L.A. Law (TV Series)

One Rat, One Ranger (1989)

Jill Eikenberry: Ann Kelsey

Quotes 

• Rosalind Shays : I want a tax matter.

  Ann Kelsey : As a matter a fact, it's not a tax matter.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : He, uh, he just jumped into the breach, so to speak. His forte is strictly tux.

  Rosalind Shays : I hope with the adequate.

  Ann Kelsey : Well, he hasn't been found wanting up until now.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : We're also fully prepared to make whatever adjustments are necessary.

  Ann Kelsey : Assuming any are necessary.

  Leland McKenzie : What else?

  Rosalind Shays : Your litigation department.

  Michael Kuzak : What about it?

  Rosalind Shays : Well, other than your tax attorney having to fill in. I want to be certainly you're not about to lose one of your aces.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Who's that?

  Rosalind Shays : Victor Sifuentes. He's been associate for 3 years. With his reputation, he's got to be looking for a partnership.

  Leland McKenzie : Rosalind, the truth is that a partnership offers not contemplated in the near future who Victor is. On the other hand, I expect that one ultimately will be made and I have no reason to believe that we're in danger of losing him.

  Rosalind Shays : Good. And while we're speaking about associates, I should let you know that I will be bringing one with me.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : I see no reason that we can accommodate you there.

  Arnie Becker : Maybe we should first get a better idea of what that accommodation entails.

  Ann Kelsey : Before we do that, maybe we should ask ourselves if this is really a place where Rosalind can be happy.

  Rosalind Shays : Let me say something. Right now we're very wary of each other. We should be wary. If there's venture is going to go forward, but then you have to adjust to each other. I'm willing to deal halfway. If you're looking for more than, we got the wrong team.

• Jonathan Rollins : They have mineral in El Segundo?

  Abby Perkins : It's invisible water. It's been filtered and flavored of Juniper extract and bottles.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : And we expect this to go to trial, too?

  Abby Perkins : Actually, no. Our guy is trying to come up with another names and we can make this whole thing disappear quietly.

  Michael Kuzak : As well he might.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Partners meeting. Tonight 8pm.

  Victor Sifuentes : Hmm. Little party after doctors split up the pie, eh? To the partners go the spoils.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : What can I say? We all have a part to play.

  Benny Stulwicz : Yeah.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Good, Benny. Good.

  Ann Kelsey : What's this?

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Melons by mail. A cut-rate produce output that ships by mail. Saves money. Saves working it up here from the store. I ordered 30 lbs. of cantaloupe for a third of what you'd pay in the store.

• Leland McKenzie : Rosalind, first off, let me welcome you. I'm only stating the obvious when I say that we all have the highest regard for your reputation isn't an attorney.

  Rosalind Shays : Let me say the equally obvious which is that the admiration is mutual.

  Leland McKenzie : That said. I'm sure there's a plethora of questions that need to be asked.

  Rosalind Shays : Ready on the left. Ready the right. Ready on the firing line.

  Ann Kelsey : I guess I'll start. You've been successful where you are, why do you want to make a move at all?

  Rosalind Shays : A large law firm can get very bureaucratic. I found myself fighting that too much of the time. And as my visibility grew, it became somewhat of a threat to other members of the firm.

  Arnie Becker : You don't have to worry about that happening here, well, very secure.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : Let's talk portables for a minute. Well, you've got an all-star client roster now. How many of them will follow you here?

  Rosalind Shays : There's a simple rule at my firm, Douglas, you eat what you kill. So any clients are brought in over there, I will bring here with me if I came over.

  Douglas Brackman, Jr. : I love the sound of that.

  Rosalind Shays : Bringing is one thing and keeping them as something else.

  Arnie Becker : Do you anticipate a problem?

  Rosalind Shays : I have some consent.

  Leland McKenzie : Like what?

  Rosalind Shays : Well, let's start with your tax department. I understand that, uh, Stuart Markowitz, is that his name?

  [Rosalind got Stuart] 

  Rosalind Shays : He's it.

  Ann Kelsey : So what's your concern?

  Rosalind Shays : First off, where is he?

  Leland McKenzie : Stuart's in court today.