Blackadder the Third (TV Series)

Nob and Nobility (1987)

Rowan Atkinson: Edmund Blackadder - Butler to the Prince

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lord Topper : [posing as the Comte de Frou Frou]  Have no fear! Ze Scarlet Pimpernel will save us!

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : Ha! Some hope. The Pimpernel is the most overrated human being since Judas Iscariot won the A.D. 31 Best Disciple Competition.

• Blackadder : Farewell, dear master, and - dare I say it - friend.

  Prince George : Farewell, brave liberator, and - dare I say it - butler.

• Blackadder : If I don't make it back, please write to my mother and tell her I've been alive all the time. It's just that I couldn't be bothered to get in touch with the old bat.

• [Referring to a suicide pill they have both been given, after being captured by French revolutionaries] 

  Baldrick : I'm glad to say you won't be needing that pill, Mr. B.

  Blackadder : Am I jumping the gun, Baldrick, or are the words "I have a cunning plan" marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?

  Baldrick : They certainly are.

  Blackadder : Well, forgive me if I don't do a cartwheel of joy; your record in this department is hardly 100%. So what is it?

  Baldrick : We do nothing...

  Blackadder : Yup, it's another world-beater.

  Baldrick : No, wait. We do nothing... until our heads have actually been cut off.

  Blackadder : And then we... spring into action?

• Mrs. Miggins : Bonjour, Monsieur

  Blackadder : Excuse me.

  Mrs. Miggins : It's French.

  Blackadder : So is eating frogs, cruelty to geese and urinating on the streets.

• Blackadder : We hate the French! We fight wars against the French! Did all those men die in vain on the fields of Agincourt? Was the man who burned Joan of Arc just wasting good matches?

• Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : I'll have a cup of coffee, and some shepherd's pie.

  Mrs. Miggins : Ooh, we don't serve *pies* anymore! My French clientèle consider pies uncouth.

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : I hardly think that a nation that eats snails, and would go to bed with the kitchen sink if it put on a tutu, is in any position to preach couthness.

• Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : Look, mate, me old mate... We're both working class; we both these rich b*stards; I mean, come on, come on, me old mucker, just, just let me go - you've got nothing against me...

  Ambassador - Fearsome Revolutionary : On the contrarie! I you English with your boring trousers and your shiny toilet paper, and your ridiculous preconception that Frenchmen are great lovers...

  [looks both ways, then speaks softly] 

  Ambassador - Fearsome Revolutionary : *I'm* French, and I'm hung like a baby carrot and a couple of petit-pois.

• Blackadder : I was merely pointing out that sneaking aristocrats out from under the noses of French Revolutionaries is about as difficult as putting on a hat!

• Blackadder : His Royal Highness, the Pinhead of Wales, summons me. I feel almost well-disposed towards him this morning. Utter chump though he may be, at least he's not French.

• Blackadder : [to Baldrick]  Unless I think of something, tomorrow we go to meet our Maker: in my case God, in your case God knows.

• Mrs. Miggins : The Scarlet Pimpernel, Mr. Blackadder! He's so exciting, don't you think?

  Blackadder : Actually, I think he's the most over-rated human being since Judas Iscariot won the AD31 Best Disciple Competition.

• Blackadder : Stick the kettle on, Baldrick

  Baldrick : What? Aren't we going to France?

  Blackadder : Of course we're not going to France! It's incredibly dangerous!

  Baldrick : Well, how you gonna win your bet?

  Blackadder : Simple, Baldrick. By the use of the large thing between my ears.

  Baldrick : Ohhh. Your nose.

• Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : Wait a minute. I've thought of a plan.

  Baldrick : Hurray!

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : Also, I've thought of a way to get you to sleep.

  Baldrick : What?

  Baldrick : [Blackadder hits Baldrick, presumably on top of the head]  Ooh!

• Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : [to the 'Compte du Frou Frou]  How would like a chance to earn some money?

  Lord Topper : Non. I would like other people to earn it and then give it to me. Just like in France in the good old days!

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : But this is a chance to return to the good old days.

  Lord Topper : Oh, how I would love that. The food here is filthy. This huge sausage is very suspicious. If I did not know better, I'd say it was a horse's... .

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : Yes, yes, yes.

• Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : I'm looking for a specific type of Frenchman. One that is obviously of noble blood but short on cash.

  Mrs. Miggins : Ah, I have just the fellow for you. Over there. The Compte du Frou Frou. He's pretty down on his luck. He's made that horse's willy last all morning.

• Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : What is on the menu today?

  Mrs. Miggins : Well, we have scarlet chicken in a pimpernel sauce, pimpernel chicken in a scarlet sauce, or huge suspicious looking sausages in a scarlet pimpernel sauce.

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : What exactly is scarlet pimpernel sauce?

  Mrs. Miggins : You take a large, ripe frog. You squeeze it... ..

  Edmund Blackadder, Esq, Butler to the Prince : Yes, yes, yes.