A Postcard from Florida", I should be able to pray to God about something, sit on my a** and do nothing, and he would be obligated to supply my need. I wish the real world worked this way, but it doesn't, and I think that this attitude, which is consistently portrayed and encouraged on 7th Street Theater, is AT BEST unrealistic, and probably closer to the truth, it is utterly heretical.
I give this show a 10 because its failure is so profound. Think about it: It is a show where non-trained actors portray trained, professional actors. Scenes where the characters make judgments about other peoples' acting are hilarious, because you as the viewer have no idea what is going on until the joke is over. It's amazing that this show is still being produced, and even more amazing that the DVD of season one is $39. Think about it, I could pay $49 or so and get a season of South Park or pay $10 less and get a season of 7th Street Theater, which is NOT EVEN CLOSE in production value.
I guess they expect us to think of buying their DVDs as a charity. Or maybe Dave Christiano is really delusional enough to think that this show is worth more than a night out.