1/10
This movie is a miracle
28 February 2016
Warning: Spoilers
I mean movies this bad don't just happen they have to be forged in disinterests, recorded with apathy, filmed in boredom. It is super hard to appreciate just how bad this film without viewing it. The movie begins with us seeing a cat (not the one on the cover, a different cat) The story follows two families who are having mundane and stupid problems that even they seem to be having a hard time conveying emotions about. The first family features a fat slob who lives in a house that has so many tacky ornaments it makes peewee's play house look classy. He seems to be reaching out to his son who , rejects him? by responding to him passive aggressively. Eventually the cat shows up and neither immediately react to the cat other then acknowledging it is there . The boy we find out is an English major which he clearly demonstrated his mastery of the language to a girl he is interested in? by using some very witty words. After this we meet the next family... which had a mother who selfishly deprives her daughter encouragement with her career instead being more obsessed with her own job. She encourages her son despite his lack of faith in himself (or the movie I hope) . Some more stuff happens with both families, the daughter it turns out is looking at a website by the guy from the beginning. After all the back story is set up the cat begins talking to each one of them explaining he can only talk to them once (because why not?) and gives them the one thing they need to do in his plan to unite the families. Eventually the families meet and they seem to be moving forward (I guess, it looks more to me like they missed the part about showing emotion or being believable, I mean if the pod people were this bland... the invasion would never have gotten anywhere). The girl begins realizing that this creepy older guy can help her career so that ambition about college won't be needed (cause who doesn't want to work for a creepy guy you just met?) She goes off with him to make cheese puffs for her mom (which her mom demanded she do and grounded her for not making them) While away her mother abandons her business meeting to go look for her and her son who went over to the house and met creepy web guys son and they went "swimming together" The mother proceeds to make a huge scene... the cat realizes this stuff is getting bad so he decides to step in again... only to get hit by a car... the two families then come together "The cat talked to you?! Are you all crazy? "Yes" to get his old collar and put it on him and a magic dander orb flies off his fur after it begins illuminating a bright gold color. "What happened?" "We did something"... immortal words. At the end we get credits and see the actors who all appeared in some scenes of them (I'm sure they all wished the audience wasn't reminded of them or given their actual names) finally we get to the end and find that the cat who was name Duffy in the movie was actually named squeaky... I don't want to complain to much about this but if you're going to change the cats name.... why Duffy?

Anyway there are a lot of problems with the movie.... it for instance could be a 1/3 the length and have a more coherent and easy to follow story. 2.... rules like "The cat can only have one conversation with the person are kind constricting... almost limiting anything interesting transpiring (actually after watching it it absolutely limits it here as nothing interesting happens) Another fun thing in the film is the fact that the movie goes out of its ways to show just how stupid the writers are... as they know about as much about computers, fine arts, theater, and Humphrey Bogart as an actual cat does... but in the actual cats defense, it doesn't care. This coupled with horrible background music, establishing shots they probably got from a selection of stock footage make for something so bizarre and uninteresting it need to be seen to be believed. I watched this movie and honestly I have no idea what in the world happened. I don't know who thought this movie needed to be made, but I'm glad they did... cause it beautifully illustrates almost every mistake one can make making a low budget direct to video movie.
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