Hogan's Heroes (TV Series)

The Battle of Stalag 13 (1966)

Bob Crane: Col. Hogan

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : Col. Hogan, you MUST tell me what iss going to happen!

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Sorry, Schultz, can't help you.

  Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : Hmm, I don't believe you. Somehow or other, I don't know how - this is a matter I do not want to inquire into - but somehow you always know.

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : What's it to you, Schultz? You're a soldier. If they close down Stalag 13, you sling you pack over your shoulder and go fight Russians.

  Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : Col. Hogan, I'm a married man with five children. I can not afford to fight ANYBODY!

• General von Kattenhorn : [still looking for soldiers to fight the S.S]  Vhat about arming the prisoners, Klink?

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : Well, heh-heh, sir, they have no more fighting spirit. I have cowed them.

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Yes, yes, he's cowed us.

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : And we have no more guns.

  Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : They can perhaps have mine?

• Col. Robert E. Hogan : [regarding German promotions at the front]  I'll say one thing about those Russians - they sure create the vacancies.

• Col. Robert E. Hogan : Newkirk?

  Cpl. Peter Newkirk : Yes, sir.

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : We need Wehrmacht uniforms for everybody.

  Cpl. Peter Newkirk : How much time do I have, sir?

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : You have three minutes.

  Cpl. Peter Newkirk : I think I can just make it.

• Sgt. James 'Kinch' Kinchloe : Big doin's upstairs, Colonel. Feldkamp has surrounded the camp with an S.S. battalion to get his car back; von Kattenhorn just finished calling for an infantry regiment to fight the S.S.

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : [very pleased]  That's beautiful. Beautiful!

  Greta : You mean they're gonna fight a battle among themselves?

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : I'd LOVE it. Unfortunately, some of US might get shot.

• [an explosion] 

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : What was that?

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Sounded like a staff car blowing up.

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : A staff car?

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Yeah.

  [second explosion heard] 

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Coincidence! Another staff car!

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : Hogan, you knew they were going top blow up.

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Of course. Von Kattenhorn and Feldkamp double-crossed each other.

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : Did you expect ME to believe that?

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : No, sir, but it's gonna look a lot neater on your report to Berlin.

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : Hm. Schultz? Schultz!

  Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : I believe it, Herr Kommandant! I believe it!

  Col. Wilhelm Klink : If Berlin knew one tenth of what I had to put up with. Just one TENTH!

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : Yep. Rough war, sir.

• Col. Robert E. Hogan : Now remember, don't drive it any more than necessary.

  Cpl. Peter Newkirk : Well, we hadn't planned on taking a trip, sir, but why not?

  Col. Robert E. Hogan : 'Cause we're paying the kraut sergeant in the motor pool ten cents a mile.