I just watched this movie because I like Kirsten Dunst. So I was able to muse about how her teeth for a American and movie star are far from perfect.This was what kept me watching and the hope that she might get her tits out for Orlando.However when our dream couple do have sex we are not allowed to see this happen.Orlando's character is so gay in this film it was most likely felt inappropriate.(I often wondered why Americans feel a need to remake classic Asian films and by doing so destroy them.)So the jerk off lost a billion not a million dollars,I care even less than Kirsten's character did.So Orlando washes his socks and next shot he is wearing them again this monumental attention to detail probably compounds the feeling that this film was cobbled together.I enjoyed Susan Saradon's tap dance class and the round of applause the audience gave her for committing career suicide.Whatever next she would drive off the end of a cliff? Oh no she has already done that.One of my brothers died of cancer last year and there was no point in this film that I recognised any of the genuine grief one experiences at a time like that in this film.He was cremated something that appears to be a big deal in this film.What shocked me most of all was that this film was made in 2005.It feels more like mid eighties.America has made many great films,the early seventies spawned some absolute classics.Now we get monumental toss like Will Smith punching an alien in Independence Day.This film fails on so many levels that if I was American I would change my nationality after watching this film it is so bad.It is amazing that somewhere along the line no one thought wait a minute none of this bullshit rings true.What I will say is I did manage to watch the whole film and for this I hope Karma rewards me.America is so in love with itself in the film that it is shameful.The only character who gets off lightly in this film is the father who has died and even he is not that believable.Shame on you America.You cannot do irony,vulgarity perfect just perfect.