3/10
One of the Worst Films of 2013 (So Far)
2 March 2013
A group of college students escape their troubled lives but only to find themselves fighting for their lives from a revenge seeking mad man.

First let me call out Lauren Palmer, who did the special effects. Not only did she do a poor (or perhaps adequate, if we are being generous) job on the effects, but then she decides to go on IMDb, rate the film a 10 and review it as having the best special effects. Really mature, Ms. Palmer. You could have had your friends write rave reviews, but instead you went out and did it yourself. I may as well just title this review "the best review ever" (when, in fact, I know it will only be adequate).

Next, I will have to say that the use of Clint Howard was either genius or foolish. Genius because it caught the attention of horror fans who have loved him in many films ("Ticks", "Ice Cream Man") and may get them to give this one a try. Foolish because he has roughly 30 seconds as a doctor, which is a throwaway role. Make him memorable. Even if you only have him on set one day, do not have him deliver pointless dialogue that any extra could have done.

Apparently, Victor Miller was of some guidance on this film. And that makes sense, because the direct inspiration is obviously "Friday the 13th" (young adults go in the woods and get killed). But what could Miller have possibly suggested? Did he advise them to throw in a newer version of Crazy Ralph? There is nothing in here that could not have been thought up and written in fifteen minutes.

The film even has a special thanks for such people as Edgar Wright, Stanley Kubrick, Quentin Tarantino... which is insulting to those great directors. There is a difference between "I watch Kubrick movies" and "I am influenced by Kubrick movies", and clearly the difference is lost on these folks. If you have seen everything Kubrick ever made and still cannot have one original (or even inventive) camera shot, you were not influenced and Kubrick does not need your thanks.

The marketing on this one was smart. The Last Reel (a little-known blog) is quoted as saying it is a "solid scare that's worth the trip". But they also wrote that "some of these characters (sic) were underwritten and it seemed as though their sole purpose (sic) was just to up the body count." Poor spelling aside (and that shows how hard they had to look for a positive review), this is a key point. The only interesting character in the whole film is Jared, whose background is never explored... he is just the weird guy with too little screen time. The actor, Chris Ready, also appeared in the better independent horror film (despite the bad title) "Bloodlust Zombies".

Dread Central -- a respected name in horror -- says the film is "an homage to some of the great slasher films of the 70s and 80s." In fact, their review is quite positive down the line, only really taking issue with the editing. They gave it 3 out of 5. I have to strongly disagree with them on this and wonder what movie they were watching. I especially take issue with the claim that director Jason Christopher did "an admirable job of creating a compelling, straightforward look at the torment of one man and how it manifests through his murderous acts". His daughter was hit by a drunk driver -- while she was playing in the road in front of her inattentive father. I get that he is in pain, but how do we feel sympathy when he murders people without justification? Mrs. Voorhees at least had a specific target demographic...

I hate to be rude to young filmmakers, but there is a glut of independent film in this world, and independent horror in particular. Some of it (such as John Pata's "Dead Weight") is among the best out there. And then there is this film... no original idea, no decent acting, no decent plot, poor lighting, characters I give less than two figs about... how it found a distributor is beyond me.
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