Pet Sematary (2019)
2/10
A Dud That Should Be Buried
24 August 2020
I respect the movie makers to attempt to make this their own. But what it ends up doing is turning it into something of a hybrid slasher to zombie flick. Or perhaps it was always a zombie flick. The problem stems from very bland characters. Jason Clarke, who is normally a fascinating guy, seems so bored from the material. His dead expression doesn't translate as "burned-out big city doctor" but just burned out (perhaps from his recent slew of projects he's involved in). Also, none of it was scary. To be fair. The original adaption wasn't that scary either. This version felt even less about the deep loss and more about how to connect the dots. For instance, the procession of children who hold a ritual burial for a deceased pet. Okay, where did that ever go. And what happened to those kids? Did this line of plot ever come back? No. Only to be creepy...ish. As a friend once said "seemed filmed just for the trailer."

The source material has always had a major flaw. In a way, we sort of know that death will come and it will involve resurrection. Okay...so? We've seen this already. What I feel the story lacks is a LOT of character building. Since the most interesting character background is actually the mom Rachel (Amy Seimetz) who isn't remotely absorbing everything that is actually happening. Or it happens too late. To be fair, Denise Crosby wasn't exactly hitting it out of the park either. But we do get to see a relationship with the sister whom she is haunted by.

And this review obviously wouldn't be complete without comparing Juds. There is a presence around Fred Gwynne that NO ONE will ever touch. And, in a lot of ways, that is probably the most egregious reason as to why this remake should not have been done. I believe the makers of this didn't consider the absolute iconic nature of Gwynne's performance. While hammy and sometimes ridiculous Maine accent, he sold it. For some reason John Lithgow seemed lethargic and at some points...confused. He embeds himself in the family in a very unnatural way. And there is nothing particularly interesting about him that makes Ellie (Jete Laurence) find fascinating. Other than they needed to get that out of the way fast. Lithgow's gruff approach doesn't add the warmth that Gwynne provided. FInally, when all Hell breaks loose in the movie, I just didn't feel it was worth the time. Look, it's damn near impossible to scare people anymore. The "secret" change that is involved here isn't that mind blowing as it thinks it should be. It just makes you feel the gimmick more. The 1989 movie wasn't great shakes, but at least it got really tragic fast. And you felt the loss more. Emoting to get the audience to emote DOES NOT WORK. And definitely doesn't work when one of your better assets becomes the one thing they have to destroy. Ugh.

It's just a movie that really makes you wonder why it was even made.
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