One Foot in the Grave (TV Series)

I'll Retire to Bedlam (1990)

Annette Crosbie: Margaret Meldrew

Photos 

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Victor Meldrew : [singing]  Oh Danny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling.

  Margaret Meldrew : You must be in a good mood.

  Victor Meldrew : Sunday morning, what is there to be miserable about? Sunday morning, the first day of a new week. I'm going to a nice little potter about in the garden where the insanities of life can't possibly upset me.

• [last lines] 

  Margaret Meldrew : Perhaps you should just have an early night tonight. You'll feel better in the morning.

  Victor Meldrew : Yes, I expect I will. Good night, then. Oh, if you should hear any sudden screams, it's just me smacking on some aftershave.

• Victor Meldrew : Was it my imagination or have they just started building the worlds biggest sub-atomic particle accelerator to explain the very origins of the universe as we know it?

  Margaret Meldrew : What?

  Victor Meldrew : Strange then that they can't produce a toilet roll where the perforations are on the same place on either side of the paper.