The Congress (2013)
1/10
Prolly the worst movie I've watched in the past 2 years.
16 November 2016
Warning: Spoilers
This was awful. Truly awful.

The first act is 45 minutes long and is paced slower than coal turning into diamonds. None of the characters are believable at all, though some of the actors do give typically decent performances, particularly Harvey Keitel. Every character, in addition to not being believable, is loathsome. I didn't care about anyone and actively hated a few that I was supposed to sympathetic to.

The second act was painful to watch. The animated parts weren't even interesting. For one, the concept of an "animated zone" was unbelievably stupid. Why would anyone do that in the first place, set something up where you've essentially taken LSD but somehow have to function as if you have not? The first scene where she's driving her car and the desert turns into an ocean and she finally goes over a cliff, for instance, was ludicrous; people would be dead. Then, she's already seeing herself and everything around her as a cartoon, but for some reason the tap water contains ANOTHER hallucinogenic drug??? It was also inexplicable to me why they mostly stuck with a pastiche of classic 1930s-50s style cartoon art, and even that wasn't done well.

The third act and the ending were beyond terrible. I spent 2 hours watching this and at the end had no resolution whatsoever beyond the real world being a terrible place, terrible people getting what they want at everyone else's expense, and our protagonist being significantly worse off than she was when the movie started.

I couldn't even tell you what themes they were trying to explore. There was no examination of the nature of reality, no look at what it means to be human, no exploration of how we trust our senses... nothing at all.

A better movie with a similar subject (the digitizing of actors) was made way back in 1981. Looker is a flawed and dated film, but it is at least engaging: there is conflict, the characters have real motivations. And not least, there is a resolution to the story beyond the story just ending.

If you and your wife were 2 of 13,000 that saw this film, I'd guess that you were 2 of 13,000 that enjoyed the experience; The Congress was execrable IMO. In fact, it was so bad that I consider it a public service to warn people away from it.

DO NOT WATCH!

Zero stars; zero thumbs up.
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