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8/10
Toulouse's low tricks
ShadeGrenade25 October 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Written by Jay Simms and Fred Eggers, and directed by Barry Shear, 'The Moulin Ruse Affair' is among the madder 'G.F.U.' episodes, and is all the better for being so. 'Jan Streich' ( Burt Mustin ) is an elderly man possessed of incredible strength who literally breaks into U.N.C.L.E. H.Q. and tries to abduct Mr.Waverly. April gasses him, but he later dies. Scientist 'Dr.Vladmir Toulouse' ( Shelley Berman ) has developed 'Vitamin Q' which gives a person super-strength, and threatens to unleash an army of super humans unless U.N.C.L.E. pays up five million dollars. Mark goes to see Toulouse's drunken friend 'Nadia Marcolescu' ( Fifties bombshell and 'Lily Munster' herself - Yvonne De Carlo ) who keeps a live tiger as a pet. When Mark's cover is blown, Toulouse forces him to take a Vitamin Q tablet...

Shelley Berman had the misfortune to appear in the horrendous 'M.F.U.' episode 'The Super-Colossal Affair', but this is a far better vehicle for him, promoting him to the role of chief villain. His appearance is modelled on the famous French painter Toulouse Latrec; watching him walk everywhere on his knees, holding a cane, and wearing a top hat, one is instantly reminded of Peter Sellers in 'Revenge Of The Pink Panther' ( 1978 ). De Carlo is stunningly beautiful, and good value as 'Nadia', who turns out to be a secret THRUSH agent keen to have Vitamin Q for herself. The climax takes place on the island of Moulin in the Caribbean, where Toulouse runs a care home for old people ( one of this episode's undisputed highlights is the sight of 'Grandma Walton' herself - actress Ellen Corby - displaying her superhuman skills by fighting Toulouse's elite guards. If only she had done the same thing to John Boy and co ). Which brings me to the episode's other outstanding attribute - the girls who make up the Amazon guards are wearing skin-tight costumes with ( one assumes ) very little beneath. One of their number - the oddly-named 'Rabbit' - is played by the late Tura Satana, whose exotic looks landed her roles in many a secret agent movie of the period. The stunning Thordis Brandt is on view ( and isn't there a lot of her to see? ) as 'Miss Ibsen'. April and Mark are captured by Toulouse and their heads are inserted through holes in a floor, and an army of explosive robots - all of which resemble Toulouse - marches their way. A thrilling climax to an enjoyable, absurd episode.
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Sixties steroid: Vitamin Q knocked back with a giant martini
copper196321 October 2006
Wow! What a cast. Yvonne DeCarlo is equal parts villain and alcoholic. She is also terribly farsighted. She kisses a bust thinking it's her lover. Comedian Shelly Berman plays Doctor Toulouse and is cut off at the knees. I couldn't figure out how they did this effect. The rest of the cast is rounded out by Russ Meyer favorite, Tura Santana, "Grandma Walton" (Ellen Corby), fellow senior citizen, Burt Mustin, and young Barry Robbins, before he played his most famous role, as a boy named "Cotton," for Director Stanley Kramer. The plot, as it was, concerned U.N.C.L.E. and T.H.R.U.S.H. bidding for a drug invented by THE dwarf. The drug had the ability to give the taker super strength and speed. Mister Mustin ingests a tablet and goes berserk, nearly destroying the U.N.C.L.E. headquarters. Everything in this show is a bit campy and surreal. The Amazon guards at the compound are dressed in leftovers from a B-movie from the 50's. Miss Decarlo drinks one of the largest martini's I've ever seen. She offers her kitty cat, a full size lion, a drink before dinner. There is an army of "Mister Bill" robots that stand only a foot tall. But they are lethal. A platoon of old folks are used as guinea pigs for testing the drugs. They are enlisted to beat back the guards and save the day for mankind. Tura Satana has the moxie and power to combat the seniors. She is forgotten. Sadly. Nothing in this show could be taken seriously. But it was fun.
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