Review of Crossbones

Crossbones (2014)
8/10
Thoroughly enjoyable
7 November 2014
Thoroughly enjoyed this pirate saga that has many of the elements of "Pirates of the Caribbean": beautiful shots of exotic Caribbean locales, swordplay, and the kind of plot twists that come from a pair of mischievous Jack Sparrowish characters who both possess a near-endless capacity for on the fly.

In one ring, we have Blackbeard (John Malkovich), who in this alternate take on history, faked his death and is now living large as a semi-peaceful ruler of an off-the-grid pirate kingdom of his own making. His main foil is combination doctor/spy/ tactician/lover Tom Lowe (Richard Coyle) who is originally sent to expose/kill Blackbeard but ends up in an uneasy alliance with the semi-erratic despot. There's also a love triangle between Lowe, free-spirited quartermaster Kate Balfour (I could easily write another paragraph about how enchanting Claire Foy is here) and her handicapped husband (Peter Stebbings).

As for the "Pirates of the Caribbean" comparison (a compare/contrast angle is inevitable considering that is the only other pirate film I have seen), this isn't the movies but an NBC show that's relegated to the summer schedule (AKA low-key filler) so adjust your expectations accordingly. It is worth pointing out, however, that while Johnny Depp anchored the Pirates series with a meticulously crafted iconic comic character in Jack Sparrow Jon Malkovich's humor is unintentional: His interpretation of Blackbeard's accent is suspiciously Malkovich-like (worth mentioning other than the accent, Malkovich is fine here). But hey, written history can only tell us so much about the accents of 18th Century pirates. Maybe Blackbeard did sound like John Malkovich?
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