Evil Dead (2013)
2/10
At least 10 stupid things about this movie...
12 April 2013
Warning: Spoilers
There are definitely more but here is at least 10...

1- After the nurse says that they've done this before with Mia and they know she will do anything to get away, no one thinks to hide the vehicles keys in a safe place? Probably even left them in the ignition too because it looked as though she just jumped into the car and hightailed it out of there.

Stupid.

2- They have a crack addict with withdrawal symptoms and who's mother was mentally unstable roaming about in the cabin, but they leave a shotgun and shells they found in the cellar lying around?

Stupid.

3- They find a cellar with dead cats, an ominous book, blood all around and a shotgun with shells and they don't think to head back and notify the authorities that there might have been a possible crime that took place there? Thinking to themselves, "That's o.k., we're here to help Mia so who cares if there might have been a murder in this cabin."

Stupid.

4- The Evil needed 5 souls to manifest itself, but I only count three or four at the most. The girl at the beginning doesn't count because the Evil was put back in hell, if it wasn't, Eric wouldn't have needed to read a passage in the book to release it once more now would he? The dog was killed by Mia with the hammer, it was never possessed. And if it were possible to possess animals, then why not just possess a bunch of forest animals instead to get his 5 souls?

So that's three souls from the moment the evil was released by the incantation, Olivia, Natalie and Eric. Mia? No, her soul was returned to her body or she wouldn't have been alive at the end to fight the abomination. I'll be generous and give you David as well since he died in the cabin fire with the others, but this nonsense I'm reading about the Evil getting Mia's soul and then loosing it counting as a soul claimed, that's bull. In order to claim something you have to keep it. Finders keepers, losers weepers.

Stupid.

5- After the cabin door opens with wind gushing through the cabin, and Mia telling everyone (in a demonic type voice) that they are all going to die, the nurse and girlfriend going bat-sh!t crazy, his sister ending up in the cellar with demonic eyes and all the sh!t going on around him, David still comes up with "Maybe she got infected by the dead cats and passed it on to the others, or better yet, maybe she's just crazy like our mom was in the asylum. I mean, come on, there's denial and then there's just plain stupidity.

Stupid.

6- David buries Mia, then pulls her out of the ground and she's miraculously healed? In the original, the deadites were never healed, they just gave the illusion of being "OK" to further torment Ash. And before any of you say "We'll Ash was healed after he was turned into Evil Ash" let me point out that this was in ED2 which was a fantasy mixed with humour type horror movie. Fans of this keep insisting this one is a more realistic approach like Raimi envisioned in the first place. Now you have a choice to make guys, you can't have it both ways. It's either a more realistic approach in which case Mia should still have cuts and burns on her body or it's a fantasy based horror where anything goes. Which is it?

Stupid.

7- Every time something bad was going to happen, wind would blow the pages of the book to an illustration depicting what was going to happen giving the audience a heads up. Great way to build suspense there Fede. Wow!

Stupid.

8- After Mia boils her skin in the shower, the "nurse", finally gives in and says "Her burns are too severe we have to get her to a hospital." So, David takes Mia with him, in the only vehicle left I might add, just the two of them leaving the three others (girlfriend included) alone in a creepy cabin in the woods in the middle of the night where strange satanic rituals might have happened in the cellar. Last time I checked, there's room enough for five in a jeep. He could have at least taken the nurse with him in case Mia's condition worsened on their way to the hospital.

Stupid.

9- The abomination, with enough power in it's scrawny little arms to topple a jeep, had difficulty dragging itself on the ground after Mia amputated it's feet with the chainsaw. If it had as much power in it's arms as was shown, it should have easily been capable of doing a hand stand using it's arms to walk to get at her. Imagine for a second, how freaking' creepy it would have been to see that coming at her from around the jeep upside down. It would have been something like the creatures in the Dead Space video game. Missed opportunity there Fede.

Stupid.

10- Mia starts walking off into the morning sun with her arm cut off and shoved into her shirt, without even cauterizing the wound. I give her 15 minutes before she bleeds out and dies on the side of the road. Even if she makes it that far, she still has to swim across the river that washed out the road earlier in the movie. She'd never make it with all the blood loss, she would pass out and drown in the river.

Stupid ending.
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