Who's Your Daddy? (2002 Video)
4/10
poor baby Marnette Patterson as bad girl again!
8 February 2015
Movie starts off extremely well with that glorious sequence featuring the lovely girl from CHARMED's final season, Marnette Patterson. Then, almost instantly, it switches over, from the sublime to the ridiculous, with campy ol' Colleen Camp as the mother of Chris in embarrassing scenes no guy would want to see. If I was a film director and I had Marnette Patterson on the set, I wouldn't have bothered with such stupid fart jokes and vomit references and gay porn and lots of other inane stuff too lame to mention. Poor little Marne seems to have been typecast in the 'bad girl' role, and while she clearly excels at it, what a waste. She was too late for BEVERLY HILLS 90210, where she would have made the 100% ideal Kelly Taylor, and too early for 90210. I'm just saying that while this movie has funny moments, and the fantasy of inheriting Playboy/Heaven is a story-line worth pursuing, a deluge of toilet humor is not the way to go about it. Besides Marnette, they also got it right with (1) Ali Landry as the classy Angel (although the character shouldn't have been quite SUCH a goodie-goodie two-shoes Sunday school teacher, but okay, Ali Landry, classy, sexy, hot, yum, yes (2) the J.Geils Band with CENTERFOLD (which is from an era preceding this shot-in-2002 movie by twenty years, but sounds as if it was created for this movie) (3) the Hawaiian Tropic girls, who unfortunately get way,way too little screen- time.

But the flops far outnumber the bright points. Please, what were they thinking casting Patsy Kensit as an Angel? The second half, especially, throws the little that they did have, completely away by rushing towards an agreeable end. And listen here, a magazine like Heaven cannot overnight change its content without disastrous consequences for its sales department, so don't think that those group shots taken of friends would get the mags sold, so it's all a pointless unbelievable shoddy solution turning Heaven feminist- friendly, very badly scripted.

A movie that missed its target audience by miles and miles. Guys looking for fun, would rent it, and unlike me, they wouldn't sit there and rave about Marnette Patterson afterward. No, they would want to tar and feather the people who created this (mostly) junk and cheated them out of their video rental lolly.

Should have been more Marne and Ali, less fat vomit-prone & nerdy geek guys. Movie needed a miracle that could never be anything more than a mirage.

And now, enough from me, I'm off on my date with Marnette... I wish.
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