Cheers (TV Series)

King of the Hill (1985)

Rhea Perlman: Carla Tortelli

Quotes 

• Diane Chambers : Carla, I don't think you should be engaging in strenuous activity when you're with child.

  Carla Tortelli : If I didn't do things with child, I'd never leave the house. The only thing I ever did without child resulted in one.

• Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso : Sam, are you really going to play in this charity game?

  Sam Malone : Yeah, you know I was out there warming up Coach, and my arm feels pretty good.

  Carla Tortelli : Are you kidding me? When a butterfly lands on a ball in mid-flight, it's not cooking.

  Sam Malone : All I care about is not embarrassing myself.

  Carla Tortelli : Good luck.

  Sam Malone : I have a right to be a little bit rusty. The only thing I've thrown in the past ten years is Diane's butt out of here.

  Diane Chambers : No Sam, you're thinking of the tantrums you threw when I walked out of here.

  Sam Malone : Ah.

  Carla Tortelli : [sarcastically]  You know, the only thing I enjoy hearing more than you two argue on the subject is hearing Cliff talk about Florida.

  Cliff Clavin : Well, as a matter of fact, I was just about to tell Normie here that Florida is a pollution-free state. You know, you know how they treat solid waste?

  Carla Tortelli : You said they treated you very well.

• Diane Chambers : [about Playboy Playmates]  What kind of culture do I live where they are the ideal woman?

  Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso : Well gee Diane, you've got to admit they are beautiful.

  Diane Chambers : Coach, take away all their make-up, all their expensive hair cuts and those bodies, and what have you got?

  Carla Tortelli : You!

• Ginger : Hey, are you upset about something?

  Carla Tortelli : You know what bugs me about women like you?

  Ginger : What?

  Carla Tortelli : You take off all your clothes, you pose for a magazine, thousands of men see you naked. I have to go to them one by one. It's not fair.