Nazis, a mad scientist, a volcanic eruption, and Irish McCalla. What could possibly go wrong here?
Our story begins with hurricane footage, and we are told that the daughter of a rich corporate executive has gone missing in a boat. I don't know the name of the guy who announces all this, but if you watched tv in the 60s, you heard him say on many occasions "A Quinn Martin Production." Anyway, next thing we know, we see the occupants of the boat on a supposedly deserted island. The rich chick is played by the statuesque Irish McCalla, famous as the star of the 1950s tv series "Sheena, Queen of the Jungle." Here, she trades her leopard skin for white blouse and shorts, and her adventurous character for a whining spoiled b****. Accompanying her are Tod Griffin, Victor Sen Yung, and some other guy who eventually gets shish kebabbed, so we'll ignore him. Sen Yung intercepts a radio broadcast which says the island is going to be bombed by planes for target practice. (Had they bombed the island immediately, we would have been spared about 70 minutes of crap.) After a perilous trek through the jungle, where McCalla is threatened by a snake ten feet away from her, they settle down for the night. McCalla takes off her clothes behind a blanket. Even this did not impress me. Soon, they hear drums, and upon investigation, find a bunch of scantily clad dames dancing. Enter hefty Gene Roth in a Gestapo uniform, accompanied by some storm troopers (who wear neckties - hey, those Germans know how to dress.) Roth rounds up the dames and brings them to some cages, chastising them for trying to escape. Now, tell me, if you are trying to escape, do you take the time to stage a dance, with full brass and percussion accompaniment?
Our three borderline-stars find a door in the middle of nowhere, which turns out to be a laboratory. Roth surprises them, and he and Griffin slug it out. Actually, their stunt triples slug it out - their stunt doubles were too ashamed to appear in this film. Eventually, we find out that My Favorite Nazi, Rudolph Anders, is conducting weird experiments on the native women. Anders' wife, played by a woman whose face is covered for almost the entire movie (good career move), has been disfigured, and Anders is trying to restore it. Since Botox has not been invented yet, he opts for something he calls "Character X," which he transfuses from her to a native subject - or maybe it's the other way around, I lost track. Anders quickly sets his sights on McCalla, and attempts to romance her in his Nazi hangout. McCalla is attired in a black dress, which Anders says belongs to his wife. Sure, Rudolph. Your wife also happens to be 5'10" with measurements of 39-24-38.
In the exciting finale, Anders tries to do the transfusion routine on McCalla. The planes arrive and bomb the crap out of the place, and Anders is lava-ed to death. The viewing audience (what's left of them) hurl themselves into the volcano.
There are a few lame attempts at humor, and even more lame attempts at acting. McCalla has an incredible physique, but can't act worth a darn. And because she spends the first half hour of the film complaining about everything, she is a complete turn-off. Griffin can act, but has no charisma. What he does have is a weird patch of hair (or something) in the middle of his chest. He spends the first ten minutes of the film bare-chested, which makes no sense, since his body is only slightly more toned than Don Knotts'. Sen Yung gets off some wisecracks, like "Boy, this island is turning into one big hot plate!" and "Let's blow this crazy fire trap!" I liked him better as Charlie Chan's #2 son, rather than in this pile of #2. Anders chews the scenery, while Roth blocks the scenery. The dancing girls are played by the Diane Nellis Dancers. Yeah, I never heard of them either.
Our story begins with hurricane footage, and we are told that the daughter of a rich corporate executive has gone missing in a boat. I don't know the name of the guy who announces all this, but if you watched tv in the 60s, you heard him say on many occasions "A Quinn Martin Production." Anyway, next thing we know, we see the occupants of the boat on a supposedly deserted island. The rich chick is played by the statuesque Irish McCalla, famous as the star of the 1950s tv series "Sheena, Queen of the Jungle." Here, she trades her leopard skin for white blouse and shorts, and her adventurous character for a whining spoiled b****. Accompanying her are Tod Griffin, Victor Sen Yung, and some other guy who eventually gets shish kebabbed, so we'll ignore him. Sen Yung intercepts a radio broadcast which says the island is going to be bombed by planes for target practice. (Had they bombed the island immediately, we would have been spared about 70 minutes of crap.) After a perilous trek through the jungle, where McCalla is threatened by a snake ten feet away from her, they settle down for the night. McCalla takes off her clothes behind a blanket. Even this did not impress me. Soon, they hear drums, and upon investigation, find a bunch of scantily clad dames dancing. Enter hefty Gene Roth in a Gestapo uniform, accompanied by some storm troopers (who wear neckties - hey, those Germans know how to dress.) Roth rounds up the dames and brings them to some cages, chastising them for trying to escape. Now, tell me, if you are trying to escape, do you take the time to stage a dance, with full brass and percussion accompaniment?
Our three borderline-stars find a door in the middle of nowhere, which turns out to be a laboratory. Roth surprises them, and he and Griffin slug it out. Actually, their stunt triples slug it out - their stunt doubles were too ashamed to appear in this film. Eventually, we find out that My Favorite Nazi, Rudolph Anders, is conducting weird experiments on the native women. Anders' wife, played by a woman whose face is covered for almost the entire movie (good career move), has been disfigured, and Anders is trying to restore it. Since Botox has not been invented yet, he opts for something he calls "Character X," which he transfuses from her to a native subject - or maybe it's the other way around, I lost track. Anders quickly sets his sights on McCalla, and attempts to romance her in his Nazi hangout. McCalla is attired in a black dress, which Anders says belongs to his wife. Sure, Rudolph. Your wife also happens to be 5'10" with measurements of 39-24-38.
In the exciting finale, Anders tries to do the transfusion routine on McCalla. The planes arrive and bomb the crap out of the place, and Anders is lava-ed to death. The viewing audience (what's left of them) hurl themselves into the volcano.
There are a few lame attempts at humor, and even more lame attempts at acting. McCalla has an incredible physique, but can't act worth a darn. And because she spends the first half hour of the film complaining about everything, she is a complete turn-off. Griffin can act, but has no charisma. What he does have is a weird patch of hair (or something) in the middle of his chest. He spends the first ten minutes of the film bare-chested, which makes no sense, since his body is only slightly more toned than Don Knotts'. Sen Yung gets off some wisecracks, like "Boy, this island is turning into one big hot plate!" and "Let's blow this crazy fire trap!" I liked him better as Charlie Chan's #2 son, rather than in this pile of #2. Anders chews the scenery, while Roth blocks the scenery. The dancing girls are played by the Diane Nellis Dancers. Yeah, I never heard of them either.