Seinfeld (TV Series)
The Chicken Roaster (1996)
Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry Seinfeld
Photos
Quotes
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Jerry Seinfeld : Hold it. Broccoli? Newman, you wouldn't eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.
Newman : I love broccoli. It's good for you.
Jerry Seinfeld : Really? Then maybe you'd like to have a piece.
[Jerry opens container. Newman takes a piece]
Newman : Gladly.
[Newman spits it out]
Newman : Vile weed!
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George Costanza : I got a date with the sales woman. She's got a little Marisa Tomei thing going on
Jerry Seinfeld : Ah, too bad you got a little George Costanza thing going on.
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Jerry Seinfeld : And one other thing, I don't want Newman using my...
[the toilet flushes and Newman comes out of Jerry's bathroom]
Jerry Seinfeld : ...Oh no!
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Cosmo Kramer : It's the Chicken Roaster sign. It's right across from my window.
Jerry Seinfeld : Can't you shut the shades?
Cosmo Kramer : They *are* shut.
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Elaine Benes : And I bought a whole new set of cookware and a WaterPik.
Jerry Seinfeld : You use a WaterPik?
Elaine Benes : Sure. WaterPik, floss, Plax, brush, Listerine.
Jerry Seinfeld : So you go in the bathroom, eleven, you're in bed by what? two?
Elaine Benes : At the latest.
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Jerry Seinfeld : [after Kramer pours tomato juice on his cereal] What are you doing? That's tomato juice!
Cosmo Kramer : That looked like milk to me!
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Jerry Seinfeld : Seth, if you knew the meeting was so important, why did you go to lunch with me?
Seth : We're old college buddies.
Jerry Seinfeld : I only knew you through Moochie.
Seth : Hey Jerry don't worry about it, the important thing is that we got to catch up. Mind if I grab the want ads?
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Jerry Seinfeld : [to Kramer] How's life on the red planet?