Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Bubble Boy (1992)

Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry Seinfeld

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jerry Seinfeld : He's a bubble-boy!

  George Costanza : A bubble-boy?

  Jerry Seinfeld : Yes, a bubble-boy.

  Susan Biddle Ross : What's a bubble-boy?

  Jerry Seinfeld : He lives in a bubble.

  George Costanza : Boy!

• Elaine Benes : Well, what about the sleeping arrangements in the cabin?

  Jerry Seinfeld : Well, um, same bed, and underwear and a t-shirt.

  Elaine Benes : What about me?

  Jerry Seinfeld : Well you'd be naked of course.

• [last lines] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : Something very scary and exciting about fire. People always run to see a fire. They're very proud if they have a fireplace. I think that's what smoking is really all about. That's the power of smoking. It's just this thing, "I got fire right here in my hand. Smoke and fire is literally coming right out of my mouth." It's very intimidating to the nonsmoker, because it's like talking to someone that's going, "My head could open up, lava could explode out, pour right down my face, doesn't bother me a bit." And a cigar is even worse. I mean, a cigar is like, "You think this end is bad, look at this wet, disgusting, chewed-up nub, huh? How scary is that?"

• [first lines] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : Have you ever called someone up, and you're disappointed when they answered the phone? You wanted the machine, you know, and you're always kind of thrown off. You go, "Oh, I, uh... I... I didn't know you were there. I, uh, just wanted to leave a message saying sorry I missed you." So here what we have is two people, hate each other, don't really ever want to talk, but the phone machine is like this relationship respirator keeping these marginal, brain-dead relationships alive, and we all do it. Why? So that when we come home, you can see that little flashing red light. You go, "All right. Messages." You see, people need that. It's very important for human beings to feel they are popular and well-liked amongst a large group of people that we don't care for.