3rd Rock from the Sun (TV Series)

Truth or Dick (1996)

John Lithgow: Dr. Dick Solomon

Quotes 

• Tommy Solomon : [having a bad day as an adolescent]  As the oldest member of this crew, I feel it's my duty to inform you all that this planet both wipes and sucks! In that order.

  Dr. Dick Solomon : What is your problem?

  Tommy Solomon : Something's wrong. My transfer's not holding. I'm growin' hair and my armpits smell and there's a constant circus in my pants.

• Dr. Dick Solomon : [Dick can't ignore the enormous mole on Dr Byron's forehead]  You know, you really should have that thing removed. It's all I can look at.

• Dr. Dick Solomon : The truth is, you're delightful. I love looking at you. I don't know what it is about tonight. Maybe it's the wine, maybe it's the way the light hits your eyes. But you look puffy. You should go home and sleep.

  [pause] 

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Is that better?

  Dr. Mary Albright : Sadly, yes.

• Nina Campbell : I knew you had a thing for her!

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Yes, but I understand I'm not allowed to show it to her without her permission.

• Dr. Mary Albright : [outraged at Dick's behavior when he substituted for her at a faculty meeting]  All you had to do was show up and feign interest.

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Feign? I will not be a party to feigning. I always tell the complete truth.

  Dr. Mary Albright : Truth? Then I will be *brutally* frank.

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Good. I'll be Genuine Dick.

• Campus Cop : Is there a problem?

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Yes, there's a star missing

  [Solomons all point towards the sky] 

  Dr. Dick Solomon : We think we know who did it.

• Dr. Dick Solomon : You see, lying accomplishes NOTHING! Somebody tricks you into substituting, you make a fool of yourself and your sister can't get a driver's license!

  Pitman : Dr. Solomon, is this going to be on the final?

• Dr. Dick Solomon : As Einstein once said,

  [starts speaking German] 

  Dr. Dick Solomon : . Any thoughts on that?

  [Puzzled silence from the class] 

  Caryn : Dr. Solomon, I think you were speaking German.

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Yes, German. Einstein spoke German.

  [Looks around in disdain] 

  Dr. Dick Solomon : Oh, fine, I'll simplify!