Almighty Thor (2011 TV Movie)
1/10
Ahahaha... no.
17 January 2012
Warning: Spoilers
If you haven't seen the film and wonder whether you will like it, look at it this way: the only reason this movie was made was because people might confuse the DVD for that of the Marvel film "Thor" which came out at the same time, and buy it *accidently*.

That is really all you need to know about this film.

Since I need to fill 10 lines however... well... this is possibly the worst film I have ever seen. I won't even comment on the costumes and CGI since it's obviously a low-budget film. But you don't need a lot of money to create a halfway decent story or get the mythology even remotely right. "Thor" takes a lot of liberties when it comes to this but at least in that film dead people don't go to Muspelheim (or, as the characters in this "film" pronounce it: Muscle-M) simply because it's hot there. And the Norns talk like American high school girls ("Loki will like totally destroy the world and stuff! I know, right? So messed up!"). Thor makes the same mistakes over and over again and, after millenia of being a hammer-wielding god, has to be taught to fight by a young mortal woman no older than 30. Loki spends most of his screen time wandering the streets in silence, apparently telling himself jokes in his thoughts. And the legendary hammer itself - which in the actual saga was forged by a dwarven master blacksmith - consists of a stone that is bound to a piece of wood with leather straps.

A villain without any kind of back story, a hero too dumb to tell his mouth from his rear end without assistance and a black street thug to fill the diversity requirement. What more could you ask for. Watch this film if you know a thing or two about Norse mythology and want to spend 90 minutes with a like-minded friend laughing and pointing fingers.
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