Top-rated
Tue, Jan 5, 1993
Part 1 of 2: D.J. is busted at school for having obscene reading material. Dan meets with the principal, but dreads it, because he is certain that the reading material D.J. brought to school is one of his raunchy magazines. He soon discovers that the reading material is far more twisted; begging the question of where D.J. got it, and leaving him speechless by the answer. Roseanne and Dan discover that Jackie has been keeping a dark secret, and each of them try to help her by dealing with it in their own, unique way.
Top-rated
Tue, Jan 12, 1993
Part 2 of 2: Dan gets bailed out of jail by an amused Darlene, while rumors fly from wild to wilder, as to why he was arrested. Jackie learns why Dan was arrested, and finds herself both angry with, and touched by Dan's protective gesture. Overwhelmed, and feeling like things are moving too fast, Jackie leans on Roseanne to help her move out of Fisher's apartment. Roseanne lovingly declares that her family is officially "Poor White Trash".
Tue, Jan 26, 1993
The Conners prepare for the 'Founding Fathers Day' celebration in Lanford. Roseanne sets up a food booth, where she meets the one and only, Loretta Lynn. D.J. and his Woodchuck Troup, put on the town play reenacting the signing of Lanford's incorporation. Their family's own founding father, Dan, gets a job selling hot tubs. And last, but not least, Darlene protests the Conners' involvement in the whole "meat industrial complex" with vandalism at her mother's diner that lands her in more than just hot water.
Tue, Mar 9, 1993
Roseanne and Dan plan a romantic dinner date to celebrate their twentieth wedding anniversary, but struggle with what to give one another. Dan finds out that Roseanne has decided on something expensive for him, so in order to get Roseanne a nice gift too, he takes a temporary job at Maury's Big and Tall store. His gift idea (and the job to pay for it), which seemed like a good idea at the time, soon blows up in his face.
Tue, Mar 23, 1993
Tired of having their Mom hanging around them all the time, Roseanne and Jackie try to encourage a relationship between Beverly and Jake, her friend from the retirement community they both live in. Molly comes on to, and kisses David, making him nervous and uncomfortable. To back her off, David confesses the plans he and Darlene have for the future, like possibly dropping out of school and running away together. Having seen and overheard this strange exchange, D.J. confronts Darlene with what he knows, and asks her if any of it is true, prompting Darlene ponders David's fate.
Tue, Apr 6, 1993
After some prodding from (and striking deals with) her Mom, Darlene agrees to go to the prom with David, where she has a surprise deal of her own for her boyfriend. Roger attempts to strike a deal with Dan, using the temptation of being able to make him a ton of money, but is met with a mixed reaction from the Conners. Roseanne attempts a surprise fix-up between Jackie and Roger for a couples' night out, but to Roseanne's surprise, Roger shows up with a date. His choice of date is a jaw-dropping, shock to everyone.
Tue, May 4, 1993
When it looks like the fixer-upper house Dan has invested in is going to pay off, the Conners are on top of the world. But when the buyer backs out, and one partner skips out, and the bills are due on the project-house, that world threatens to come crashing down. Pushed by Beverly's latest attempt at driving Jackie insane, Jackie finally blurts out to her Mom that she has been seeing a psychiatrist. Nancy decides she wants to have a baby, but her chosen sperm-donor turns out to be a real rotten egg. An unlikely source rides in who just may save the day for the Conners.
Tue, May 11, 1993
D.J. comes running in the house with a skinned knee. Dan and Roseanne take him to the kitchen to get fixed up, but when Dan slings open the freezer door to get ice, he accidentally hits Roseanne in the face, knocking out a tooth. After a few failed attempts earlier in their relationship, Darlene and David finally have sex for the first time. They also get the responses to their college applications. David doesn't get in, but Darlene does, prompting her to hide the truth... at first. Determined to be allowed to go to this art school in Chicago, Darlene enlists her Aunt Jackie's help to try and talk Roseanne into letting her go. Dan gets a job with the City.
Tue, Sep 21, 1993
Roseanne makes a deal with Jackie: if Jackie asks Fred out, Roseanne will ask their mother to become a silent partner in the restaurant and stay away; feelings hurt, Bev swears she won't have anything to do with either of them. Jackie and Fred go out; he wants them to keep going out, but she doesn't. Roseanne feels guilty about hurting Bev and wants her to do something hurtful back to lessen her guilt; Bev takes her up on that by selling her share of the diner to the very last person Roseanne expected...or wanted.
Tue, Sep 28, 1993
Jackie and Roseanne plan a housewarming party for Jackie's new home and try to hide it from their mom. Roseanne invites Darlene home for the weekend to get her back together with David. D.J. goes through a rebellious period of skipping school and enlisting Darlene's help in covering for him, and Roseanne is determined to find out what's going on. Fred pursues Jackie after their one-night stand.
Top-rated
Tue, Oct 5, 1993
When Roseanne finds a bag of pot in David's room, she's angry---and worried about how Dan is going to react. Of course, he goes ballistic, until he realizes the stuff is a 20-year old relic of his and Roseanne's youth, inevitably, they roll a joint for old times' sake, and before you can say "like, wow," Dan, Roseanne and her sister, Jackie, are adrift in a Cheech-and-Chong time warp. At first, they have fun sneaking around like they did in the '70s, hoping not to get busted by their children, but then adult realities set in like a bad trip.
Tue, Oct 19, 1993
Trying to conceive another child, Roseanne puts Dan on a "lovemaking schedule," to no avail. Jackie discovers that she's pregnant from her one-night stand with Fred and hesitates about telling him. Roseanne has no problem spreading Jackie's good news to their mom and their friends, but is stopped before she can tell Fred. To relieve the pressure and disappointment, Dan and Roseanne decide to stop actually trying to get pregnant, and let nature take its course.
Tue, Oct 26, 1993
The Conners gear up for their favorite holiday, with their traditional flair for trying to out-prank one another. Roseanne, the queen of Halloween, falls for the various elaborate pranks pulled on her by her family, for a change. Nancy is upset because she is painfully aware that Dan doesn't like her, so Roseanne sets out to convince her she is wrong by insisting that Dan pull a prank on Nancy, before Nancy sells her share of the diner to Leon.
Tue, Nov 2, 1993
Roseanne's attempt to encourage David to snap out of his moping over Darlene and do something with his life backfires when he decides to move back in with his mom in Michigan; when Darlene comes home for a visit to surprise David, they wind up at each other's throats; D.J. is humiliated when the entire family figures out why he locks himself in the bathroom for long stays.
Tue, Nov 9, 1993
Roseanne's high-school nemesis, and Dan's high-school fling, visits Dan at the city garage and invites him to lunch. Jackie finds out from Fred, lies to Roseanne, and confronts Dan at home that evening, but believes him that it was just an innocent lunch date. Unaware of how Dan spent his lunch hour, Roseanne confides in Jackie that Dan played hooky and they had the best sex ever. Since Jackie can't lie convincingly to her sister, Roseanne realizes that she's been lied to and forces Dan to come clean. Enraged and humiliated by the answer, she walks out on him.
Tue, Nov 16, 1993
Following the Homecoming game, Dan holds a 25-year-reunion party for his former high school football team and begs his family to behave begging his family to put up a loving, happy front for the duration. Becky and Mark come home for a visit after a long absence following their move; they're fight and Becky contemplates leaving him. Roseanne invites them to move in so they can get on their feet financially, and Darlene shares a secret with Becky.
Tue, Nov 30, 1993
Leon manipulates Nancy and Jackie into voting to serve breakfast at the diner, among other changes, without consulting Roseanne. Starved for attention, D.J. steals and wrecks the family car while joyriding, and a stressed-out Roseanne lashes out violently, which she quickly regrets. The power play between Leon and Roseanne escalates, and Dan advises Leon to back off, but when he realizes that Roseanne is not just being paranoid about Leon, he steps aside and leaves Leon to Roseanne's mercy.
Tue, Dec 14, 1993
After receiving notice from the neighborhood association about not putting up tacky Christmas decorations on their property, the Conners go all out for a "white trash" Christmas. Dan and Roseanne offer Becky money to start college, but freak when she gives the money to her husband Mark to attend trade-school. When they forbid her to give it to him, she retaliates by refusing the money and taking a job in a Hooters-like bar/restaurant, Bunz, to pay for Mark's schooling herself. Meanwhile, Bev and D.J. drop in on Darlene unannounced and D.J. discovers the secret Darlene's been keeping from the family; and Dan teaches Mark secrets of a happy marriage.