Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)

Shannon Elizabeth: Justice

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Sissy : Since you let our patsy slip away, you gotta convince the little kid and the fat guy to take his place. They gotta break into Provasik now.

  Justice : Uh-uh.

  Sissy : Uh-huh. You'll do it, or you're out of the gang, Justice. Just use the little one's crush on you to convince him, since he's SO fucking in love with you.

  Justice : Jay? No, he's not.

  Sissy : What am I, blind? He wasn't kissing your hand in the back of the van like he was fucking Lord Byron?

  Justice : Well, maybe he just has manners.

  [cut to Jay outside, hollering at a woman walking past him] 

  Jay : Yo, baby, you ever had your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?

  [he turns to Silent Bob, who stares at him in shock] 

  Jay : Yeeaah...!

• [Justice and Sissy are engaged in a fist-fight] 

  Sissy : Your shit is really getting tired, Justice.

  Justice : Call me 'Boo-Boo-Kitty-Fuck', bitch.

• Jay : What's twistin' this bitches tit?

  Justice : Maybe it's because girls don't like to be called bitches, Jay.

  Jay : They don't? How 'bout "fine piece of ass"?

  Justice : How about not.

  Jay : Then what the fuck am I supposed to call you?

  Justice : Something sweet, ya big goof. Something nice.

  Jay : Boo boo kitty fuck?

  Justice : That's... a start.

• Jay : So, you think I could get a little kiss for good luck?

  [Justice kisses him passionately] 

  Jay : Think I could get a little blow job for good luck?

  Justice : No. Go.

  Jay : Fuck.

  [Silent Bob tries to get a good luck of his own] 

  Jay : Get off my Kool-Aid motherfucka!

• Willenholly : Oh my God. I'm paralyzed! That monkey shot me in the ass and paralyzed me! Oh sweet irony!

  Justice : You're not paralyzed. It was just a tranquilizer.

• Justice : If I go to prison will you wait for me?

  Jay : Hmm, I don't know. Will you fuck me when you get out?

  [Justice kisses him passionately] 

  Jay : Don't change the subject. Will you fuck me when you get out?

  Justice : Snoogans.

  [Goes back to kissing Jay] 

• Justice : Hi, I'm Justice.

  Jay : And I'm so fucking yours.

  [Justice is almost repulsed when Jay makes a quick save] 

  Jay : Oh, Hi, I'm Jay and this is my hetero-life-mate, Silent Bob.

  Justice : It's nice to meet you.

  Jay : Justice, that's a nice name...

  [aside] 

  Jay : Jay and Justice sitting in a tree, f-u-c-k-i-n-g...

• Justice : They didn't really steal the monkey. It was just a diversion so we could steal these.

  [showing a bag of stolen diamonds] 

  Justice : And they're not the leaders of the C.L.I.T. The C.L.I.T is not real.

  Whillenholly : No the clit is real. Its the female orgasm that's the myth.

• Jay : So what can a smooth pimp daddy like myself do to help the animals?

  Justice : Oh... you REALLY don't wanna help us.

  Jay : The fuck you talkin' about? Sure, I do. I'd do anything for you.

  [Justice smiles at him] 

  Jay : I mean youse guys, I'd do anything for youse guys, 'cause for the lift and shit.

  Justice : Okay. Well, um, let me just talk to the other girls and get back to you.

  Jay : Yeah, you do that. I'll be right here waitin'.

  [he kisses Justice's hand romantically; she smiles and moves to the front of the van. Jay looks at Silent Bob and smirks, but Bob mockingly imitates Jay's move. Jay slaps his face] 

  Jay : Fuck you, fatty.

• Justice : Wait for me.

  Jay : What, here?

• Jay : Anyway, we were talking to Brody, and he told us about the Bluntman and Chronic movies, so we went to Holden McNeill and he showed us the Internet, and that's where we found all these little fucking little jerkoffs talking shit about us, and we decided to go to Hollywood and stop the movie from being made. And now we're here.

  Justice : I have no idea what you just said.

  Jay : I get that a lot