Quotes
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Rimmer : Here's another letter for you.
Lister : Who's it from?
Rimmer : Petersen. My god, it's tragic.
Lister : What? Did he die?
Rimmer : Die? Do you think he'd write and tell you?
Lister : Yeah, you're right. I'm not thinking straight. He'd be too busy planning his funeral and everything. So, go on. What's happened?
Rimmer : Something catastrophic. Hideous. He's found your guitar in Starbug's wreckage and he's sending it here.
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Rimmer : [Final scene, Rimmer is reading Lister's appeal letter] "Dear, Mr Lister, your appeal has been successful! From this day forth inmates with no history of violence or depression will be allowed...
[face aghast]
Rimmer : ... to have strings on their guitars." This appeal was all about guitar strings?
Lister : You didn't think it was about getting out of here did you?
Rimmer : You mean to say I've been busting my balls so you can have strings on your lousy stinking guitar?
Lister : You've been a brick, man. And as a personal thank you, I thought I'd write you a song.
[Rimmer is devastated]
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Kryten : You don't know what it's like to be classified as a woman, sir, the humiliation!
Lister : [Bored] I know, I know.
Kryten : I mean, why should I, a series-4000 mechanoid have to endure the turgid monotony of showering with the girls? Three times a week? Tell me that!
Lister : It's not fair I know, it's just...
[Realizing what Kryten said]
Lister : You shower with the girls?
Kryten : So hideously dull, I can't describe it! As they stand there soaping themselves! Their bodies all wet and foamy!
[Everyone is listening with great interest]
Kryten : Can you imagine it?
[Everyone around is listening, silent and open-mouthed]
Kryten : Oh my goodness, we've been frozen in time again! Curious, it must be a warp in the time-space continuum. How curious it isn't affecting me.
Rimmer : We're not frozen in time, Krytie. We were just thinking about what you were saying.
[All the boys cross their legs in unison]
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Rimmer : Sorry to keep droning on about this but what about... THE APPEAL!