Futurama (TV Series)

Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV (2003)

John DiMaggio: Bender, Human Friend, Sal, Antonio Calculon, Jr. (malfunctioning), Cool-o-Meter, Additional Voices

Photos 

Quotes 

• Bender : And so I ask you this one question. Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?

• Bender : An open casting call for child robots? Tinny Tim, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

  Tinny Tim : What's that, sir?

  Bender : That I, Bender, am perfect for the part.

  Tinny Tim : You've raised my expectations and dashed them quite expertly, sir. Bravo.

• Bender : I read the script, and I think it would help my character's motivation if he was on fire.

  Director : Don't worry about the script. We rewrote the part to better suit your acting abilities.

  Bender : Ah, so now my character has a British accent?

  Director : No, now your character's in a coma. Get in bed and don't move.

• Bender : You're watching Futurama: the show that does not advocate the cool crime of robbery.

• Bender : Bender must be stopped! I have gone too far. Who does that guy think I am?

• Bender : Viewers of the world, do smoking and drinking on TV really make me cool? Of course they do.

  [He blows some cigar smoke] 

  Bender : How 'bout committing crimes and violence? Again, the answer is "yes". But do we really want our kids exposed to that kind of trash on TV? I say absolutely not!

  [He accidentally fires Farnsworth's laser and a laser bolt flies over Farnsworth's head, narrowly missing him. Bender clears his throat] 

  Bender : Uh... on the other hand, most, perhaps all the blame, rests with the parents. That's right, you!

  [He points his firearms at the FART mob and they gasp and duck] 

  Bender : And so I ask you this one question: Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?

• Bender : Antonio here, but you may call me Bender. I've got ants in my butt, and I needs to strut!

• Casting Director : Have you ever been on TV before?

  Bender : Once, when I took those hostages.

  Calculon : I saw that. You were good.

• Bender : Bandidos, eh? This is perfect, because I happen to have a flawless Spanish accent. "I will see Adeeos, Padre. Come, Jesoos, my faithful chee-hua-hua. Tonight we eat some gee-oo-ack-a-mole by del ree-o."

• Bender : [holds two guns]  Listen up, everyone! I have a dramatic speech. Cameraman, camera on me! Director, what's my motivation?

  Director : You're angry.

  Bender : Perfect!

• Monique : [entering a log cabin with Calculon]  Oh, Calculon, it's so good to get away from the city and that beastly, yet intriguing, Bender

  [gasps as she spots Bender gulping down an entire beer keg] 

  Bender : Try this, kids at home!

  [snaps his fingers like a lighter and sets himself on fire]