7/10
Absolutely Awesome Medieval-Fantasy Film
9 May 2022
We don't get many medieval-fantasy films these days, especially ones with beautiful women, gore, realistic fight scenes, and some of the best crafted armor from the dark ages.

The glorious part about Hearts and Armor is that it absolutely does live up to its name. The tale is themed around love, but the most visually striking thing about the film is the awesome armor.

I know I'm throwing around the word "awesome" a lot, but that's because there's really nothing like this film out there. I don't even remember how I came across it but I'm glad I did and it was well worth the watch.

Keep in mind that this isn't a fancy Hollywood flick, so the choreography is perfectly applicable to the period and fairly realistic in the tactics the combatants use to fight.

One thing I really like about the film is that unarmored foes are dispatched pretty easily here. Piercing, slashing, and thrusting attacks result in usually fairly quick and gory results. Even with armor it's not always a safe bet the combatants will escape unscathed.

The thing that impressed me the most was how throughout the film (and the fights) the armor gets dinged, dented, and systematically destroyed. This film is kind of bizarre insofar that it has some fantasy elements but also tries to keep a lot of the combat encounters grounded and fairly realistic.

It's a difficult movie to rate, because the plot is a little incoherent, or rather non-linear. It doesn't have a typical Point-A to Point-B plot line, but the theme stays consistent and that's part of what helps draw viewers in.

It's also somewhat unpredictable in a way. You can't always tell how the fights will go. The thing that impressed me most, though, was HOW the weapons were used. They have a lot of clever but realistic weapons from that era and you get to see how clawed weapons are used to strip away armor, how ridged weapons are used to break swords, and how long weapons can be used to dismount horse riders. I was really impressed with the broad range of weapons on display. Also, the fact they included hammers as being used to break bones and disable limbs of foes was quite unique, given that we rarely ever actually see that in films.

It's not perfect, and you probably won't be able to get your hands on a quality HD print, but my gosh any fan of medieval-fantasy films owe it to themselves to give this one a watch. Absolutely fantastic entertainment.
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