The house on the hill seeks fresh victims. Yes, the third instalment of the much maligned Amityville series sees another gaggle of hapless buffoons venture between the four walls where, if we remember correctly from part 2 a young man slaughtered his entire family with a shotgun and the walls dripped blood. Suave wannabe writer John Baxter purchases the property for a knock down price (not surprised about that, to be honest) and moves himself and his teenage daughter in and, yep, it's not long before mysterious things start to happen: Voices, objects moving around etc etc. His daughter takes it upon herself to hold a séance with a bunch of friends, including a very young Meg Ryan, where she is informed that she is in peril. Shortly afterwards, she drowns. Or did she? Her mother swears blind that the daughter was with her moments before the alleged incident, but now she can't be found. Time to call in the psychic investigators, time to follow that pulsing light down to the basement and see what really dwells in the mysterious well. Could it be a big slimy monster? You'll have to watch it to find out but the answer is, of course, yes. It's all very run of the mill, using every horror cliché in the book, but it's not in any way terrible. It's not in any way frightening either though, but if you have an hour and twenty five minutes to kill one evening, you could do a lot worse.
Review of Amityville 3-D
