Brainscan (1994)
4/10
Brainrot.
14 July 2022
Edward Furlong is not a good actor. He made his name in one of the best action films ever made, Terminator 2, the young actor carried by the star power of Schwarzenegger and James Cameron's incredible action set-pieces, but his lack of talent soon saw him slide into obscurity, appearing in trash like Brainscan on the way down. In this awfully dated technological horror, Furlong is insufferable, his whiny voice grating on the nerves, his character Michael so obnoxious that one longs for something bad to happen to him. Which it does. Sort of.

Horror fan Michael is hauled over the coals by his principal, who isn't happy about the lad's high school 'horror club'; in future, any activity, be it game or movie, must be submitted to the principal for approval. Still, nothing can stop Michael getting his horror kicks at home: after calling a hotline to learn more about interactive CD-Rom game Brainscan, which claims to be the ultimate horror experience, a disc arrives in the post. Michael plays the game, which interfaces with the subconscious, putting the player into a hypnotic state where they 'become' the killer; but when he regains consciousness, Michael discovers that the person he slaughtered in the game has been killed in real life.

Furthermore, Michael meets the mischievous The Trickster (T. Ryder Smith), the game's supernatural host, who tells the boy that he must play subsequent discs if he wants to avoid being arrested for murder by hard-nosed homicide cop Detective Hayden (Frank Langella). Michael reluctantly continues with the game, which results in the death of his best friend Kyle (Jamie Marsh), with Kimberly (Ann Hargreaves), the cute girl-next door, his next potential victim.

If Furlong's terrible acting isn't enough to make you switch off, then the dumb story, dreadful Freddy Krueger wannabe villain, and terrible visual effects should do the trick(ster). This one also boasts some really bad early examples of CGI, but what really makes it really laughable is the equipment in Michael's bedroom: clearly Michael's father is rich, but is he wealthy enough to buy his teenage son what would've been considered cutting-edge computer tech in 1994? And are we expected to believe that the kid customised this kit by himself, creating voice-activated AI a full two decades before the introduction of Alexa? Get this boy a scholarship at M. I. T.!!!

After much stuff and nonsense, all of Michael's trouble's turn out to have been part of the game, everything we have witnessed having happened while he was still under a form of screen-induced hypnosis. This blurring of reality and fantasy seems like a big cop out, but it does lead to a neat twist at the end in which Michael gives the game to his principal for approval, knowing full well the horrors that await him. It's the best part of the film - shame that everything that precedes it is so lame.

3.5/10, generously rounded up to 4 for the music (White Zombie, Pitchshifter, Mudhoney, Primus).
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