Frasier (TV Series)
Dark Victory (1995)
Jane Leeves: Daphne Moon
Photos
Quotes
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[having gone out of his way to cheer everyone up on his father's birthday, everyone is abandoning Frasier's planned celebration to join a party downstairs]
Frasier : No, no thank you. I'm not really in the mood any more.
Daphne : Oh, don't be a party pooper.
Martin : Ah, leave him. He's always been this way.
Frasier : Excuse me! Just-just a second! I think it's time we learnt what it is to walk in the shoes of this particular party pooper. I spend the damn week administering to the troubled and the neurotic and the just plain goofy, and then I hang up my earphones and it doesn't end there! Out on the street, in the cafe, even in this building. More people. More problems. I suppose they think it's okay, it's what I do. But every time I try to help them it costs me a little piece of myself. A little bit here, a little bit there, a little bit here, a little bit there... until I end up feeling like a zebra carcass on the Serengeti surrounded by burping vultures! Well, this happened to be one of those weeks. I had my escape planned. I was going to come home for an evening of fun with my extended family. What do I get? I get the four of you going at each other like the Borgias on a bad day! So I roll up my sleeves, and I tend to each one of you. And you all feel better. And the minute you get a whiff of mesquite coming from down below, you are out the door! Without so much as a 'thank you'! Well, thank you for the invitation, but I am, frankly, fed up with people and their problems. The doctor is out.
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[playing a game called "I'm the Dullest Person"]
Frasier : If I was going to go I would say, "I am the dullest person because I have never been on a rollercoaster." All right? And then all of you that have been on a rollercoaster would give me a penny. Now we all have our pennies. Who would like to go first? Daphne?
Daphne : I can't think of anything.
Frasier : Of course you can. Just say the first thing that comes into your mind. I'm the dullest person because...
Daphne : Oh, I don't know. Because I've never made love in a lift or a phone booth or on an aeroplane or a merry-go-round.
Frasier : Okay, that's good, but strategically speaking that's not the best way to get our pennies. You see, it should be something that someone else might have actually...
[Roz throws in a penny]
Frasier : ...done.
[Roz throws in three more pennies while everyone else stares at her]
Roz : I was in college, I was trying to find myself!
Niles : All you needed to do was look under the nearest man.
