Vivarium (2019)
3/10
Pretentious and dull
13 September 2023
A common theme of hip, artsy cliques is that suburbia is hell on earth. Vivarium takes this conceit literally and traps two people in a suburban development of identical homes. The pair are unable to find a way out. Ultimately the man works himself to death and the woman raises a child. The child reaches maturity and, her work done, she dies.

Ignoring the obnoxious "I'm superior" implicit in dismissing anyone who chooses to raise a family in suburbia, the problem with this movie is the couple did not choose the "suburban drone" lifestyle. They rejected it from the outset: they made fun of the neighborhood, rejected the option to buy, and panicked when they discovered it was forced upon them. These were not people residing in suburbia due to life circumstances, either. These people were prisoners, plain and simple: they were treated as such and they worked tirelessly to escape. So much for dismissing the "mindless drone" ego boost.

If the movie fails as a dark sendup of suburbia - and let me be clear, it does - it epically fails as entertainment. The first fifteen or twenty minutes sets up the premise, introduces the mysteries, and gives us all the backstory (none) and character development (none) and answers (none) we're going to get. The remaining hour plus is spent watching two prisoners enduring isolation together. The two leads are woefully miscast, having collectively the charisma and chemistry of an It's A Small World animatronic. The introduction of a third character, the child, should have injected some life into the proceedings. But the child had the personality of a Roomba.

Unrelentingly tedious, pretentious, dull and dreary, this is not a good watch. Suburbia is bad. There, I just saved you an hour and a half. Three stars for the real estate agent. Three stars.
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