Armageddon (1998)
7/10
Great cast with tons of energy
8 July 2019
Believe it or not, I managed to escape the 1990s without sitting through Armageddon. I'm notoriously squeamish about "we're all going to die!" movies, so the only reason I did sit through it was because it was Bruce Willis's week on Hot Toasty Rag. Thankfully, my mom prepped me for it and told me everything that happened so I wouldn't be too scared or sad. So, if you're squeamish like me, and you want to watch it anyway, just ask your mom how it ends.

He must have been busy, or didn't want to seem old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter, but the leading role Bruce Willis took on seemed tailor-made for Kevin Costner. Bruce held his own and wound up making a certain scene one of the most iconic scenes to come out of the '90s. He plays a gruff, tough oil driller with a soft spot for his daughter, Liv Tyler. Liv, raised around gruff, tough friends of her dad, has fallen in love with one of them, and her dad's not happy about it. Liv and Ben Affleck's romance seems a little unimportant when Bruce and his entire crew are called to NASA to save the world.

Sure, I'm not a fan of the premise of the movie-a giant asteroid heading for Earth isn't my idea of a good time-but the cast is so delightful it makes everything worth it. Everyone has tons of energy and brings their own presence to the screen. Bruce had his classic combination of machoism mixed with being a softie on the inside. His fellow drillers-turned-astronauts are an eclectic group impossible to dislike. Steve Buscemi has a weakness for women, and his antics are hilarious and remarkably charming. Will Patton has a broken homelife, and he's given a touching scene the night before the rescue mission to reconcile with his family. Michael Clarke Duncan, Owen Wilson, and Ken Campbell aren't really given anything to do besides rattle off one-liners, but the one-liners are funny, so I don't think anyone will complain. Back at NASA, the head of the program and mission is Billy Bob Thornton, and he always brings a little something special to his roles. Keith David, a head honcho from Washington, brings tension and severity to the plot, and Jason Isaacs plays a scientist with good intentions.

When Bruce's group is brought to NASA, they have to go through a mini-boot camp to make sure they're physically able to undergo the mission. It's a very funny sequence, started by William Fichtner, who plays the only certified astronaut on the mission, quipping, "Talk about the wrong stuff!" when he sees the odd lineup. Bill has a great, meaty role, and he's completely believable as a disciplined, intelligent patriot who's scared yet confident. Peter Stormare puts on yet another accent, Russian this time, and plays a quirky astronaut who's been stationed in space for too long at the expense of his social skills. There are plenty of comic reliefs in this movie, Peter included, to even out the immense tension of the plot. Even though you'll be worrying about the end of the world, you'll be laughing through your fear.

Since this is a Michael Bay movie, you can expect overactive camera angles and tons of special effects. The opening sequence is incredible, even when watching it twenty years later, as a meteor shower destroys New York City. There's a lot to appreciate in this movie, with the push and pull of the characters, everyone's special quirks and motivations, and the Oscar-nominated song, "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing." The romance between Liv and Ben is really the only downside; it's supposed to be true love and more powerful than the end of the Earth, but it feels like a summer fling between two teenagers. Liv is given many tearjerker scenes throughout the movie, and since she was only twenty years old during the filming, I decided to cut her some slack. I remember the difficulties of being a young actress and how sometimes the emotions you think are being projected in front of the camera don't end up coming across very well. So, when you watch her scenes and she's supposed to be crying over the danger her boyfriend and father are in, keep her age in mind and be kind.

To call yourself a true '90s kid, you'll probably want to rent this movie. You'll probably have a good cry during the credits, but if you like these "we're all going to die!" movies, you'll probably enjoy yourself during the process. Go ahead and bring your Kleenexes, and enjoy what this very large cast brings to the screen.

DLM Warning: If you suffer from vertigo or dizzy spells, like my mom does, this movie will not be your friend. Since I counted 66 spinning camera shots and 13 canted angles, as well as 4 scenes with strobelights and 6 scenes with a severe shaky camera, you should be aware that this movie could make you seriously sick. In other words, "Don't Look, Mom!"

Kiddy Warning: Obviously, you have control over your own children. However, since this is an "end of the world" movie, I'd wait until my kids were a little older until they watch it.
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