Series 9 Episode 4
Arthur and Ray attend a motor trade dinner. Arthur is tasked with rigging the raffle so the guest speaker, Billy Mortimer, a former footballer, wins. Arthur is asked by a business associate, Sid, if he still wants to buy a new Jaguar and is informed of a small company, Good Time Motors, selling one. Arthur phones Dave at the Winchester and asks him to call the manager, Tony, and put Arthur's name forward as a possible buyer.
The following day Arthur and Ray are selling red lightbulbs in a restaurant in Chinatown. When Arthur and Ray leave Arthur has Ray meet him in an hour, but doesn't mention where he is going. An hour later Ray sees Arthur exiting a door on a side street. Once Arthur has walked away Ray looks at the names on the buildings intercom. Ray picks Arthur up but he is vague about what he was doing. They look for Good Time Motors but can't find it.
Sid comes to the car lot. Ray goes to fetch Arthur from the office when he looks through the window and sees Arthur performing some strange exercises with his arms and mouth. Ray opens the door and Arthur instantly stops and acts defensive. Sid shows them a big dent at the rear of his car and tells them he hit a lamppost that has a preservation order and the council says he has to replace it. He tells Arthur it is a special lamppost with an octagonal head, and money is no object. Arthur says he will see what he can do.
Ray tells Arthur he will take the lightbulbs to Chinatown and notes Arthur has been behaving strangely. Arthur claims he is fine, will deliver the lightbulbs and meet Ray at the Winchester. Arthur is driving at night time. He stops to look at a lamppost, is approached by a woman asking if she can do anything for him and then three policemen approach him. One trips over Arthur's foot and hits the ground whilst the other two arrest him for assaulting a police officer and contravening the sexual offenses act.
Later, Arthur is in a holding cell. When a policeman comes to get Arthur he calls him "the curb crawler." Arthur speaks with the two arresting officers, Tomkins and Reed. They tell Arthur they can't get hold of his wife at home and they found boxes of red lightbulbs in the back of his car.
At the Winchester Ray receives a phone call about Arthur. Arthur is charged with assaulting a police officer during arrest and solicitation for prostitution. Ray picks Arthur up from the police station. At the Winchester Arthur explains the situation to Ray and Dave, telling them he got out of his car to check a lamppost then thought he was being mugged. Then a policeman tripped over his foot and he is being charged with assault.
Arthur and Ray go to see a solicitor, Lockwood, who tells them Arthur is going to be charged on three counts. Lockwood tells Arthur a Jaguar was seen driving around the area. Ray says they were looking for Good Time Motors. Lockwood tells them it would be useful for their defence if they could find the owner.
Arthur goes to the hospital to have his foot examined and is told he has a badly sprained Achilles tendon and is temporarily in a wheelchair.
Tomkins and Reed go to see Morley and Field to inform them about Arthur. Morley laughs at the charges and tells them they have the wrong man. Tomkins and Morley both explain to their respective partners they have known each other for years.
Arthur, Ray and Lockwood arrive at the police station. Arthur is in his wheelchair. Arthur gets into an ID line up. An old woman with a walking stick is brought in and asked if she recognises any of the men. She ID's Arthur and says he asked her if she wanted a good time in his motor, but Arthur states he was asking for Good Time Motors. As Arthur leaves the police station, Lockwood tells Arthur things aren't looking good.
Later Ray sees Arthur again leaving the door up the side street. Ray notices Tomkins and Reed are following Arthur and sees them approach the door, looking at the intercom and taking notes. At the lock-up Ray hears Arthur making strange vocal noises in his office. Sid arrives to cancel his order for the lamppost. Arthur asks him to be a witness for him and to mention Good Time Motors. Sid declines, saying it will ruin his business.
Lockwood goes to see Morley and Field, summoning them to give evidence on Arthur's behalf.
Ray and Dave arrive at the lock-up. They sees Arthur practising some strange vocal exercises in his office. Dave tells Arthur they have arranged a big night out for a meal after his trial. And if Arthur gets sent to prison Dave gets his deposit back, so it's a win-win.
Lockwood appeals to Arthur to change his mind about defending himself. Arthur tells Lockwood they still can't find Good Time Motors. Lockwood also mentions the mysterious visits Arthur has been making, and not telling anyone what they are about. Arthur demands privacy. Ray continues to look for Good Time Motors.
Arthur visits Morley and Field. Arthur wants to go over his questions for the trial. Morley refuses and tells Arthur they are only doing it as they are being forced. Arthur tells them he will have to treat them as hostile witnesses. Morley angrily tells him not to be so stupid as they are Arthur's witnesses.
In court, Tomkins is giving evidence, saying they saw Arthur driving around the area.
Ray enters a workshop with the title "Simpsons Antiques" above the door. A man is inside and Ray tells him he is looking for someone called Tony at Good Time Motors. The man confirms he is Tony, but never got around to changing the sign outside.
In court Tomkins tells the prosecuting counsel that they have been unable to locate Good Time Motors. Ray brings Tony to court to give evidence. Lockwood informs Arthur. Ray goes to Arthur's secret meeting place. Tomkins states Arthur was seen leaving a building in soho that has unemployed prostitutes living there. Ray is in a taxi with a flamboyantly dressed man, Ashley.
Arthur calls the Chinese restaurant owners as witnesses. Outside the courtroom Dave and Tony wait with Field and an agitated Morley. On the witness stand Arthur asks Dave about Good Time Motors. Dave says he tried calling them about a dozen times. Ray and Ashley arrive at court. Morley rants at Ray. Arthur panics when he sees Ashley, who has come to give evidence on Arthur's behalf. Arthur refuses to call Ashley as a witness. He calls Tony, who confirms he was selling a Jaguar, like Arthur's, and had been driving it around the area for a few days before Arthur was arrested.
Ashley is called as witness. Arthur jumps out of his wheelchair to yell at Ray, then claims it is a sign he is able to walk again. Morley still waits to be called, telling Ray he will destroy Arthur when he is on the stand. Ashley gives evidence and says he gives private speech lessons and Arthur has been a student of his for five weeks. When Arthur is asked why he didn't reveal this evidence to help his case Ashley says he asked Arthur to keep his teaching quiet, as a once famous actor he was now making a living teaching. When Arthur met him he recognised him immediately and Ashley begged him to keep his identity secret for fear of publicity and ridicule. Arthur agreed, but Ashley was only too happy to help when Ray came to see him to explain Arthur's situation. The case is dismissed. Ray asks Arthur why he was having speaking lessons. Arthur says if former footballers like Billy Mortimer can make £500 per night for a speaking engagement then so can he.
Arthur and Ray leave court. Morley is still impatiently waiting to be called as a witness.
Arthur and Ray attend a motor trade dinner. Arthur is tasked with rigging the raffle so the guest speaker, Billy Mortimer, a former footballer, wins. Arthur is asked by a business associate, Sid, if he still wants to buy a new Jaguar and is informed of a small company, Good Time Motors, selling one. Arthur phones Dave at the Winchester and asks him to call the manager, Tony, and put Arthur's name forward as a possible buyer.
The following day Arthur and Ray are selling red lightbulbs in a restaurant in Chinatown. When Arthur and Ray leave Arthur has Ray meet him in an hour, but doesn't mention where he is going. An hour later Ray sees Arthur exiting a door on a side street. Once Arthur has walked away Ray looks at the names on the buildings intercom. Ray picks Arthur up but he is vague about what he was doing. They look for Good Time Motors but can't find it.
Sid comes to the car lot. Ray goes to fetch Arthur from the office when he looks through the window and sees Arthur performing some strange exercises with his arms and mouth. Ray opens the door and Arthur instantly stops and acts defensive. Sid shows them a big dent at the rear of his car and tells them he hit a lamppost that has a preservation order and the council says he has to replace it. He tells Arthur it is a special lamppost with an octagonal head, and money is no object. Arthur says he will see what he can do.
Ray tells Arthur he will take the lightbulbs to Chinatown and notes Arthur has been behaving strangely. Arthur claims he is fine, will deliver the lightbulbs and meet Ray at the Winchester. Arthur is driving at night time. He stops to look at a lamppost, is approached by a woman asking if she can do anything for him and then three policemen approach him. One trips over Arthur's foot and hits the ground whilst the other two arrest him for assaulting a police officer and contravening the sexual offenses act.
Later, Arthur is in a holding cell. When a policeman comes to get Arthur he calls him "the curb crawler." Arthur speaks with the two arresting officers, Tomkins and Reed. They tell Arthur they can't get hold of his wife at home and they found boxes of red lightbulbs in the back of his car.
At the Winchester Ray receives a phone call about Arthur. Arthur is charged with assaulting a police officer during arrest and solicitation for prostitution. Ray picks Arthur up from the police station. At the Winchester Arthur explains the situation to Ray and Dave, telling them he got out of his car to check a lamppost then thought he was being mugged. Then a policeman tripped over his foot and he is being charged with assault.
Arthur and Ray go to see a solicitor, Lockwood, who tells them Arthur is going to be charged on three counts. Lockwood tells Arthur a Jaguar was seen driving around the area. Ray says they were looking for Good Time Motors. Lockwood tells them it would be useful for their defence if they could find the owner.
Arthur goes to the hospital to have his foot examined and is told he has a badly sprained Achilles tendon and is temporarily in a wheelchair.
Tomkins and Reed go to see Morley and Field to inform them about Arthur. Morley laughs at the charges and tells them they have the wrong man. Tomkins and Morley both explain to their respective partners they have known each other for years.
Arthur, Ray and Lockwood arrive at the police station. Arthur is in his wheelchair. Arthur gets into an ID line up. An old woman with a walking stick is brought in and asked if she recognises any of the men. She ID's Arthur and says he asked her if she wanted a good time in his motor, but Arthur states he was asking for Good Time Motors. As Arthur leaves the police station, Lockwood tells Arthur things aren't looking good.
Later Ray sees Arthur again leaving the door up the side street. Ray notices Tomkins and Reed are following Arthur and sees them approach the door, looking at the intercom and taking notes. At the lock-up Ray hears Arthur making strange vocal noises in his office. Sid arrives to cancel his order for the lamppost. Arthur asks him to be a witness for him and to mention Good Time Motors. Sid declines, saying it will ruin his business.
Lockwood goes to see Morley and Field, summoning them to give evidence on Arthur's behalf.
Ray and Dave arrive at the lock-up. They sees Arthur practising some strange vocal exercises in his office. Dave tells Arthur they have arranged a big night out for a meal after his trial. And if Arthur gets sent to prison Dave gets his deposit back, so it's a win-win.
Lockwood appeals to Arthur to change his mind about defending himself. Arthur tells Lockwood they still can't find Good Time Motors. Lockwood also mentions the mysterious visits Arthur has been making, and not telling anyone what they are about. Arthur demands privacy. Ray continues to look for Good Time Motors.
Arthur visits Morley and Field. Arthur wants to go over his questions for the trial. Morley refuses and tells Arthur they are only doing it as they are being forced. Arthur tells them he will have to treat them as hostile witnesses. Morley angrily tells him not to be so stupid as they are Arthur's witnesses.
In court, Tomkins is giving evidence, saying they saw Arthur driving around the area.
Ray enters a workshop with the title "Simpsons Antiques" above the door. A man is inside and Ray tells him he is looking for someone called Tony at Good Time Motors. The man confirms he is Tony, but never got around to changing the sign outside.
In court Tomkins tells the prosecuting counsel that they have been unable to locate Good Time Motors. Ray brings Tony to court to give evidence. Lockwood informs Arthur. Ray goes to Arthur's secret meeting place. Tomkins states Arthur was seen leaving a building in soho that has unemployed prostitutes living there. Ray is in a taxi with a flamboyantly dressed man, Ashley.
Arthur calls the Chinese restaurant owners as witnesses. Outside the courtroom Dave and Tony wait with Field and an agitated Morley. On the witness stand Arthur asks Dave about Good Time Motors. Dave says he tried calling them about a dozen times. Ray and Ashley arrive at court. Morley rants at Ray. Arthur panics when he sees Ashley, who has come to give evidence on Arthur's behalf. Arthur refuses to call Ashley as a witness. He calls Tony, who confirms he was selling a Jaguar, like Arthur's, and had been driving it around the area for a few days before Arthur was arrested.
Ashley is called as witness. Arthur jumps out of his wheelchair to yell at Ray, then claims it is a sign he is able to walk again. Morley still waits to be called, telling Ray he will destroy Arthur when he is on the stand. Ashley gives evidence and says he gives private speech lessons and Arthur has been a student of his for five weeks. When Arthur is asked why he didn't reveal this evidence to help his case Ashley says he asked Arthur to keep his teaching quiet, as a once famous actor he was now making a living teaching. When Arthur met him he recognised him immediately and Ashley begged him to keep his identity secret for fear of publicity and ridicule. Arthur agreed, but Ashley was only too happy to help when Ray came to see him to explain Arthur's situation. The case is dismissed. Ray asks Arthur why he was having speaking lessons. Arthur says if former footballers like Billy Mortimer can make £500 per night for a speaking engagement then so can he.
Arthur and Ray leave court. Morley is still impatiently waiting to be called as a witness.